Anorexic teen who survived on just a BAGEL a day and weighed four stone at one point shows her incredible recovery photos on Instagram
Hollie tried to limit her calorie intake to just 250 a day
A TEENAGER who survived on just one bagel a day while suffering from anorexia has spoken out about her journey to recovery.
Hollie Faye Cullen, known as Faye, has struggled with the eating disorder since she was 14-years-old.
At her lowest weight Faye, now 18, weighed just four stone and would limit herself to no more than 250 calories a day.
The graphic design and media communications student initially wanted to slim down, but she lost control.
Faye, who lives in London, said: "I just wanted to lose weight and this later became my way of coping with life.
";I honestly hated myself more than ever and hated what I was doing.
"I knew I was destroying my life, my future and everyone around me.
"I wanted to stop but I just couldn't bear the idea of letting go of anorexia for a long time, it was like I needed it.
"I'd wake up wishing I was dead."
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During her worst eating disorder relapse Faye drank only cups of tea for five days and would even limited herself to six of those a day.
She also had a month where she ate nothing more than a bagel a day.
Faye added: "I was below a size 4 in clothing and could find nothing to fit me.
"My eating disorder made my life a living hell.
"It took everything from me, my morals, dignity, self love and future.
"I've been in and out of hospital multiple times with it and other mental health problems such as post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, anxiety, self harm and multiple suicide attempts.
"It's changed my life and everyone's around me."
However despite her eating disorder Faye was determined to follow her dreams and move from Devon so she could go to university in London.
It was this determination, as well as support from her mum, that put her on the road to recovery.
She said: "My mum stood by my side the entire illness, despite not living at home and provided me support 24/7 matter how many times I threw it back in her face, because of the illness.
"She put up with so much and encouraged me (and still does) to keep fighting and living.
"I remember when I was in a really dark place her telling me she wanted to get me through the illness by being my best friend.
"I told her it wasn't going to work but it did.
"My other reason to recovery was for my passion to continue my education as it had been taken away from my due to other illnesses as a child.
"I was determined to move to London and go to university no matter what."
In a bid to help her recovery Faye set up an Instagram account under the alias Faye, a name which has since stuck.
She posted about her journey to recovery on her Instagram account, which she named "Freeing Faye".
She said: "The reason I started Freeing Faye was because I was suddenly desperate to find a way of recovery.
"I'd been searching the internet for ideas, tips and treatments when I stumbled across the eating disorder community on Instagram.
"Initially when I started the account I wasn't that serious about it or recovery, it was a half-hearted attempt.
"It wasn't until I was turned away from a specialised eating disorder service for 'being too ill' for treatment that I realised I needed to take matters into my own hands and use that as a tool for fighting."
Faye found the more she used Instagram the more support she got and so could in turn give to others.
She added: "I decided to make it my mission to show people that, 'Yeah, recovery is worth it,' even if it is god damn b***** hard.
"You have to choose recovery every single day.
"Recovery isn't just about food either and I wanted to show that aspect of things."
Faye would like more to be done to support people with eating disorders, and she is especially unhappy about being turned away when she wanted help.
She explained: "The treatment I have received has been absolutely horrendous and has never treated my disorder.
"It's always been down to me and my family to sort me out.
"To be turned away from services after being on a two-month waiting list for being 'too ill' is ridiculous.
"Of course I'm going to be too ill after waiting that long for help.
"I think there definitely needs to be a lot more support and awareness out there for eating disorders."
Now Faye has got into fitness as she's more interested in being strong than skinny.
But she's found a more interesting way to pack on the muscle than simply lifting weights.
“I've been doing pole dance for over a year and a half now, it'll be two years in January," she said.
“Pole has definitely really helped with overcoming my eating disorder multiple times.
“When I initially started pole I was bordering a relapse with anorexia as my self esteem and body confidence was so low. I had just come out of a rocky relationship and I wanted to do something for me that would bring my body confidence back up, something to prove all the negativity wrong.
“I went to my first session in a studio filled with women of all shapes and sizes, young and old. It showed me it really didn't matter what size you were or how old, body confidence was what made you actually beautiful.
“The belief in yourself and being able to walk into a room like, 'Yeah, this is me and my body,' no matter how you look really stood out to me.
"I went to a few sessions and shortly after bought my own pole, which I named Murtle, and just taught myself by watching YouTube and Instagram videos.
“With that my love for pole grew rapidly. When I became to unwell with anorexia for pole dance, it killed me and made every part of the situation so much worse as there was suddenly nowhere I could let out how I was feeling.
“Pole dance had become such a release of emotions for me that I didn't really not what to do without it.
“I still remember my first time getting back on the pole in recovery, I remember how it felt everyday as my body got stronger the more I could dance. It was really incredible and kept encouraging me to eat. Strong was my new skinny.”
New NHS guidelines order GPs to act immediately if they suspect a patient may have an eating disorder rather than waiting to observe physical signs.