Ricky Gervais’ Golden Globes speech: Best jokes and other highlights

RICKY Gervais is known for shocking the audience (and the world) when he hosts the Golden Globes.

The 2020 award show was no different and this year he stepped his outrageous jokes up a gear.

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What were Ricky Gervais' best jokes at the Golden Globes 2020?

• "I came here in a limo tonight and the licence plate was made by Felicity Huffman."
• "Martin Scorsese said the Marvel films remind him of theme parks. I don't know what he's doing hanging around theme parks - he's not big enough to go on the rides."
• "Knives Out has three nominations tonight. See what can happen when you don't dress people up as Cats?"
• "We were going to do an In Memoriam section, but when I saw the list of people who had died this year, it wasn't diverse enough. It was mostly white people. And I thought, 'No, not on my watch.'"
• "In a moment we're going to see a short clip from The Irishman. It's 88 minutes long."
• "Once Upon a Time in Hollywood was nearly three hours long. Leonardo DiCaprio attended the premiere, and by the end his date was too old for him."
• "Lots of big celebrities here tonight. Legends. Icons. On the same table, there's Al Pacino, Robert De Niro and Baby Yoda. Oh no, that's Joe Pesci, sorry."
• "Kevin Hart was fired from the Oscars for some offensive tweets. Luckily for me, the Hollywood Foreign Press can barely speak English and they've no idea what Twitter is, so I got offered this gig by fax."

What were the other highlights from the Golden Globes 2020?

• Brad Pitt - The actor introduced a clip of Once Upon a Time in Hollywood alongside his co-star, Leonardo DiCaprio. "When I asked Quentin [Tarantino] how he wanted us to play two ageing movie guys who were on their way out, he said 'just be yourselves'," Brad joked.
• Ellen DeGeneres - The talk show host poked fun at acceptance speeches. "I couldn't have done it without my husband Mark. Mark, you are my rock, thank you for supporting me through this crazy journey," she said to big laughs from the audience (which included her wife, Portia De Rossi). "I know it wasn't easy for you or the kids - Rupert and Fiona, go to bed!" she added, despite also not having any children."
• Tom Hanks - The actor got emotional because he wasn't feeling well. He told the audience he was feeling "a little jittery" because of how much orange juice he'd been drinking to try and get over a cold he'd had over the weekend. Being ill turned out to be quite convenient, because when he became teary during his speech, he told the crowd: "It's the cold that is making this happen. I swear to God, I'm not nearly this emotional at home."

What was Ricky Gervais Golden Globes 2020 speech?

Ricky Gervais once again gave a memorable opening speech at the Golden Globes.

In case you missed it, here is that speech in FULL:

"Hello and welcome to the 77th annual Golden Globe Awards, live from the Beverly Hilton Hotel here in Los Angeles. I’m Ricky Gervais, thank you.

"You’ll be pleased to know this is the last time I’m hosting these awards, so I don’t care any more. I’m joking. I never did.

"NBC clearly don’t care either — fifth time. I mean, Kevin Hart was fired from the Oscars because of some offensive tweets — hello?

"Lucky for me, the Hollywood Foreign Press can barely speak English and they’ve no idea what Twitter is, so I got offered this gig by fax.

"Let’s go out with a bang, let’s have a laugh at your expense, shall we? Remember, they’re just jokes. We’re all gonna die soon and there’s no sequel, so remember that.

"But you all look lovely, all dolled up. You came here in your limos. I came here in a limo tonight and the licence plate was made by Felicity Huffman.

"No, shush. It’s her daughter I feel sorry for. OK? That must be the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to her. And her dad was in Wild Hogs.

"Lots of big celebrities here tonight. Legends. Icons. This table alone — Al Pacino, Robert DeNiro … Baby Yoda. Oh, that’s Joe Pesci, sorry. I love you man. Don’t have me whacked.

"But tonight isn’t just about the people in front of the camera. In this room are some of the most important TV and film executives in the world. People from every background. They all have one thing in common: They’re all terrified of Ronan Farrow. He’s coming for ya. He’s coming for ya.

"Look, talking of all you perverts, it was a big year for paedophile movies. Surviving R. Kelly, Leaving Neverland, Two Popes. Shut up. Shut up. I don’t care. I don’t care.

"Many talented people of colour were snubbed in major categories. Unfortunately, there’s nothing we can do about that. The Hollywood Foreign press are all very racist. Fifth time. So.

"We were going to do an In Memoriam this year, but when I saw the list of people that had died, it wasn’t diverse enough. No, it was mostly white people and I thought, nah, not on my watch.

"Maybe next year. Let’s see what happens.

"No one cares about movies any more. No one goes to cinema, no one really watches network TV.

"Everyone's watching Netflix. This show should just be me coming out, going, 'Well done Netflix. You win everything. Good night.' But no, we got to drag it out for three hours. You could binge-watch the entire first season of After Life instead of watching this show.

"That’s a show about a man who wants to kill himself because his wife dies of cancer and it’s still more fun than this.

"Spoiler alert, season two is on the way so in the end he obviously didn’t kill himself. Just like Jeffrey Epstein. Shut up. I know he’s your friend but I don’t care.

"You had to make your own way here, in your own plane, didn't ya?

"Seriously, most films are awful, lazy, remakes, sequels.

"I’ve heard a rumour there might be a sequel to Sophie’s Choice. I mean, that would just be Meryl just going, 'Well, it’s gotta be this one then.'

"All the best actors have jumped to Netflix, HBO. And the actors who just do Hollywood movies now do fantasy-adventure nonsense. They wear masks and capes and really tight costumes.

"Their job isn’t acting any more. It’s going to the gym twice a day and taking steroids, really.

"Have we got an award for most ripped junky? No point, we’d know who’d win that.

"Martin Scorsese, the greatest living director, made the news for his controversial comments about the Marvel franchise.

"He said they’re not real cinema and they remind him about theme parks. I agree. Although I don’t know what he’s doing hanging around theme parks. He’s not big enough to go on the rides. He’s tiny.

"The Irishman was amazing. It was amazing. It was great. Long, but amazing.

"It wasn’t the only epic movie. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, nearly three hours long.

"Leonardo DiCaprio attended the premiere and by the end his date was too old for him.

"Even Prince Andrew was like, 'Come on, Leo, mate. You’re nearly 50 son.'

"The world got to see James Corden as a fat p****. He was also in the movie Cats, but no one saw that.

"And the reviews, shocking. I saw one that said, 'This is the worst thing to happen to cats since dogs.'

"But Dame Judi Dench defended the film saying it was the role she was born to play, because she loves nothing better than plunking herself down on the carpet, lifting her leg and licking her ass. (Coughs) Furball... furball. She’s old-school.

"It’s the last time, who cares?

"Apple roared into the TV game with The Morning Show, a superb drama about the importance of dignity and doing the right thing, made by a company that runs sweatshops in China.

"Well, you say you’re woke but the companies you work for in China — unbelievable. Apple, Amazon, Disney. If Isis started a streaming service you’d call your agent, wouldn’t you?

"So if you do win an award tonight, don’t use it as a platform to make a political speech.

"You’re in no position to lecture the public about anything. You know nothing about the real world. Most of you spent less time in school than Greta Thunberg.

"So if you win, come up, accept your little award, thank your agent, and your God and f*** off, OK?

"It’s already three hours long. Right, let’s do the first award."