I wore a red bikini to the Playboy Mansion and a German man offered to have sex with me, says Katherine Ryan
STEPHEN HAWKING developed groundbreaking theories about the universe – and was also a pro in the art of rejecting women.
TV star Katherine Ryan experienced first-hand the brilliant professor’s ruthlessness when she was knocked back — or “pied” — by him at an A-list London party.
Speaking exclusively to The Sun, Katherine, 38, says: “I was trying to chat him up and started to think ‘Wow! Maybe I could go on a date with Professor Hawking’.
"Then, all of a sudden, he seemed very disinterested and his assistant jumped in and said ‘I’m sorry, but Professor Hawking can no longer speak to you because his tablet has no battery’.
“I know — because it’s happened before — when I’m being pied off. I’m being pied off by Stephen Hawking.
“I found out if the power in his wheelchair is working, the tablet is always operating.
“So I was officially pied — and I saw him chatting to people later on.
“It only made me respect him more because that’s exactly what I would do given the same circumstances.”
Being made to look like a “monumental loser” by the legendary late scientist is one of many hilarious anecdotes from Katherine’s brilliant new autobiography, The Audacity.
The Canadian documents how she went from being a waitress in the Toronto branch of Hooters — a US restaurant chain famed for its scantily clad staff — to one of the most popular comedians in the UK, panel show regular and Netflix star.
But it’s not all fun and japes. She also delves into the relationships with former partners — who she refers to as Then Boyfriend, The Overlap and The Sketch Actor — that triggered huge emotional distress, but helped shape the strong, contented person she is today.
She is now settled in a healthy relationship with husband Bobby Kootstra, 38, her first love who she reconnected with in 2018, 20 years after they split following a drunken row at their high school prom.
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The couple, their three-month-old son Fred, and Katherine’s daughter Violet, 12 — who she had with Then Boyfriend — live in a North London mansion that boasts a freshly installed outdoor swimming pool.
She is now living the lavish lifestyle she has always dreamed of and mixes in the same circles as her favourite people, celebrities.
Katherine admits she can’t help but become a “fan girl” when she encounters certain idols, including Kourtney Kardashian.
At the showbiz party where she was knocked back by Professor Hawking, Katherine felt the need to give the reality queen advice.
Kourtney was in the midst of a toxic relationship with Scott Disick, her co-star on global hit TV show Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
Katherine explained: “I told her she needed to break up with Scott.
“She said ‘He’s in my house right now’ and I said, ‘Burn that house down, you need to leave Scott’.”
Katherine then encouraged Kourtney to find one special date.
She added: “I told her to date Prince Harry and she laughed.
“But I was being serious. I would have loved to have seen Prince Harry with Kourtney Kardashian, the amalgamation of the American and British royal families.”
Katherine’s obsession with celebs and popular culture dates back to her upbringing in the small town of Sarnia.
The eldest of three daughters, her parents Finbar, from Ireland, and Julie divorced when she was 15.
She was regularly in school productions and staged impromptu dance routines at home using her sisters as props.
During her teenage years she formed a dance duo with a pal from Toronto Uni, where she had studied city planning.
They were described as “twin Barbies” by a TV producer when they auditioned for dating show Matchmaker in 2002.
Katherine says: “I had a boyfriend who was in America on an ice hockey scholarship, where you basically get paid to punch people and have threesomes with college girls afterwards. It was worth the risk to me.”
The pair later landed jobs as podium dancers on Friday-night TV show Electric Circus, before their thirst for the limelight led to an audition for one of rapper Sean Paul’s hip-hop music videos.
Katherine says they turned up “looking like a couple of extras from the film Clueless”.
Not surprisingly they didn’t get the gig, despite Katherine’s desperate grinding against her pal to “bring her into the energy of the performance”.
She branded the failed aud-ition character-building, saying: “I did it because I saw an opportunity and thought, ‘Why not me?’
“I’d always rather try something fun than back out, for fear of someone having a negative reaction.”
In 2005, meeting another idol, singer-turned-reality-star Jessica Simpson, provided a reality check for Katherine, that being a celebrity is not all it’s cracked up to be.
‘Fun – and unsettling’
Jessica’s MTV series Newlyweds, with husband and former boyband favourite Nick Lachey, had been an international hit.
The singer had gone on to land the role of Daisy Duke in the big-screen version of classic Eighties US TV series The Dukes of Hazzard.
Katherine explains: “I was only young and I thought the best thing you could be was a pop star. That was the epitome of success to me and I didn’t probably account for how micromanaged a pop star’s life would be, how tired it would be.
“Jessica was going through a divorce, this was at the height of her Dukes of Hazzard craze.
“She was the celebrity at the time but I just felt there was a certain shyness to her when I met her — and maybe a sadness.
“It was a really healthy meeting for me because it taught me really young that a lot of showbusiness is not what it seems.”
Still, that did not put her off visiting the Playboy Mansion in Beverly Hills the following year for the annual Kandyland Party.
The dress code for women was “nude” or a variation of nude such as lingerie or bodypaint, and Katherine opted for a red bikini.
She recalls: “It was both fun and unsettling at once. A random German man offered to ‘f*** me for sport’ which I politely declined.
“The biggest celeb at the party was Hugh Hefner but I liked the girls. It was the time in my life defined by and dedicated to beautiful women on reality shows and I just wanted to see them, gain proximity and maybe come out of it a little more like them.
"I could tell they were positioned around Hef as a job. For them, this was less of a party, more a disturbance in their back garden.”
So Katherine is a star in her own right following her comedy breakthrough in the UK, sparked by appearances on TV panel shows including Eight Out Of Ten Cats, QI and Mock The Week.
She also fronts Netflix comedy specials and her own sitcom The Duchess, plus recently hosting ITV2 dating show Ready To Mingle.
So will she now get to have her own fly-on-the-wall series just like her telly idols?
She adds: “I share everything. I share everything in my book, my podcast and on stage.
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“I would be totally fine going on reality TV as well if it was a format I really loved. It certainly wouldn’t put me off as I’m old enough now — I’m up for it!”
Fake boobs fears
UNLIKE many celebrities, Katherine is open about her cosmetic surgery procedures.
The comedian has been having Botox and lip filler since her early twenties to boost her confidence.
She also had a boob job in 2004, but says she is considering having her implants removed, believing they could contribute to her lupus, a condition that affects the immune system.
It can cause problems with the skin, joints, kidneys and other organs.
Katherine, diagnosed in 2008, explains: “It’s something I’ve considered for many years.
"Breast implants were in fashion in the early Noughties and this is why I try to communicate to women that your body should never be a trend, as trends change so often.
“It was bang on trend to have breast implants in 2002 and 2004 when I got them. I’ve read literature that they could contribute to autoimmune disease – it’s never the best idea to have bags of silicone in your body, is it?”
However, despite the health risk, she doesn’t regret boosting her cup size.
She adds: “They have brought me joy, I will say, and made me feel more balanced in my shape.
“However, if I never had them and the choice was offered to me now, would I get breast implants? I wouldn’t bother.”
- The Audacity, by Katherine Ryan, (Bonnier Books Ltd) is out now, £20.
