'i hated myself'
Mama June says she wanted to ‘kill the person she was’ while on drugs after admitting to $2.5K a day meth habit
MAMA June admitted that she wanted to "kill the person she was" while on drugs after confessing to a $2.5K a day meth habit.
She also claimed she finally learned her lesson after making so many mistakes with drugs, even becoming estranged from her children.
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- whose real name is June Shannon - revealed what was going through her head after her emotional reunion with her daughter, Lauryn, also known as Pumpkin.
She told the cameras in a clip for tonight's episode of : "I lost who I was there for a while. I do believe that.
"But I feel the reason I've always felt this way - there's mistakes that I've made in the past that I wish I wouldn't have done but the lesson's learned and that's the truth.
"I've felt that way all my life."
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Producers went on to congratulate the reality TV star for how far she had come since the family tried to do an intervention last season at her sister's home.
She told producers: "I was high on cocaine and when they ambushed me at Doe Doe's house, I had done the night before.
"Why would I be stupid for nothing but my own damn good.
"Because I remember telling you that I hated the person I was and I wanted to kill that person I was, if that made sense.
"I didn't want to kill myself physically but I wanted to kill that personality."
The mother of four then admitted she believes she's left that other person in the past, and is on the road to recovery.
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In last week's episode, Pumpkin, 20, and Mama June, 40, as the matriarch admitted she had done of drugs a day.
"The only reason I sold the house, I was dead f**king broke," Mama June told her shocked daughter.
"Because you know, at that point, we was doing quite a bit. I mean, it was a couple ounces a day. Our habit was $2,500 a day, if not more."
In the observation room, family therapist Dr. Ish looked to be shock.
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"It wasn't something that just started and, 'oh my God, I started using drugs,'" continued, speaking on last Friday's episode of Family Crisis.
"You found out that I got busted. I got high because I wanted to. It's not the first time I've ever done drugs."
The reality star is currently facing charges connected to crack cocaine.
In another recent episode, when , and even sold the family's home.
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Mama June's daughters Alana, 14, and Pumpkin, 20, had to move into a hotel room as "bad" people were looking for their troubled mother.
The mother and grandmother has four daughters: Anna, 25, Jessica, 23, Pumpkin and Alana.
Mama June: From Not to Hot airs at 9 p.m. on Fridays on WE tv.
Mama June admits she spent at least $2.5K a day on meth with boyfriend Geno before latest rehab stint
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