Gordon Ramsay opens up about wife Tana’s miscarriage — and reveals terrifying moment they thought they’d lost daughter Tilly too
Celeb chef burst into tears while filming TV show, fearing 14-year-old Tilly had drowned
GORDON Ramsay has opened up about his wife Tana's devastating miscarriage earlier this year — and revealed the moment they thought they'd lost their daughter Tilly as well.
The telly chef, 49, and cookbook author Tana, 42, were heartbroken when she miscarried their fifth child five months into her pregnancy last June.
And they suffered a further blow later in the summer, when they believed 14-year-old Tilly may have drowned.
Gordon told the Daily Mail's magazine that Tilly, their youngest child, had been taking part in a two-and-a-half-mile swim off the coast of Los Angeles, along with her brother Jack, 16.
The swim was being filmed for Tilly's new BBC cookery show for kids, Matilda and the Ramsay Bunch.
Gordon and Tana waited for an hour and 25 minutes on the beach, but while Jack reappeared, there was no sign of Tilly.
Jack dove back in the ocean to look for his sister, but Gordon was stuck on land, as he'd torn his Achilles heel and was on crutches.
Panic set in. I thought we’d lost Tilly. I thought, 'God, what have I done?'
He recalled: "I felt helpless, so scared. I just looked at my wife Tana and we burst into tears.
"There was a search-and-rescue team out there in the water. Panic set in. I thought we’d lost Tilly. I thought, 'God, what have I done? Why did I let her go?'”
Eventually, however, Tilly emerged from the water, no worse for the wear after her gruelling swim.
Gordon said: "I was so relieved I burst into tears again, and I think it was a huge build-up of emotion.
"It was everything coming to the surface and spilling out."
Speaking about the miscarriage, Gordon said: “We were devastated but thankfully we’re through the worst of it now.
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“We’d been so excited and proud... and then there was this awful shock. Losing the baby brought us all so much closer."
He said famous pals Jamie and Jools Oliver and David and Victoria Beckham were among those to offer support to the grieving family.
He added: "You don’t realise until it happens to you how many people are affected. Sadly it happens every day.
"You realise how lucky you are and you reflect on what you have, how fortunate you are with your remaining children, and you remind yourself of what you’ve got."
Gordon had announced Tana's pregnancy on James Corden's Late Late Show just days before she miscarried.
The couple will celebrate their 20th wedding anniversary this year, and have discussed renewing their wedding vows.
Along with Tilly and Jack they have daughters Megan, 17, and Holly, 16.