The Shape of Water has a great screenplay because Guillermo del Toro knows what he’s doing — but it’s quite boring

SEEMS odd to be writing about this film now, when it feels like it was released about 6 months ago - but that’s Oscars campaigning for you.

OK - what do we know about it? Well, it’s set in Cold war era America.

Elisa works in an unnamed secret government facility where she discovers a merman being subjected to all manner of tests.

She falls in love with him and, against the wishes of a bunch of shady officials and Russian sleeper agents, hatches a plan.

We also know this film is destined to continue it’s collection of awards - it may as well run through the trophy rooms covered in Pritt Stick.

We also know it looks sumptuous and that it’s critically acclaimed.

But what I also “know” (and which will upset a lot of people I’m sure) is that it’s *whispers* quite boring.

This critic is in a decidedly un-acclaiming kind of mood.

On the plus sides, it barely even matters that the premise and screenplay isn’t anything to write home about - because it looks and sounds so good.

Del Toro knows exactly what buttons to push and the set pieces (in particular an ethereal scene with a bathroom full of water) are pretty damn perfect.

Sally Hawkins is very good in the lead role, (although fans of Paddington may be shocked at the kind of fur being stroked here) and her relationship with neighbour Giles feels genuine and brings the films best moments.

The music is also an utter joy - Alexandre Desplat’s score suiting the mood and era perfectly.

But, alas, that’s about to for me.

Michael Shannon and Octavia Spencer - both incredible talents - are reduced to caricatures of the same characters they always play, plot-wise nothing much surprised me (bar a delicious finger-snapping scene) and I left feeling decidedly underwhelmed.

I felt nothing for the characters which makes the premise of rooting for the misunderstood a moot point.

I’m aware I’m in a massive minority, but there you go.

I can vaguely see what all the fuss is about, but I think we’re in a Hollywood echo chamber.

The Shape of Water

(15) 123mins

★★★☆☆