POP the Pringles. Crack open the Cognac. And bang up that bunting.
Yes, the international break is finally over and after a glut of goalless draws and games about as gripping as my life, we can return to the Premier League, or, as Tony Pulis calls it – the Premiership.
And there some tasty fixtures to whet your appetite too – Arsenal v Spurs, Bournemouth v Huddersfield, Burnley v Swansea and Brighton v Stoke, to name but one.
But here’s the thing. No matter how bad these games may turn out to be they’ll still be immeasurably more interesting than watching international friendlies.
Not difficult, I know…
ARSENAL v SPURS
What a way to get the weekend off and running. The North London derby returns and it’s high time Arsenal got their you know what together in this fixture.
The Gunners are on their longest ever winless run against Spurs in the league, with no wins in the last six meetings (D4, L2).
But they’ll come into the game with confidence high, not least because they’ve won their opening five games of a Premier League season for the first time since 2009/10.
Another victory here and they’ll have won their first six at home since 2007/08.
We can also expect miraculous recoveries from Spurs’ trio Dele Alli, Harry Winks and Harry Kane after they pulled out of the England friendlies.
The latter is the man to watch, as ever. He’s scored in all five of his league games against Arsenal, notching six goals.
The good news is that Mike Dean – a referee who appeared to celebrate a Spurs goal on the pitch once – is taking charge of this game.
Expect clangers and calamities galore and Arsene Wenger blowing his Gallic top on the touchline. That’s always entertaining for the neutral.
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: AWAY WIN
BOURNEMOUTH v HUDDERSFIELD
Two teams here who seem to have dragged themselves out of their recent slumps, both grabbing a couple of much-needed wins from their last three games.
It’ll be a relief to Eddie Howe whose Bournemouth side have escaped the bottom three and he’ll be expecting another three points here as the Cherries have never lost a Premier League home match against a newly-promoted side (W5, D1), winning those games by a total scoreline of 17 goals to just three.
After wins against Manchester United and, most recently, West Brom, David Wagner’s Terriers seem to have come through their mini-blip too but they’ve only won one of their last 10 meetings against Bournemouth in all competitions.
Interestingly, this is the first time these two sides have ever met in the Premier League and, as such, it is the 847th different Premier League meeting in the history of the competition.
There’s a prize for anyone who can name the other 846.*
(* No, there isn’t.)
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: HOME WIN
BURNLEY v SWANSEA
Here’s a thing. If Burnley win at Turf Moor it will be the first time since 1975 that the Clarets have won three top-flight games on the spin.
There’s every chance they’ll do it too. Who cares is they don’t score many goals? They don’t concede many either. In fact, only Manchester United (0) and Liverpool (1) have conceded fewer goals at home than Burnley’s two.
Big questions are being asked of Swansea manager Paul Clement too. T
he Swans have lost five of their last six league games (W1, L5) but there is light at the end of the tunnel in that they won all four of their Premier League meetings with Burnley.
Not much light, admittedly, but light nonetheless.
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: HOME WIN
AUTO TRADERS Forget the Ferraris and Porsches… we love the Premier League stars in reasonably priced cars
CRYSTAL PALACE v EVERTON
Will Everton have a new manager by the time this game kicks off? Who knows? Or cares?
Now that ‘Big’ Sam Allardyce has ruled himself out and they’re still waiting on ‘Medium’ Marco Silva, it may well be down to ‘Big’ Dave Unsworth to take the reins again.
The Toffees climbed to 15th last time out after that epic comeback win against Watford and given that they’ve only lost once in 20 away games against teams that started the day bottom of the table (W9, D10) you’d expect them to fancy their chances here too.
But I’d put hard-earned money (someone else’s, not mine) on them not winning here. Though their place at the foot of the Premier League suggests otherwise, Palace are picking things up lately but Lady Luck just isn’t smiling on them.
If Roy’s strugglers do lose then they will equal Everton and QPR’s record for the fewest points won after 12 matches (4) of a Premier League season.
And that’s something to be proud of, right?
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: HOME WIN
LEICESTER CITY v MANCHESTER CITY
Pundits keep saying that they’re running out of superlatives to describe this current Manchester City side.
Whether that’s down to just how impressive City are or merely a limited vocabulary caused by a poor education is neither here nor there.
Suffice to say, City are decent and their 31 points from a possible 33, with a goal difference of +31, is, officially, the best-ever start in any Premier League campaign.
