I thought ‘I’m going to get it over and done with’, reveals Christine McGuinness in shock suicide confession
'I'd pray every night that I wouldn't wake up in the morning'
PILGRIMAGE star Christine McGuinness has revealed how she came close to killing herself on many occasions in her adolescence.
The model, who’s just appeared on the BBC1 show with other celebrities, made the confession on the Big Fish podcast, out tomorrow, by Spencer Matthews.
The Made in Chelsea star joined Christine on Pilgrimage: The Road Through North Wales, in which she discussed having autism, which caused her severe trauma because it wasn’t diagnosed when she was younger.
She said: “My late teens was where it was really, really difficult. I had years of just thoughts, just passing thoughts, you know ‘I just don’t want to wake up any more’.
“I’d pray every night that I wouldn’t wake up in the morning.”
Asked if she’d ever considered how she would end her life, she said: “I thought about it a lot, I thought about it an awful lot.
“There were times when I took every tablet. My mum had a cupboard with all the medicine in.
“And I didn’t physically take them, but I would take them out of the cupboard and take them up to my bedroom and think ‘Ok, I’m just going to do this tonight, I’m just going to get it over and done with’.
“And it was like something would always happen. Whether it would be my brother shouting at me to go and help him on his Xbox or my sister asking what outfit she should wear.
“It felt like someone would always interrupt me or disturb me.
“It was a really, really low time. It’s not something that I’m completely ok with, that I even thought like that, because that would have been absolutely devastating for my mum.”
YOU'RE NOT ALONE
EVERY 90 minutes in the UK a life is lost to suicide.
It doesn’t discriminate, touching the lives of people in every corner of society – from the homeless and unemployed to builders and doctors, reality stars and footballers.
It’s the biggest killer of people under the age of 35, more deadly than cancer and car crashes.
Yet it’s rarely spoken of, a taboo that threatens to continue its deadly rampage unless we all stop and take notice, now.
That is why The Sun launched the You’re Not Alone campaign.
The aim is that by sharing practical advice, raising awareness and breaking down the barriers people face when talking about their mental health, we can all do our bit to help save lives.
Let’s all vow to ask for help when we need it, and listen out for others… You’re Not Alone.
If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support:
- CALM, , 0800 585 858
- Heads Together,
- Mind, , 0300 123 3393
- Papyrus,, 0800 068 41 41
- Samaritans, , 116 123
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