Lee Rigby’s mum sets up refuge for grieving families after revealing she struggled to cope after son’s murder
After finding the strength to carry on after her son was murdered by Islamic extremists Lyn Rigby took to helping others
AS the midnight rain lashed against her son’s headstone, Lyn Rigby wept at his grave, ready to end the pain of losing him once and for all.
She had nowhere to turn after soldier Lee was murdered by Islamic extremists. Taking her own life was the “only way to get closer to him”.
But proud Lyn had vowed to never let her boy be forgotten and somehow found the strength to go on.
Inspired by his memory, she and husband Ian, Lee’s stepdad, set up the Lee Rigby Foundation to help other grieving military families.
Today, along with these poignant photos of Lee, printed for the first time, Lyn shows off the amazing work the charity has achieved.
She is preparing to welcome the first guests to Lee Rigby House, a retreat partly funded by the foundation for bereaved military families and war veterans struggling to cope.
Lyn, 50, said: “When I hit rock bottom I wanted to end it all. There was no lifeline or place to run to, so I found myself sitting at my son’s grave at midnight on one of the bleakest winter nights possible.
“I lay on the ground next to his headstone in the pitch black as the wind and rain lashed into me.
“But at that point I didn’t care.
I lay weeping at Lee's grave and wanted to die. In my darkest hour there was no help, no hope
Mum Lyn Rigby on son's death
"I just wanted to be with Lee again and this was the only way I could think of trying to get closer to him.
“I sobbed my heart out all alone in the graveyard, so I know how grim things can get when you are grieving a loved one.
“I wish there had been a retreat or a place I could have gone to at my darkest hour, because this kind of grief is the loneliest and scariest thing in the world.
“You feel like you are going mad and losing control of everything.
"It’s real torture and I hope I can offer some small comfort to others when they are feeling the same way.”
Fusilier Lee was 25 when he was butchered in broad daylight in May 2013 as he walked to his barracks in Woolwich, South East London.
The Sun on Sunday successfully helped campaign to have a permanent memorial to him built there. Now Lyn is taking his legacy further and reaching out to others.
Lyn, from Manchester, said: “I know how horrendous it is to lose a child or loved one. There are days you feel you just can’t carry on.
“When I lost Lee there was no one and nowhere to turn to when I hit my lowest point. That’s why I know how vital this respite centre will be to those who are suffering.
“It’s taken a lot of blood, sweat and tears to reach this point but now I can see the project coming together. I couldn’t be prouder.
“Lee was such a kind and loving lad who always helped others and I know he would be very proud too.
“I also hope I can bring some comfort to the people who come to stay with us.
“My work with the foundation has given me real purpose and a reason to live, just through knowing it will help people like me, who have been dealt the cruellest blows in life.
“I am living proof that you can carry on, however much you are hurting inside.”
The finishing touches are being put on the retreat, with Lee Rigby House — a vital bolthole for two families — opening first, followed by the renovation of chalets, the Lee Rigby Lodges, as more money is raised.
Lyn said it was important military veterans could use the retreat along with relatives of fallen soldiers, as Lee “would want to look after his brothers in arms too”.
As well as being partly funded by the charity, an unlikely helping hand was offered by former wrestling superstar Kendo Nagasaki.
He was so moved by Lyn’s plight and the tragedy of Lee’s killing that he donated the buildings for the retreat, which is nestled into his country estate in Staffordshire.
Kendo commanded up to 14million TV viewers for his fights against the likes of Big Daddy and Giant Haystacks on ITV’s World Of Sport in the Seventies and Eighties.
He was famous for never revealing his face, wrestling in a mask inspired by his Japanese spiritual guide.
Kendo supports worthy causes through his own charity, the Kendo Nagasaki Foundation, and last week sportingly donned his ceremonial wrestling uniform to pose with Lyn and Ian, 58, for photos at the retreat.
Lyn said: “The overwhelming feeling you get here is peace and tranquillity because the estate is so calm and quiet and has acres of rolling countryside for walks and relaxation.
“I can’t thank Kendo enough. Without him, we would not be able to help anyone.
"He is a truly kind and compassionate man.”
Kendo’s support reflects Lee’s character — someone who always put others before himself. Our new photos of Lee capture that spirit.
Other snaps of him with his son Jack, taken shortly before he was killed, reveal his gentle and loving nature, despite having fought hard battles on the plains of Afghanistan.
He never got over losing some of his closest friends from his regiment at war and always tried to help others.
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Lyn said: “Lee was a truly beautiful boy who was loved by everyone who met him.
“There were many different sides to him. He was famous for being a joker but he was also incredibly kind and soft.
“He wasn’t scared to show his feelings or revel in his favourite, soppy Westlife songs.
“He was unique and very special and I miss him every day.
"I still want to run away some days and pretend none of this has happened.
“The nightmare doesn’t stop, you just find different ways to cope with it.
'I feel I am being guided by Lee in my work. His love drives me to do things to help people'
Next Saturday, Lyn holds her first major fundraiser for the foundation, a gala dinner at Manchester United’s Old Trafford stadium.
SAS hero Colin Maclachlan, who is patron of the charity, will be speaking, while United’s Wayne Rooney has pledged boots and memorabilia for an auction to boost funds.
Lyn said: “The dinner is all about raising as much money as possible to complete the buildings.
“There are still seats available on the foundation website and if Sun on Sunday readers want to join us they will be very welcome.”
HOW TO GET INVOLVED
TO support the Lee Rigby Foundation, you can donate at:
Lee is remembered with the Woolwich memorial and his legacy lives on through the charity. Your kindness will help provide a lifeline to those suffering the aftermath of war, including families and soldiers. See the foundation’s Facebook page or follow @leerigbyfdn on Twitter for updates.