They’re also aiming to become only the second team ever to win their first six away matches in a Premier League campaign, after Chelsea won their opening eight back in 2008/09.
It could be a record-equalling afternoon for Sergio Aguero again too. If he scores against the Foxes he’ll equal his personal record of scoring in six consecutive league games for City.
Don’t count Leicester out though. They’re unbeaten in their last five (W2, D3), although it has to be said that each of those games was against the very dregs of the Premier League so it’s not that much to write home about.
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: AWAY WIN
LIVERPOOL v SOUTHAMPTON
It’s hard to see anything other than a comfortable home win here as Liverpool, who’ve only lost two of their last 32 league games at Anfield, host mid-table Southampton.
But there is that nagging doubt over Liverpool’s defence that continues to derail the progress they’ve made under Jurgen Klopp and Southampton may just be the side to exploit it.
The Saints are unbeaten in their last five games against the Reds in all competitions (W3, D2) and, here’s the thing, Klopp has to beat them in the four matches he’s had against them as Liverpool boss.
But the Reds should have too much going forward to have any real worries and in Mo Salah they have a player at the top of his game.
If the Egyptian scores here he could equal (or even break) Robbie Fowler’s club record of eight goals in his first 12 Premier League matches.
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: HOME WIN
WEST BROM v CHELSEA
If any Baggies’ fans are feeling a little low then I’m afraid I’ve got very little to say to cheer you up as you watch your plummet down the table, playing the kind of football last seen in the Middle Ages.
Three defeats on the trot have left West Brom just one point away from the relegation zone and their record against reigning champions stinks, to be frank. They’ve played 11 home games against the previous season’s title winners and lost the lot, scoring eight goals and conceding 28.
This game was not only where Chelsea wrapped up the title last season but it will also be Antonio Conte’s 50th league match in charge of the Blues and the Italian has steered them to more points (115) than any other side in the division since the start of last season.
Mind you, if Chelsea lose at the Hawthorns it’s unlikely he’ll have many more.
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: AWAY WIN
MANCHESTER UNITED v NEWCASTLE
For those with a passionate dislike of Manchester United, it’s heartening to watch Jose Mourinho turning them into one of the dullest sides imaginable. So what if they’re doing OK and the defence are the meanest in the Premier League – they’re still about as enthralling to watch as Location Location Location.
But they are very effective, especially at Old Trafford where they haven’t lost in 22 league games (W12, D10, L10) and haven’t conceded a goal in the last six.
They may even have Messrs Pogba and Ibrahimovic back on the bench this weekend too.
For all their promise under Rafa Benitez, Newcastle will do well to get anything from a fixture where they’ve only one once in their last 32 attempts in the league.
Mind you, if they do pull off a shock win here Rafa will become the first manager in the history of the Premier League to win at Old Trafford with three different clubs, having already done the business there with Chelsea and Liverpool.
Can we see that happening? No, not really.
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: HOME WIN
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WATFORD v WEST HAM
He’s back! Yes, David Moyes has landed another plum job and West Ham fans are less than impressed.
Time to give the bloke a break though. After all, this will be his 500th Premier League match as a manager and only Fergie, Arsene Wenger an Harry Redknapp have managed to make it so far before.
On paper, it looks like a fairly straightforward start for Moyes but football’s not played on paper.
Watford have lost just one of their last six Premier League matches against the Hammers (W3, D2) while West Ham have only one win in their last 13 league away games (W1, D6, L6)
Keep an eye (or two) for the Hornets’ young Brazilian Richarlison too.
He’s second only to Harry Kane in the number of shots attempted this season (39). Mind you, he’s only got seven on target and scored just four so there’s still work to be done.
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: DRAW
BRIGHTON v STOKE
It says something about the allure of this Monday night fixture that the Seagulls have been bombarding me with emails of offers on cheap tickets for this game for ages.
I’m not saying Stoke aren’t the most attractive of opposition but on a cold Monday night? And when I’m A Celebrity has started?
Still, there’s a very positive air at the Amex at the moment after a four-match unbeaten run (W2, D2) that’s seen Chris Hughton’s side climb to the heady heights of 8th place.
Seagulls’ fans will be expecting another win here but it won’t be a doddle. Stoke have won their last eight games against the Albion and after that 1-0 win at Watford the Potters could win back-to-back away games for the first time since October 2015.
They won’t though.
SUNSPORT PREDICTION: HOME WIN