I’m a car expert – what your car really says about your personality & why you should avoid a silver motor

Bright cars make for a bright, bold, confident personality. 

Modifications

The modified car scene is huge, but it is also highly subjective.

Some modifications might fire up while leaving everyone else with a quizzical look on their face.

Cheap mods, stickers, stupid exhausts on 1.0 cars and body bits (unless something premium) are all pretty rubbish.

Lower it, but don't slam it into the weeds, and fit some nice wheels and you'll be a driver of taste and distinction.

Put stickers and neon lights on it, and nobody will talk to you. 

Model

You might have had a particular brand in the family for years, you might have seen a good deal on them, or you might have been told about them by someone who knows nothing about cars.

When it comes to new cars, there is no such thing as a bad one.

So from the driver's seat, you'll be fine no matter what you buy.

However, if you go out of your way to buy a Honda Jazz - which is a perfectly good car, by the way - nobody will invite you to parties.

If you buy a classic Mercedes-Benz, or even an 1980s BMW 3 Series however, or even a Ford Focus, it'll be a different story. 

Condition

You can tell a lot about a person by the condition of their car.

Keeping it looking nice is no hardship.

Most supermarkets have a car wash, every high street seems to have a hand wash.

Wash your car, keep it clean. It shows you're a conscientious person.

If your wheels are shaped more like a 50p coin after hitting the curb six thousand times, it shows you don't care.

The same goes for damage. A cracked light, dings and dents, so on and so forth.

A car is a joyous thing to own, so look after it.

If something broke in your house, you would get it fixed, so why should your car be any different?

Plus, more people see your car than your house.

If your car is scruffy, they're going to think you're scruffy. And you're not... are you? 

Accessories

Now, don't confuse these with modifications.

Mods are for people who are into cars, even if their additions are questionable.

When I say accessories, I mean the stuff that's bought by people who don't know one end of the car from the other because they think said accessories are 'cute' or, heaven forbid, 'funny'. Groan.

Car eyelashes should be punishable with prison time.

Baby on board sticker? Nobody cares.

Stickers with 'amusing' slogans like 'black box fitted, sorry I'm slow' or worst of all, extra badges and numbers that have nothing to do with the car are all automotive sins.

They say you think you're hilarious, but are in fact about as funny as a fart in a lift. 

Number Plates

This is a huge one for me.

None of my cars have their factory plates. Instead, they all have new, clean and crisp legal style plates.

These awful '4D' plates that look like they're made of LEGO do not make you look cool.

The same goes for mis-spaced plates or plates with screws/fasteners moved to make a 0 look like an 8 or something.

Private plates are fine, but if you have to alter the spacing or the fixings to make it say what you want it to, you're breaking the law. Plain and simple. 

Chris works for Car & Classic. Launched in 2005, Car & Classic is Europe’s number one classic and niche vehicle website with circa 4m monthly visitors.

With over 40,000 cars listed at any one point through private and trade enthusiast sales portal, Car & Classic also runs a stand-alone auction site, which was launched in July 2020.