COOL RUNNINGS

‘I prefer to arrive late in this world than early in the next’: The slickest pilot announcements ever made

The quick-witted remarks include apologies over bumpy landings and jibes at grumpy passengers over late departures

PILOTS have a lonely job, spending at least eight hours of every day cooped up in a cockpit with just one other human being for company.

So it’s hardly surprising that they unleash moments of genius in the rare opportunity they get to take over the plane PA.

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Passengers have been sharing the slickest lines pilots have said on flightsCredit: Getty Images

Passengers have been sharing the slickest lines pilots have said on flights on the online forum .

The quick-witted remarks range from topics like the weather to the grumpiness of passengers over a late arrival.

Read on to see some of our favourites…

Cool under pressure 

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Passenger Tim Morgan said: “In 1982, A British Airways flight from Singapore to Australia flew next to an erupting volcano near Indonesia, and ash shut down all four of the engines.

The quick-witted remarks range from topics like the weather to the grumpiness of passengersCredit: Getty Images

The captain said: 'Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking.

'We have a small problem - all four engines have stopped. We are doing our damnedest to get them going again. I trust you are not in too much distress.'”

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Welcome to your private plane

Passenger Doug Massey said: "My favourite is what the pilot said to me when I was the only passenger on a plane meant for 100.

“They said: ‘Welcome to the Doug Massey Private Airline. We hope you enjoy your flight to Burlington.

'After we’ve reached the cruising altitude, I’ll turn off the seat belt sign and encourage you to try all the other seats in the cabin and let us know which one you like best.'"

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