Horrid Samantha Markle is the perfect ugly step-sister for panto season as she’s done nothing but criticise The Duchess of Sussex
IT’S not yet panto season, but Samantha Markle must be a shoo-in as the ultimate Ugly Sister.
This horrid woman has done nothing but carp at and criticise her half-sister Meghan.
It began almost straight after Meghan’s engagement to Prince Harry was announced and carried on through the lead-up to the Royal Wedding and beyond.
Only in the past week has Samantha realised that being vile and vindictive has achieved nothing other than making her look like a green-eyed witch (but spelt with a B).
Among her most hurtful outbursts were that Meghan was cold and inhumane and that the marriage was doomed to failure.
She was also apparently behind those stupid staged paparazzi shots of Meghan’s dad Thomas trying on suits before the wedding. It was those paid-for photos that led to him having “health problems” and failing to walk his daughter down the aisle.
After appearing on every TV and radio outlet that would pay for her bile-fuelled rants, Samantha recently tried to gain entrance to Buckingham Palace to meet Meghan.
She was, quite rightly, told by grim-faced security staff to bog off.
None of Samantha’s vitriol has stuck and most of the world has fallen almost as head-over-heels in love with Meghan as her besotted husband — especially since the news broke that they are expecting.
Given that no one is interested in Samantha’s hysterical attacks on her sister, she wants to bury the hatchet.
She has apologised for any past tensions and exclaimed that she’s jumping with joy at the baby news.
It’s too little too late, and I’m sure Meghan would agree.
Samantha has crossed the line too many times to be forgiven now.
If she had shown any loyalty she might have been invited to the wedding and welcomed into the royal fold. But instead of acting as a peace-maker, Samantha stirred bad feeling between Meghan and her estranged father.
A loving sister would have tried to build bridges, unite family factions and show solidarity with Meghan.
I’m sure the new Duchess of Sussex would have welcomed having family members around her as she adjusted to life in the royal goldfish bowl.
In the end, Meghan had only ONE close relative at her wedding, her mum Doria.
Along with the absence of the late Princess Diana, it was the day’s only sad note.
Samantha could have had a starring role as a loyal sister helping Meghan adjust from successful actress to worldwide megastar.
The media would have fallen over themselves to talk to her for insights into her famous sister, but not any more. We are all very tired of Samantha’s negativity and venom.
No one has any time for her any more, and for such an attention-seeker that has got to hurt.
If she had been kind to Meghan, Samantha would still be relevant. TV stations, magazines and newspapers would be asking her about the mum-to-be and she would be at the heart of all the pregnancy coverage.
Jealous and malicious
Instead of being a loyal, loving and supportive source of information about Meghan, Samantha is now dismissed as jealous, irrelevant and malicious. No one cares about her opinion any more.
Meanwhile, Meghan has won over Australia with a charm offensive that shows no sign of flagging. She and Harry are a true partnership.
Unlike the tension between his parents Princess Diana and Prince Charles, Harry is genuinely delighted to see the enthusiasm and love for his wife during this tour.
Charles would famously get the hump because everyone wanted to meet Diana on royal walkabouts.
In contrast, Harry and Meghan are relaxed, spontaneous and genuinely adore each other. It has been good to see them having fun and giving hugs and smiles to the crowds.
While Meghan grows in confidence and the public’s affection, Samantha is now an irrelevance.
It’s her own fault and she has to live with it. She will always have her nose pressed against the window pane of whatever palace her little sister is in at the time.
Still, Sam, there’s always panto, eh?
Keira Disney have to be so smug
ONE of the great joys of my life was watching Disney movies with my daughter when she was growing up.
We watched my childhood favourites Dumbo, Bambi and Snow White, then I sat through Beauty And The Beast and The Little Mermaid about two thousand and ten times.
So I was bemused to hear that Keira Knightley has banned her three-year-old daughter from watching some Disney movies such as Cinderella because the characters are “rescued” by men.
This is rather joyless.
Cinders might have been wooed by a man dumb enough not to recognise the love of his life until her foot fitted inside a glass slipper, but Belle from Beauty And The Beast is a book-loving, independent girl who tells the handsome but horrible Gaston to sling his hook and falls for the Beast because of the man he is inside. Pocahontas, Tiana, Merida, Rapunzel and especially Mulan are all kick-ass, feisty females.
Disney remade Cinderella in 2015 and she was a very different character.
Keira doesn’t have to let her daughter watch Cinderella when there are so many alternatives available, but she also doesn’t need to be so blinking sanctimonious about it.
Justifiable Homicide
So Joanna in The Cry is actually in court accused of murdering her sleazebag of a husband after they faked the kidnapping of their dead baby.
It’s the last episode tomorrow, when we will find out what the heck has been going on.
But if Joanna, played by Jenna Coleman, left, really did kill husband Alistair, I reckon it’s justifiable homicide.
The ghastly toad sat with his eyemask on and earplugs in, leaving her to deal with a screeching baby all through that epic flight to Australia.
Surely on those grounds alone no court would convict her.
Freddie's Kind of Magic
I ADORED Freddie Mercury and would have gladly given a year of my life to be a fly on the wall at one of his notoriously extravagant and outrageous parties.
He was a complete one-off, so I was always rather sceptical and a bit concerned about any film that would try to depict his extraordinary life and capture his sheer showmanship.
Thankfully, the makers of new film Bohemian Rhapsody found the ridiculously talented .
He doesn’t so much play the part of Freddie but rather inhabits his body and brings him back to life.
It’s an Oscar-worthy performance that is both funny and deeply moving and Rami is backed up by the perfectly cast three other members of Queen.
Gwilym Lee as Brian May is so uncannily like the ace guitarist that his wife Anita Dobson thought she had actually gone back in time, as he’s the spitting image of Brian when the two of them met.
The Live Aid sequence, recreating the moment when Freddie and the band blew everyone away with their barnstorming performance, gave me goosebumps.
I blubbed a lot during this movie, as well as laughing out loud.
It also had me rushing to download all the original Queen albums and rediscovering tracks like Keep Yourself Alive and Doing All Right, as well as the classics such as Killer Queen and We Are The Champions.
It’s a cracking film and a love letter to one of the greatest entertainers and most charismatic rock stars of all time.
Nadine says Aloud what we all knew
WELL, what a shock and surprise that Girls Aloud’s Nadine Coyle and Cheryl were never best pals. . . said no one ever.
It was clear that these two, below in 2007, never really hit it off right from the start when the girls won TV talent show Popstars: The Rivals in 2002 against boyband One True Voice.
Back then Nadine was very much the star and lead vocalist, which led to tensions in the group.
The girls split into two factions – Nadine and Sarah Harding on one side and Cheryl, Nicola Roberts and Kimberley Walsh on the other.
Tellingly, Nadine said the girls have never had a big fall-out because they were never really friends in the first place.
This is what tends to happen when boy and girl bands are thrown together in a reality show and don’t have a shared history.
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Cracks appear and there are resentments over who is perceived as being centre stage.
A notable exception are the hugely likeable Little Mix, who put all their energies into their music and also to ensuring they give out positive messages about self-esteem and body confidence to their legions of fans.
These girls have become genuinely good friends who have each other’s backs and who know that they are stronger together than they would be if they had to stand alone.