RUSSIA is considering setting up a ‘Ministry of Sex’ in the latest desperate attempt to remedy the country’s plummeting libido and birth rates.
The demographic slide has undeniably been made worse by Putin sending his soldiers to fight in his war against Ukraine - resulting in the deaths of over 600,000 Russian soldiers.
The dictator’s officials continue to come up with myriad ideas to stop plummeting birth rates - but have had those ideas slammed by some brave women in Russia.
One unbelievable proposal is to turn off the Internet - and even the lights - between 10pm and 2am to encourage couples to have sex.
Another bizarre idea is for the state to pay stay-at-home women raising children for doing housework - and include this in their pension calculations.
The Ministry of Sex also has a notion that the state should pay for first dates - up to the value of a whopping £40.
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And public cash should fund wedding nights in hotels for couples up to a value of £208 in the hope this encourages pregnancies.
The bizarre Ministry's plan to boost the birthrate was raised in a petition organised by GlavPR agency, according to Moskvich magazine.
It is not immediately clear who is behind the madcap scheme.
Meanwhile many regions are producing their own plans to encourage couples to have children.
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Female students in Khabarovsk region aged 18 to 23 are to be paid £900 on the birth of a child under a new initiative.
Chelyabinsk is more generous, paying students an unbelievable £8,500 for the birth of their first child.
A regional health minister even demanded that Russians create babies during coffee and lunch breaks in offices and factories in a sex-at-work scheme.
Yevgeny Shestopalov said: “Being very busy at work is not a valid reason, but a lame excuse.
"You can engage in procreation during breaks, because life flies by too quickly."
Moscow are approaching the declining baby rate issue differently however, and are instead intruding into women's sex lives through bizarre intimate questionnaires.
The enquiries about sex and menstruation have been sent to female public sector workers and those refusing to answer are ordered to attend doctors’ appointments.
Here they would be asked the same invasive questions.
Among dozens of personal questions - which are not anonymised - are these:
The personal questions, which are not anonymised, range from asking when the woman started having sex to hormonal contraception and questions surrounding STD's.
Women from state-run cultural institutions in Moscow region were "indignant" over being ordered to provide this data to HR departments.
One victim told Caution News outlet: "We submitted blank [questionnaires], and they told us to write in our full name.
"So we wrote [names], but did not fill out the questionnaires."
But the brave women then got called into the doctors to be asked the same invasive questions.
Separately, in Moscow women have been offered free fertility tests - and so far 20,000 are complete.
Already deputy mayor Anastasia Rakova, a Putin fanatic, has told women the results show they must rush to have babies as soon as possible - in line with Kremlin policies.
The Putin puppet said: "Everyone in the city knows that there is a special test which allows us to establish the fertility level of a woman, her ability to get pregnant.
"The first results based on the [initial] 20,000 batch suggests that, unfortunately, quite a significant number of women of different ages need to abandon all things important to them now - and get on with the main goal, the main goal of any woman, to [get pregnant and] become a mother".
The Kremlin refuses to believe that misery inflicted by Putin’s war and resulting damage to family life and the standard of living is behind a reluctance to start families or have additional children.
Over 600,000 Russian soldiers have been killed or maimed in the war and, on top of this, more than one million mainly younger Russians have emigrated to escape the war.
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This has torn families apart with fathers and husbands yet to return home.
The uncertainties of war are also said to be scaring young couples away from starting a family.
Who are Putin's children?
THE official number of Vlad's offspring is two, according to the Kremlin.
These are a pair of daughters, Maria Vorontsova, 39, and Katerina Tikhonova, 37.
Both come from his previous marriage to ex-first lady Lyudmila Putina.
Their marriage lasted 30 years, spanning Mr Putin's rapid rise to the top of Russia's political system.
Tikhonova started as an acrobatic dancer in her younger years before she went on to spearhead a major new Russian artificial intelligence initiative.
Vorontsova has built a career in medical research, is an expert on dwarfism and married to a Dutch businessman, Jorrit Faassen.
But, independent journalists recently confirmed Putin has a number of other hidden children.
Two sons, Ivan, nine and Vladimir, five, have reportedly grown up with the tyrant and his longterm lover Alina Kabaeva, 41.
They have already confirmed another daughter, Luiza, 21, born from an extra-marital relationship with a cleaner turned millionaire.