CAST your mind back two years to the World Cup in Qatar.
There, the FA and Harry Kane insisted that the England skipper would wear a rainbow armband in support of the LGBTQ+ community, after FIFA had awarded hosting rights to a nation which criminalises homosexuality.
Six other western European nations were going to take the same stand.
Until the point when FIFA insisted that those captains making this "political" gesture would be booked.
Until the point where that gesture might have some sporting consequence - and therefore a more substantial meaning.
At that point, the FA and their six allies all performed a late U-turn. They bottled it.
That’s the thing with English football and its "support" for the LGBTQ+ community.
They are happy to show them support by virtue signalling with meaningless gestures. Meaningful gestures, not so much.
Two years later, the FA have disappeared down a rabbit hole again with their absurd double standards in allowing Ipswich captain Sam Morsy - a practising Muslim - not to wear a rainbow armband, while reprimanding Crystal Palace skipper Marc Guehi - a devout Christian - for daubing his armband with the words "I love Jesus" and then "Jesus Loves You".
This is patent nonsense. It is discrimination wrapped up in the excuse of a "rules is rules" technicality.
English football wanted to make a stand against the staging of the World Cup in Qatar.
But when it comes to allowing Newcastle to be funded by the Saudi regime - which subjugates women and criminalises homosexuality - or for the Abu Dhabi government to bankroll Manchester City, it turns a blind eye.
When England defender Guehi - the son of a Christian minister - made his first stand in Saturday’s 1-1 draw against Newcastle, visiting captain Bruno Guimaraes dutifully wore his rainbow armband.
Yet the regime which is allowed to pay his wages clearly doesn’t share the values this armband supposedly represents.
On Tuesday, by quirk of the fixture list, Guehi and Morsy - a British-born Egypt international - were pitted against one another, further highlighting the absurdity of one man being allowed not to wear an armband and another man being warned for writing on that armband.
Then there is the case of Manchester United’s Muslim defender Noussair Mazraoui refusing to wear a specially-designed pre-match warm-up jacket to mark the club’s Rainbow Laces match against Everton.
As a result, United decided none of their players would wear the jackets so as not to disrupt team unity.
So United wanted to show support for LGBTQ+ rights - but only until the point that it became difficult for them.
Personally, I feel grateful not to have been brought up with any religion in my life and believe that any organised religion causes more harm than good.
But I also recognise Guehi, Morsy, Mazraoui and anyone else with religious faith has every right to practice their beliefs.
I also consider the principle behind the rainbow campaign to be a sound one.
That people should be free to love whomever they want to love, and not have to hide their sexuality.
In an increasingly secular society, most people agree with that basic statement.
Inclusivity shouldn’t be a dirty word. Gay people have, with good reason, felt excluded from participating in football and attending matches.
The fact that there still aren’t any openly "out" gay footballers in the Premier League suggests there remains a lot of work to be done.
But when campaigns are besmirched by such absurdities as the FA’s capitulation in Qatar and the double standards shown to Guehi and Morsy, they simply stoke the beliefs of intolerant people and are self-defeating.
They give credence to the idea that the FA are a fanatically "woke" organisation, when that isn’t the case.
The FA, and English football in general, are simply desperate to recognise everyone and everything all the time.
It is rare to attend an England match without a minute’s silence. Which usually turns into applause.
Often with a recently-deceased former England player or manager being offered a silence in association with the victims of some terrible war or natural disaster overseas. Rendering it all pretty meaningless.
It also feels weird that before every England game, there are around 100 serving military personnel on the pitch.
Even weirder when, last month, the opposition was the Republic of Ireland, whose population are understandably not keen on the sight of uniformed British squaddies.
This is actually the opposite of "wokeness" - whatever that means - and it is jarring just the same.
Then there’s Remembrance Day. I happen to wear a poppy - or, more often, I buy several and lose them all - as a personal mark of respect to relatives who fought and died, and a recognition of my own good fortune in not having had to suffer the same horrors as my grandfather and great-grandfather.
But football has taken Remembrance Day to extreme degrees - with The Last Post being played and silences observed as early as October.
And it also allows James McClean, an open supporter of IRA terrorism, to make his own views known. Views which are abhorrent to most of us.
Gesture politics in football have become an ugly moral maze - underlined by the idiocy surrounding the treatment of Guehi and Morsy.
In an angry and divided nation, the only intelligent conclusion is that football should be a safe space - away from politics, religion, the military or any other cause.
