Gay footballer reveals he’s too scared to come out & begs Premier League chiefs for help
A SECOND gay footballer today reveals he is too frightened to come out - and urges Premier League bosses to do more to help tormented stars.
In an open letter – sent via the Justin Fashanu Foundation – the top-flight player says he fears the game has not “moved on” enough to accept him.
He tells how he has told some team-mates about his sexuality but that living a secret life has damaged his mental health.
And he claims game bosses are only paying “lip service” to the issue.
Heartbreakingly, the star says that it has been “virtually impossible” to forge relationships due to his secret life.
We reveal the star’s letter today after another Premier League ace penned a note outlining his struggles which we published in July.
Activist Amal Fashanu – who runs the foundation and is the niece of Justin Fashanu – released the letter to us after helping the player and other stars.
Amal, 30, said the second player felt he had a “weight lifted off his shoulders” after the first player’s letter received a positive reaction.
She added: “He was relieved in a way that the first letter came out and it was sympathetically received.
“He felt that lifted a weight off his shoulders and it is good that many attitudes have changed.
“I hope to put the two players in touch so they can discuss their situations and what they are going through.”
In the letter, the anonymous star also reveals he would like to meet the footballer who wrote the first letter through the foundation.
He adds: “The reality is that we are two of many players in the Premier League who are gay.”
The first footballer had said in his open letter that he felt “trapped” and that leading a secret life was an “absolute nightmare”
The foundation has launched a partnership with Championship club Norwich – one of the teams Amal’s uncle Justin played for before his tragic suicide aged 37 in 1998.
Norwich will aid in the foundation’s campaign to fight against homophobia and racism in the game, and to raise mental health awareness.
But Amal wants Premier League bosses to do more.
She said: “They remain very quiet on this issue and seem to not want to stir things up.
“They’re trying to tackle racism and their energy is focused on that, although there is arguably a bigger problem with homophobia in football.”
There are currently no openly gay or bisexual male professional footballers in the UK.
Former Hull City youth player Thomas Beattie ‘came out’ in June and became the first British player to do so since Justin Fashanu in 1990.
German ex-Aston Villa and West Ham star Thomas Hitzleperger revealed he was gay after retiring in 2014.
Watford striker Troy Deeney has said he believes every team has one gay or bisexual player – and backed them to come out.
He added: “Once the first comes out, there will be loads.”
A Premier League spokesman said: “The Premier League remains committed to supporting any player who wants to come out.
“Premier League football is open to everyone and we and our clubs continue to work together to create safe and welcoming environments for all of our fans, players and employees.
“Through our long-standing partnership with Stonewall we continue to celebrate and promote LGBT inclusion and have worked together to improve policies and practices.
“Our clubs work hard to promote equality and diversity in everything they do, from the atmosphere and experience in their stadiums to the many projects they run in their communities.”
A spokesperson for LGBT rights group Stonewall said: “For a positive shift to happen, it’s vital that allies come out in support of LGBT equality.
“The more visible support there is, the more confident athletes will feel about being supported and accepted for who they are.
“That’s why our Rainbow Laces campaign focuses on getting more people to be visible and fierce supporters of LGBT equality in sport.
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“The Premier League have stepped up and demonstrated how committed they are to building LGBT-inclusive sporting environments.
"We have been working closely with them on a longstanding partnership to ensure everyone can enjoy football and to create spaces where players, coaches, fans and staff are accepted without exception.
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"Our work won’t be finished until all LGBT people, from fans to players alike, are accepted without exception.”
The player writes
There have only been two things I have been certain of in my life.
One is that I’ve always wanted to be a footballer. The second is that I’m gay. I’ve known since the age of 14 but even then, as a teenager, I knew the two things could not go hand in hand.
So I stayed quiet for years. Playing football helped massively.
It was a release from the mental strain of having to keep my sexuality a secret.
But over time I have been able to become more open about my feelings and how I want to live my life off the pitch.
I’ve come out to my parents, to close members of my family and to my friends.
That was a massive step for me and ever since I was able to do that things have become a hell of a lot easier.
Having their love and support was also one of the main reasons I was also able to tell some of my team-mates recently.
Bizarrely I wasn’t actually that worried about what their reaction would be. I think deep down they knew but were waiting for me to feel the time was right. Football teams and football clubs - whatever level you are playing at - are incredibly close knit.
I knew telling my team-mates was like telling a member of my family.
And I know that my secret will be safe with them until the moment I may eventually feel the time is right to speak in public about my feelings.
It’s so sad for me to say this, but even though society has moved on massively since I was a teenager the game simply hasn’t.
Those running it need to put more measures in place so that gay players know they will get the support they need.
Right now the powers that be are only playing lip service to the issue.
It helps to know I am not alone.
When I read the letter released by the Amal Fashanu Foundation earlier this year so much of what my fellow player said resonated with me and the way I feel.
Living a secret for years has had a massive impact on my mental health.
And forming relationships is virtually impossible for me too.
Reading that letter really affected me and I have been in regular contact with the Justin Fashanu Foundation ever since.
In the near future I am hoping to meet with the player. The reality is that we are two of many players in the Premier League who are gay.
Knowing I am not on my own and that I have the Foundation’s support makes living like this a little easier.
But it obviously shouldn’t be that way.
And those running football need to step up and help bring about change.
· For more information on the foundation visit
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