Everyone thought our dad was hero firefighter – but behind closed doors he was raping us from when we were six years old
TWO siblings raped by their own father have spoken out about the horrific abuse that "ate us from the inside out".
Vile Brian Doye started raping and sexually abusing his son and daughter when they were six and eight respectively.
To the outside world, Doye was a pillar of the community.
He was a senior firefighter with the London Fire Brigade, planned to stand as a councillor and had put himself forward as a foster carer.
But behind closed doors he was running a "house of horrors".
The abuse on his two children in the 1970s only stopped when they left home aged 16 and 18.
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After they fled his abuse, Gay Melrose and Mark Doye didn't see their monster father again until April this year when they faced him in court.
The pair have waived their right to anonymity after Doye was jailed last month following a trial at Swansea Crown Court.
In 2021, almost five decades after he abused his children, a third victim from south Wales came forward to report Doye for sexual abuse.
From there, police tracked down Gay and Mark, who also decided to report their father for the horrific abuse he had inflicted on them while living in Kent and south-east London.
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They felt "immense guilt" that they did not report it when it was happening.
In a sentencing hearing on May 24, the court heard Doye's offending began in the mid-1970s and continued until the early 2020s.
Doye, 77, was convicted of 27 offences against two girls and a boy and was jailed to 28 years meaning he is likely to die in prison.
'All fathers do this'
His children have waived their right to automatic anonymity to tell their story as they believe there are likely more victims.
When she was just 10 years old, Gay walked in on her father raping Mark while on a family holiday.
He had already been sexually abusing and raping her for two years. Mark was just six years old.
Doye conducted a violent campaign against his children for a decade apiece.
In Gay's case, he would leave notes under her pillow telling her he would visit her that night.
He told her "all fathers do this to their daughters" and threatened to have her killed if she told anybody.
Alongside the sexual abuse, he beat Mark every day.
Sexual abuse by male victims
MARK says he feels especially strongly about waiving his right to anonymity because he believes there is serious under-reporting of sexual abuse by male victims.
Mark said: "It's such a small number of men who come forward having been abused as children. It doesn't feel like you're a man when you say it.
"You get emotional and it's suddenly 'you don't feel like a man' or anything like that."
He hopes by founding a charity and helpline it will also help with the financial burden of attending court as a victim.
Mark added: "The first week of the trial the CPS funded it because obviously we were victims but not the second week and the second week we had to go back to support the other family.
"And then when we had to go back last Friday for the sentencing, they funded the hotel but didn't fund anything for our partners for support.
"So we want to set this up for people who physically can't get there."
'Immense guilt'
Gay, Mark, and the third victim, who remains anonymous for legal reasons, survived the horrific abuse but described how their lives have been completely changed as a result of his abuse.
Gay, 56, who lives in Kent, and Mark, 53, who lives in Cambridgeshire, said the abuse "ate us from the inside out".
They described how the abuse led them to treat their own children differently, with Mark saying it felt "wrong" to bathe and change the nappies of his own children.
Gay said when her daughter was born she found it difficult to let her husband look after her.
Doye's crimes spanned nearly five decades between the three known victims.
Mark, who has two daughters and a step-daughter of his own, said: "We always should've done it [reported it] but didn't do it.
"We have immense guilt that if we had said something earlier another victim wouldn't have happened, or you hope it wouldn't, it was a horrible feeling.
"We decided we had to because he's done it again and he's probably done it lots of times in between.
"We should've done something years ago to stop this happening.
"One of the reasons we want our names out there is because we want to set up a helpline or charity to get people to come out because we buried it and it ate us from the inside out.
"It destroys your life, your mind, your self."
How you can get help
Whenever it happened to you, it’s never too late to get support.
If you’ve ever experienced sexual violence or sexual abuse, you can get confidential support from specialists who will listen to you, believe you and understand how hard it is to talk about.
As a victim, you’re entitled to support whether you report the crime or not.
Your rights are set out in full in the Victims’ Code.
Visit gov.uk/sexualabusesupport to see the support on offer.
Describing the abuse, Mark said: "I think I was probably around 15 when it stopped.
"I've blocked a lot of it out obviously so I don't know how many times it happened."
Abuse was 'a regular thing'
Mark said that while he and Gay were aware in some sense that each was being abused they didn't talk about it to each other, or report it.
With three children of her own and three grandchildren, Gay said she first confided in a friend about what had happened to her ten years ago, after four decades of bottling it up.
Gay said: "I can't remember the grooming but he started to rape me at eight years old.
"Most of our childhood we can't remember, only certain bits."
Gay said the rapes became a "regular" thing and due to her age she was unable to process her emotions.
She continued: "I knew I didn't like it and it felt wrong, and obviously I was in a lot of pain, but I don't think I had any feelings.
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"The first time he did it was on the marital bed."
Even though she was just 10 when she realised her brother was also being abused, she felt she had to take it on herself to protect him.
You're Not Alone
EVERY 90 minutes in the UK a life is lost to suicide
It doesn’t discriminate, touching the lives of people in every corner of society – from the homeless and unemployed to builders and doctors, reality stars and footballers.
It’s the biggest killer of people under the age of 35, more deadly than cancer and car crashes.
And men are three times more likely to take their own life than women.
Yet it’s rarely spoken of, a taboo that threatens to continue its deadly rampage unless we all stop and take notice, now.
That is why The Sun launched the You’re Not Alone campaign.
The aim is that by sharing practical advice, raising awareness and breaking down the barriers people face when talking about their mental health, we can all do our bit to help save lives.
Let’s all vow to ask for help when we need it, and listen out for others… You’re Not Alone.
If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support:
- CALM, , 0800 585 858
- Heads Together,
- HUMEN
- Mind, , 0300 123 3393
- Papyrus,, 0800 068 41 41
- Samaritans,, 116 123