Why there’s no way I’d waste my money on a TV licence to watch a crusty old relic like the BBC
IT was after the BBC had told me I was under "formal investigation" for the fifth time that I decided the licence fee charade had gone on long enough.
I scooped my impressive collection of warning letters into the bin, took the plug out of the TV and logged on to cancel the yearly fee allowing us to tune in to the Beeb.
In the beginning, my housemates were a little miffed that I didn't ask them first, but our letters from Auntie had raised two very good questions for us all to consider.
One: who on Earth still sends letters?
And two: is the licence fee really worth it when you're a member of generation Netflix?
I'm 21 and, like many people my age, my TV serves as more of a decorative living-room ornament than a relevant piece of tech.
When you can stream a library of millions of shows on a laptop or tablet, it feels a bit backwards to sit down and subject yourself to a TV schedule which someone else has decided for you.
So it makes sense that, last year, I joined the 3.5million Brits who cancelled their licence fee - saving myself a tidy £147 to spend on things I'll actually enjoy.
When people my age want to watch quality shows, we fire up Netflix, home to Narcos and Stranger Things, check out Amazon Prime's catalogue of original series or flick on reality-TV service Hayu for a dose of the Kardashians.
With these streaming sites, you've got a vast catalogue of high-quality original entertainment at the touch of a button, produced and uploaded faster than anyone could possibly watch it.
The comparison doesn't reflect well on the BBC - a creaking, crusty old relic known for dry news and even drier programming.
Where Netflix has glossy, must-watch documentaries and laugh-out-loud comedies, the BBC has hysterical anti-Brexit coverage and recycled episodes of Open All Hours.
One costs you a monthly subscription fee of £5.99 (£71.88 over 12 months), while the other is essentially taxed out of you - on threat of being banged up - at a rate of £147 a year.
It's a no-brainer which business model belongs in 2018 and which should be consigned to the dustbin of history.
What £147 can get you
If you want to watch colour TV, or use BBC iPlayer, you'll have to fork out £147 per year for the licence fee.
, meanwhile, has three monthly plans, ranging from £5.99 to £9.99, depending on what features you want.
The basic plan works out at £71.88 per year - less than half the cost of a licence fee - while the most expensive plan comes in at £119.88 per year.
A subscription to rival streaming site will cost you £7.99 per month, working out at £95.88 per year - nearly £50 cheaper than a licence fee.
Meanwhile, reality-TV addicts can get a subcription to , which costs £3.99 per month, or £47 per year.
But the trouble is, if you don't like the BBC you can't just, you know, not buy it - like you'd do with any other service you can think of.
Don’t want to cough up? Expect a slew of official letters warning that Auntie could haul you into court for a rap on the knuckles at any time.
If you leave it too long to pay, you’re then faced with the threat of BBC heavies turning up at your door to check whether your aerial is plugged in, only to be told that all this could go away if only you'd hand over the money.
The bullies who send these letters know that millions of people, particularly older ones, will be coerced into coughing up by the official tone and complex guidelines for cancelling the licence fee.
And so every year, millions of people begrudgingly relent and hand over £147 to an organisation which couldn’t care less about them.
But younger people are waking up to see the BBC for what it is: a scam.
Admittedly, I like Blue Planet as much as the next person, but it's hard to justify spending just shy of £150 for HD footage of some dolphins.
So it's not like we're missing out by ditching the Beeb, when streaming sites are pumping out quality shows at an unbelievable rate, and reams of well-written news are available online.
“But the BBC offers good value for money because it’s impartial,” claim its supporters. Yeah right, pull the other one.
Only last week, a study of Auntie’s EU news coverage showed that the BBC has an "overwhelming" bias against Brexit.
The report, by think-tank Civitas, found just 3.2 per cent of interviewees on the Today show since 2005 were anti-EU, despite strong public support for Brexit throughout this time.
The fact that, by default, everyone is forced to pay for the BBC fuels its Europhile tendencies by providing it with no incentive to actually engage with British people - or produce any decent shows for that matter.
Nowhere is this more obvious than on the toe-curling Facebook feed of BBC3, a channel so phenomenally unpopular that the Beeb axed it from the airwaves entirely.
Despite this, BBC3 lumbers on online, where it churns out niche, hyper-PC videos which we're all paying for.
I dare you to watch classic BBC3 clip without wondering whether your £147 would be better off in your own pocket.
Other videos you’ve funded include , and, of course, .
See, what the crusty old BBC is trying to do here is appear cool and relevant to "the youth".
But, like many others, the BBC has been duped into thinking that loud, hysterical snowflakes are representative of an entire generation, so it has skewed its content to be hyper left-wing and social justice-oriented to reflect that.
In reality, the young silent majority is too busy getting on with our lives to pay any mind to the whiny students who give us a bad name.
But we're starting to get really sick of being forced to fund a backwards organisation which doesn't understand - or care about - us.
A beginner's guide to Netflix
Into crime dramas like BBC's McMafia or Sherlock? Check out legendary Netflix original Narcos or prison series Orange Is The New Black.
Prefer documentaries? Try Making a Murderer for a gritty look at how a wrongful conviction changed one man's life forever.
Like period drama, Poldark style? Netflix's The Crown is a masterpiece of the genre.
If sci-fi or horror is more your thing, Stranger Things is a must-see, while the new episodes of Black Mirror will stay with you for days after you stop watching.
And if you're a comedy fan, you'll be pleased to learn that most BBC comedies worth watching, like The Thick of It, The Office, and Gavin and Stacey are on Netflix anyway, alongside cracking originals like Bojack Horseman.
But don’t expect Auntie to modernise any time soon - and certainly not while it can fall back on the hard-earned money of licence fee payers.
The licence fee model is so outdated that there’s still an option to pay less if you’re watching on a black and white TV.
And the BBC is also accused of paying its women far less than its men, another surefire sign that it's well and truly stuck in the past.
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Thankfully, there's an easy way to drag the BBC, kicking and screaming, into 2018.
All you have to do it , unplug the telly and treat yourself to a Netflix or Amazon subscription instead.
This way, the BBC will be forced to adopt a similar model where – like every other service we use – it may actually have to produce some good content before people are willing to pay for it.