There’s no point the Tories uniting on policies voters don’t want

ANOTHER week, another Tory leadership crisis.

If I had to put money on it, I’d guess we’ll have another of these crises every week until the local elections in May.

Yet the ongoing firestorm of Tory in-fighting, bitter recriminations and back-room plotting won’t end there.

Oh no. That’s when the real shenanigans begin, when the stone-cold reality of predictably dire council results hits where it really hurts.

There may be some Conservatives still optimistically — some might say implaus-ibly — talking up the chances of a Tory revival before an autumn general election, but no one is even bothering to pretend the English council election results will be anything but a horror show.

And we know what happens to Tory leaders who are down in the polls in an election year then face a drubbing in the local elections.

Just ask Theresa May — she lost 1,334 seats in the 2019 local elections and was forced out of No 10 within weeks.

The big question in British politics right now is what will happen when Rishi Sunak oversees a similar defeat in a few weeks’ time, when his party’s divisions become even starker.

The conventional wisdom in Westminster is that divided parties lose elections.

But those wise men and women are the same who predicted the end of two-party politics in 2010, that Remain would win in 2016, in 2019 that Boris Johnson would be a three-term premier and that the Labour Party would take years to recover from its crushing defeat under Jeremy Corbyn.

So much for their sage advice, eh?

I don’t believe that unity is the key at election time.

Sure, voters rightly judge that parties busy fighting internal battles care more about personal rivalries than delivering for the people.

But there’s no point uniting over policies that voters don’t want.

A party that’s unified around a policy to double everyone’s income tax isn’t going to win an election, no matter how much all their MPs nod their heads in unison.

Flatlining growth

After all, the Greens are united in their mission to impoverish our country — sorry, I meant “save the planet” — yet they still don’t win many votes.

And simply changing leader doesn’t deliver unity either.

Penny Mordaunt was put forward as a “stalking horse” candidate but, while she is popular with Tory voters, I don’t think that having great hair and holding a ceremonial sword are necessarily the best qualifications for holding the highest office in the land.

Many in Westminster suspect her name was put about by right-wingers who were hoping to stir up trouble before launching their own bids.

Anyway, the right wing will not unite around Penny Mordaunt — nor Tom Tugendhat.

And the left wing One Nation MPs wouldn’t touch Kemi Badenoch, Suella Braverman or Robert Jenrick with a barge pole.

And, to be honest, it’s highly unlikely the Tory right would unite around one of their own candidates either.

So where does that leave us?

Whoever is in charge of the country, whether it be another Tory or Labour’s Sir Keir Starmer, will be faced with precisely the same issues Rishi Sunak has on his desk every morning — flatlining growth, low productivity, sky-high energy prices, millions on welfare, millions more on NHS waiting lists, the war in Ukraine — the list goes on and on.

What the Tories need, and what the country needs even more, is not a show of unity around any particular leader.

If they can’t unite on policies that will drag Britain out of the doldrums and deliver the growth and opportunity we deserve, then it doesn’t really matter who’s sitting in No 10 this week or next.

Laura knows where real gold is in cycle of life

DAME Laura Kenny, Britain’s most successful female Olympian, has announced her retirement from cycling after winning five Olympic golds and seven World Championship titles.

Laura, who is married to former cyclist Sir Jason Kenny, has decided to leave the track behind and, even better, has been honest about why.

As the mum of two young sons, she says that winning another gold medal wasn’t the dream it used to be, adding: “I really want to stay at home with the children.”

How wonderful to hear a young mum telling some home truths about the joys of motherhood.

I haven’t won any medals but have been lucky to have an amazing, interesting and fulfilling career.

Yet nothing has ever come close to the joy of hearing my daughter say, for the very first time: “I love you, Mummy.”

It's all a fine mess

TRANSPORT Secretary Mark Harper has threatened to strip local councils of their power to fine motorists if they fail to get local residents’ approval for low-traffic neighbourhoods and 20mph zones.

About time too.

Councils close roads to make them more “bike and pedestrian friendly” but most local people never get a say in the schemes, which are really just a cunning way for councils to use drivers as a cash cow, fining them a fortune when they accidently enter an LTN or drive at 23mph.

Who wants these schemes anyway?

I’ve never understood why people who live in city centres are surprised to find lots of traffic on the streets around them.

Or why people who choose to live in the middle of nowhere are cross to discover that there isn’t a bus service every ten minutes.

They must be the same people who move in next door to a pub then complain about the noise at kicking-out time.

Don't be skin deep

VAUGHAN GETHING has been elected Welsh First Minister.

Cue the predictable news headlines about him being “the first black leader” of Wales and, indeed, in the whole of Europe.

But who really cares about that? We’ve had three female PMs (some more successful than others), an Asian PM, Asian and black Cabinet ministers, a Muslim First Minister of Scotland . . . the list goes on.

And that’s precisely because the vast majority of people in this country think skin colour or sex are irrelevant to whether someone can do the job.

We judge people on what they say, what they do and the content of their characters.

It’s old- fashioned but, you never know, might catch on.

Lot of hocus Potus

WE ARE told that Donald Trump has warned of a “bloodbath” if he loses the US presidential election in November.

Speaking at a rally in Ohio, he told the crowd: “Now, if I don’t get elected it’s going to be a bloodbath for the whole . . . country.”

Pretty scary stuff, huh?

Except that anyone bothering to watch the whole clip would know for certain that he wasn’t threatening a violent uprising, but talking about the damage that would be done to the US car industry if cheap Chinese automobiles were allowed to flood the country.

Pretending he said anything else is what the man himself would call “fake news”.

After all, Trump says enough terrible things without having to make stuff up.

I'd love to Skor a dance

STRICTLY Come Dancing professional Giovanni Pernice has faced criticism over his reportedly strict training regimes for his celebrity dance partners.

Amanda Abbington, Ranvir Singh and Laura Whitmore recently met to “compare notes” on their experiences with the “intense perfectionist” dancer, with actress Amanda even claiming to have post-traumatic stress.

Like pretty much every-one without two left feet, I’d love to be invited on to Strictly.

I reckon I could manage a few steps but I’d be useless at the launch show pretending I was happy with my pro dance partner, because there’s only one for me – and, sadly, he’s quit the show.

While every-one else gushes that their dance partner is “the one I was hoping for”, I’d be ruthlessly honest with presenter Tess Daly and say: “I’m gutted. I was hoping for Aljaž Škorjanec.”