Dad who murdered wife and three kids was a secret cross-dressing porn addict
Deputy principal Alan Hawe, 40, was allegedly caught watching porn on his laptop at school before he killed his whole family
THE evil dad who killed himself after he murdered his wife and three children was addicted to porn and enjoyed wearing his wife's underwear.
Alan Hawe, 40 slaughtered his his family with knives, a hatchet and his bare hands at their home in County Cavan, Ireland, in 2016.
The deputy principal, who wrote a five-page suicide letter, had allegedly been caught watching porn at school.
Clodagh's mum, Mary Coll, said: “We know now . . that he was dressing in Clodagh’s underwear.
“I mean, Clodagh would never in her wildest dreams have thought of that, none of us would.
“We only found that out after the inquest.
“He said as well ‘when I go back to school it will all blow up’. What, we don’t know. Was he going to face a grievance?
"If he was masturbating in the school, at the very least he was guilty of professional misconduct.”
The 40-year-old said he killed his sons because he "couldn't leave the boys orphans."
KNIVES AND HATCHET
Clodagh and her sons Liam, 14, Niall, 11, and six-year-old Ryan were discovered at the family home in August after Hawe had been .
Jacqueline Connolly , Clodagh's sister, said: "Reading the letter, it would seem that he killed Clodagh first and he sat and he wrote five pages about how he felt, and how the truth was going to come out eventually and he reassured us that, if it was any consolation, they were happy.
“And he then killed the boys and he came downstairs then and he wrote some more.
"And then he transferred money and went about his business while his family were dead around him.
"He set out folders and wrote notes.”
, a psychiatric expert diagnosed the killer with depression that progressed to “psychotic” symptoms by the time he killed his family.
Speaking on a Claire Byrne Live special, Jacqueline described how brutally the family were killed and said: “That is evil. That is not depression. That is force brutality and it is control.”
And grieving Mary said the depression diagnosis is a lie.
She said: “I wanted to shout from the rooftops — that’s not the truth, that’s not what happened.
I’m sorry for how I murdered them all but I had no other way. I had to do this. I can’t leave the boys orphans.
Alan Hawe
“We’ve been controlled since this happened by our decency, our sense of decency, but it’s not easy to sit and talk about this.
“But we just feel that people need to be aware of the truth and that is the truth.
“We just need answers to the questions. You know, he was caught. What was he doing, where was he doing it? Why did he feel the need that he had to wipe out his whole family? What was so bad that he was doing?”
She added: “He never missed time from work, he was never sick. He had a position of responsibility. He showed no signs of depression, he was out, GAA, football, out and about.”
And Jacqueline added: “He said in his letter, ‘If it’s any consolation, we were happy. Clodagh was happy, the boys were happy, we were happy’.
“It’s very rare you would hear someone suffering from depression say that they were happy.”
Four weeks ago, Mary and Jacqueline were officially refused their legal request for copies of the files from the investigation into the murders.
They are now calling for a new and full inquiry into the murders of Clodagh, Liam, Niall and Ryan.
FIVE-PAGE SUICIDE NOTE
Alan left behind a chilling five-page suicide note. Jacqueline revealed it’s likely he killed Clodagh, wrote the lengthy letter, then killed his sons, before returning to the letter.
His letter read: “I’m sorry for how I murdered them all but I had no other way. I had to do this. I can’t leave the boys orphans. I couldn’t just up and leave them . . . Please believe me that on this day Clodagh and the boys were happy.
“I have wanted to kill myself for a long time now and I could not bear the thought of leaving my mess and the anger and rejection Clodagh and the boys would have to live with forever.”
Jacqueline said the family are tortured by so many unanswered questions, saying: “There were bits and pieces of information and we went through an inquest.
“The law for the inquest is very limited so we only find out where, when, how it happened and who it happened to. But we never found out the why — and we were advised that that probably would never happen at the inquest.
“But (Hawe) has said in his own words that he was caught red-handed and we do know that he was looking at pornography on the school laptop and he never brought the school laptop home.
“He had said he was masturbating somewhere that he shouldn’t have been, possibly at the school. So we have pieces of information. We don’t know why he was ringing the Irish National Teachers’ Organisation. We don’t know where it happened or when.
I go (to the graveyard) once or twice a week. I just sit, I just can’t believe they’re there.
Clodagh's mum
“We know, in the June, he cancelled all his counselling sessions and this all happened the day before he was to return to school so it was avoidance of the consequences he was about to face.”
She continued: “We’ve requested the files from the Gardai and they’ve declined that request from our legal representative.
“But we feel an injustice has been done to Clodagh and the boys . . . And we feel that we need the truth. He said he was leading them to a life of ruin essentially and Clodagh would have to clean up his mess.
"We still don’t know what that mess is.
“He said the truth was going to come out sometime. We don’t know what that truth is.”
Mary also revealed that they bizarrely found out Alan was wearing his wife’s underwear but they don’t know how it fitted in with the murder-suicide.
Jacqueline added: “We’ve actually never spoken to anyone from the school at all since they died.”
Mary told how she still visits the family’s grave regularly, saying: “I go once or twice a week. I just sit, I just can’t believe they’re there.
"I don’t get any comfort, I can’t pray, I can’t talk to them.
“It’s easier not to believe that they’re gone. It’s hell. It’s the only way you can describe it.”
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Clodagh’s family are calling for a number of measures in the wake of the tragedy. They are calling on Garda Commissioner Drew Harris to set up a special investigation unit for familicide and family annihilation.
They also want Minister for Justice Charlie Flanagan to amend the Succession Act, 1965, as it currently makes the perpetrator or, if deceased, their family a beneficiary of the estate.
And the heartbroken Coll family are urging State Authorities and Agencies, the general public and the media not to automatically assume that a man who murders his partner and children perpetrated such a crime because they were mentally ill.
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