I drove Porsche’s Dakar 911 – silly paint jobs aside this was one of the most fun days I’ve had behind the wheel

THEY say money can’t buy taste.

That’s never truer than when it comes to cars.

Just because you’ve spent £250k on a Lamborghini it doesn’t mean you won’t look a tool in it if you wrap it in a Louis Vuitton print.

No one wants to be that bloke in his fifties smoking around in a blue and gold 555-spec Subaru Impreza.

Even when buying a Porsche, arguably the coolest brand in the world, it’s too easy to get it wrong.

This is the Porsche 911 Dakar.

Some of you might remember Porsche winning the 1984 Paris-Dakar Rally in the familiar colours of Rothmans.

So to pay tribute to that without promoting cigarettes, Porsche has developed something called the “Roughroads” livery — and it spoils what otherwise is a brilliant car.

By the way, it costs another £18,434 for the paint job, on top of the £173,000 base price for this limited-run model.

Yep, more than a brand new Vauxhall Corsa.

One of my most fun days behind wheel

But it hasn’t stopped 70 per cent of buyers ordering a 911 Dakar in the hero colour, below. Most likely to be kept as an investment in an air-conditioned garage, never turning a wheel.

Nevertheless, I think it looks naff.

That’s why I asked to drive this white one in the calmer 1971 Safari Rally trim. The car looks even better plain.

Silly paint jobs aside, this was one of the most fun days I’ve had behind the wheel for a long time.

Just point the car at the biggest sand dune you can find, give it full beans, and go surfing.

Crest that dune and then go again. And again. And again. In a 480hp sports car. In the Sahara Desert. What a day.

We all know a 911 GT3 RS is the ultimate track day toy — well, this is for people who want to go beyond track limits. People who prefer dirt, sand, gravel, ice — and armfuls of opposite lock.

So, what is a 911 Dakar exactly?

It’s basically a very special 911 GTS. Same 3-litre flat-six boxer engine, eight-speed PDK and all-wheel drive, but with tricked-up suspension, cooling and tyres, and retuned steering and wheel-slip control.

The usual hydraulic front-lift system was added to all four corners so the 911 Dakar rides 8cm higher than a standard GTS in “Offroad” mode, up to 105mph.

That’s also good for rocky trails because it gives you the same ground clearance and ramp angle as a Cayenne SUV. Which is impressive.

Other things to note. The lightweight CFRP bonnet, glass and battery are lifted from a GT3 car. The radiators and fan from a Turbo S. The skid plates and wheel arch protection are obviously bespoke.

You can also order a Porsche roof rack with LED lights, a roof tent, petrol cans and a shovel to dig yourself out should things go wrong.

Also, the wheels are smaller than a GTS — 19in front, 20in rear — to allow for the chunky sidewall on the Pirelli Scorpion tyres.

The cabin is typical top-notch 911. Beautifully appointed. The bucket seats are surprisingly comfy. But I do have a grumble.

There are no GRAB HANDLES.

Go off-road with a passenger and they’ll get thrown about like a rag doll.

Porsche has built a no-limits sports car, which is incredible, but they have forgotten the most basic thing.

Delete the £18k paint job, add some £5 grab handles, and you’ve got my perfect Porsche.