Sir Keir Starmer just wants woke nonsense to go away. It won’t
SIR Keir Starmer’s been saying stuff he doesn’t believe, again. He does this quite a lot. I think it must be his hobby.
We all need a hobby – video games, fell walking, spouting b*****ks, whatever.
He is reported to have told his party that the public doesn’t care about “woke” issues.
He thinks the Tories have made a mistake by focusing on them. (I’m glad Sir Keir spotted that, because I haven’t. But that’s another story.)
What Sir Keir’s words mean is that HE doesn’t remotely believe in woke issues.
I hear this a lot from friends in the Labour Party.
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“Oh, you know, Rod, people don’t really care about all that identity politics stuff. You bang on about it, but nobody gives a monkey’s.”
That means actually they don’t remotely agree with the progressive rot that their party has been pushing these past ten years.
But hope that it doesn’t matter to the voter.
Otherwise, they’d defend their policies that claim that people who aren’t ladies actually ARE ladies, despite all the scientific evidence to the contrary.
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They’d defend the cancel culture.
They’d defend the horrible, corrosive racial divide created by Black Lives Matter and promoted by Labour MPs such as Diane Abbott and David Lammy.
But they don’t defend it. Like Sir Keir, they very much wish it would go away. And they pretend the electorate doesn’t care.
But Sir Keir isn’t telling the truth. If he were, he wouldn’t drape himself in the Union Jack every five minutes.
He knows damn well that Jeremy Corbyn’s “woke” loathing of the UK and its history is a major reason people didn’t vote for him in 2019.
And Starmer has done everything he can to reverse the perception of Labour as being the unpatriotic party.
But there’s only so far he can roll back on the woke stuff, because it is embedded deep within the party now. So he is — if I can put it like this — a bit buggered.
All he can do now is hope that people don’t think his inability to identify what a woman is makes him unsuitable for office.
He may be right that in general people do not put jiggery wokery at the top of their political concerns when the pollsters come knocking.
It’s true, too, that they may think the rows over transgenderism are absurd.
Utter absurdity
But they care deeply about “woke” issues when they affect their lives.
They care about their kids being taught obnoxious sex education propaganda at school, for a start.
They deeply object to the notion of “white privilege”.
They object to the denigration of our culture and our history, the trashing of the United Kingdom’s incredible achievements.
They believe very fervently in freedom of speech and worry that there are things which they are simply not allowed to say these days.
They hate the cancel culture.
Only a couple of weeks ago Labour-run Consett Council banned local hero Roy Chubby Brown from appearing in the town because he wasn’t “compatible” with its values.
The truth is, Labour is still up to its necks in idiotic wokery.
Sir Keir knows that and he also knows there’s nowt he can do about it.
Except pretend nobody cares.
Harry’s error is staring him in the face
NOBODY cut a more forlorn figure at the Coronation than Prince Harry.
Relegated to a pew way back from the front and hidden behind Princess Anne’s ludicrous hat.
Nobody of note spoke to him.
And he scooted back to the States and wife Meghan as soon as he possibly could.
I wonder if he is beginning to regret giving up his birthright for that ghastly, self-regarding woman?
If he hasn’t yet, I’m sure he will pretty soon.
Incidentally, what the hell were Ant and Dec doing at the ceremony?
I mean, just why?
Facing uphill struggle just to overtake longer lorries
THE Government has passed new legislation allowing much longer lorries on to our roads.
It has increased the maximum length allowable by more than six feet.
The Government says this will boost the economy by more than a billion quid, cut carbon emissions and bring joy and happiness into the hearts of all human beings, or something.
Well, maybe. But I’ll tell you what else it will do.
It will increase the average length of time it takes one lorry to overtake another on an uphill stretch of the motorway.
The current average is about 20 minutes and the average number of car drivers stuck behind and getting more and more furious is 450.
Failure is run of mill
IN their most important football match in 20 years, Millwall went in at half-time 3-1 up.
The game ended 4-3 to Blackburn Rovers – and my lot were out of the play-offs.
And that’s why I support the Lions. Not for the glory.
But for the moments of sheer, nerve-shredding, unfathom-able catastrophe.
Which occur pretty much every season – but especially when something crucial is at stake.
That and the chicken balti pies you can get at half-time.
A right Royal U-turn
THE coppers have now apologised for arresting members of the anti-monarchy group Republic on Saturday, before the Coronation.
About time. Up until now I just heard self-serving, arrogant policemen justifying their actions.
Republic is a perfectly reasonable organisation which believes we should do away with the monarchy.
There’s a very large section of the public which supports that position (although not me, I should add).
It’s pretty outrageous that its members can be arrested when they’re doing nothing at all except existing.
Do you remember freedom of speech?
We used to have it, once upon a time.
But it’s gone the way of the Aztec Bar and Toast Toppers.
Gimp's got his writhes
AT last, police have arrested a man who they believe is the Somerset Gimp.
This is a bloke dressed in a black latex bodysuit who writhes on the ground in a strange manner, apparently terrifying motorists.
The latest woman who spotted him thought he was a badger.
Police say he’s been detained for being a public nuisance.
But, hell, what’s a gimp to do?
They’re MEANT to writhe on the ground, peculiarly. If he acted normally he wouldn’t be a gimp, would he?
He’d just be a regular Somerset yokel wearing a black rubber suit.
Free The Weston Gimp, I say.
DONALD TRUMP has just lost a civil suit against a woman who says he sexually assaulted her.
Trump is furious, insisting it’s another political attack on him. And that he has never seen the woman before.
Here’s the problem for the Republicans.
The more Trump is subjected to this sort of stuff, the stronger his support becomes.
And the more likely it is that he’ll be running on the Republican ticket at the next election.
And so the more likely it is that the Republicans will lose – again.
Not fit for job
THE best news to come out of last week’s local election results was the defeat of Tory Ben Fitter-Harding in Canterbury.
He was the leader of the council. And now he’s nowt.
Fitter-Harding tried to impose a bizarre road plan on the locals.
It meant they couldn’t drive to their local supermarkets, or to work.
They had to take a ring road – meaning much longer journeys.
The same kind of plans are being adopted by quite a few councils.
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They ought to have a look at the fate of Mr Ben: Safe seat – but evicted.
Democracy does work, sometimes.