The rise of fitspo mums who flaunt their post-baby bodies online to ‘inspire women’ – and get slammed for fat-shaming
With their six-packs and baby-defying bodies, #fitspo mums may be a growing phenomenon on social media – but they’re also facing serious criticism
CASUALLY scrolling through the comments below the Instagram image she’d recently posted, mum-of-one Abby Pell suddenly felt sick.
“This is fat-shaming, pure and simple,” wrote one commentator.
“Exploiting your motherhood to show off is despicable and shameless.”
Another declared: “It’s nice to be toned, but to have such man legs and that stomach is not attractive.”
The reason for the vitriol?
Abby had posted a picture of her lifting up her T-shirt with her daughter Bella, now eight, pointing at her rock-hard abs, alongside the message: “I have a kid, a six pack and no excuse.”
Welcome to the dark side of being a “fitspo mum”, the workout phenomenon currently taking social media by storm.
These mothers have swapped dummies for dumb-bells and are on a mission to prove that having a baby – or three – is no barrier to achieving the perfect body.
And Instagram’s picture-based format – more than 80 million images are uploaded every day – is the ideal place to showcase it.
Cue images of sculpted stomachs, toned thighs and bums so perfectly formed they’d have J.Lo weeping into her pillow.
The trend, which started in the US and Australia, is now seeing increasing numbers of UK fitspo mums.
And they’re gaining thousands of female followers, thanks to more women shunning conventional and celebrity fitness trainers in favour of what they see as more relatable diet and workout advice.
But while the fitspo brigade insist their “felfies” (AKA fitness selfies) are there to inspire other mothers, critics are arguing that they pile too much pressure on women to turn their mum-tums into muscle, resulting in many feeling depressed about their bodies.
Brunel University recently conducted a study that found gym bunnies who post about their fitness routine on Facebook are more likely to score high on narcissistic personality traits, and that their real motivation appears to be a need for attention and validation.
It’s a damning indictment, and chartered health psychologist Susan Marchant-Haycox agrees there could be some truth in these findings.
“Posting fitness pictures of yourself on social media is a form of exhibitionism, because you are actively inviting other people to comment on your appearance,” she explains.
“What’s interesting are the possible reasons behind it. While some fitspo mothers genuinely feel they are trying to help people, for others, it could mask insecurities and a lack of self-esteem, which is why they’re boosted by the approval of strangers.
“Body image is a very sensitive issue and there’s no doubt these types of pictures could have a negative effect on women who are struggling with their post-baby shape, which can eventually lead to resentment.”
For Abby, 35, from Sussex, the furore in January last year over her Instagram post came as a shock.
“I never expected to be attacked,” says the single mum who, under the name @Superabs has amassed more than 50,000 followers.
“I’d always enjoyed positive feedback, and suddenly people wanted to tear me down when all I was trying to do was inspire. I knew I’d done it for the right reasons.
“People assume I’m in the gym all the time, so don’t look after my child, which isn’t true. I run my own nutrition business and although I work out five days a week, it’s never more than 90 minutes a day. Trolls pulled my body apart, and I got comments such as: ‘Muscles on a girl are gross’. But more people compliment me, so I refuse to take it to heart.”
Despite having a figure seemingly unaffected by pregnancy, Abby is at pains to stress that she can relate to anyone being unhappy with their post-baby body.
“I was a size 8-10 before I had Bella in 2008, but then went from 9st to 12st when I was pregnant,” she explains.
“After having Bella, my weight settled at 101/2st and a size 12. I knew it was natural to put on weight after having a baby, but I didn’t feel comfortable being bigger.
“A couple of years later, I started going to the gym two or three times a week. The more I threw myself into it, the more I enjoyed it and I slowly got back to 9st.”
Abby loved it so much that she entered her first national fitness competition in 2013, coming third.
She began to post fitness pics and her followers rocketed from 6,000 to 30,000 within months.
“I’d post workout pictures and people began to ask what I ate and how I trained. I realised my advice could be really helpful to some,” she says. “A lot of women think they can’t get back in shape after having children. I wanted to show that it is possible.”
Susan believes much of the popularity of fitness mums stems from the fact they can act as a “therapeutic service” at what can be a very challenging time for new mothers.
“They create a social support system that allows women to discuss their body, something they may be reluctant to talk to anyone else about,” she explains.
“It’s comforting to know this person has also been through childbirth and you think that, if you follow their advice, perhaps you’ll also end up looking like them.”
And while there’s no doubt many new mums are motivated by the fitspo brigade, it can lead to reduced self-confidence, as Hayley Lewis, 35, found out after turning to Instagram for inspiration following the birth of her son Dylan, now three.
“I was a size 8-10 and put on 3st during pregnancy,” she recalls.
“More than a year after Dylan’s birth, I was still a stone heavier and a size 12-14. Desperate to lose weight, I joined Instagram and became obsessed with fit mums. I thought if they could look that good after having a baby, so could I.”
Hayley, a luxury jewellery sales advisor from Fakenham, Norfolk, decided she would do whatever it took to drop her excess pounds.
“I literally wouldn’t eat a thing all day and would ‘save’ my calories for a glass of wine in the evening to unwind after putting Dylan to bed,” she admits.
“I thought that by cutting my food intake so drastically, I would shed weight quicker. But as soon as I had a drink, I’d lose my willpower and end up scoffing a packet of crisps, followed by another.
“I’d feel bad and promise myself I’d eat better the next day, but I never did. I also joined a gym, but only managed to go twice in one year because after looking after Dylan all day I was emotionally and physically drained.”
Within weeks, Hayley felt increasingly frustrated by her lack of progress.
“I’d beat myself up about why I couldn’t have the same self-discipline fit mothers had,” she remembers.
“Fitness mums say they’re trying to help, but they’re putting a lot of pressure on others to get the perfect figure. There’s an implication that if you don’t achieve it, you’re simply lazy. It’s hard enough being a mum. I don’t understand how they find the time.”
Despite reassurances from her husband Mark, a 43-year-old removals manager, Hayley’s confidence dipped and it took a toll on their marriage.
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“I became more body-conscious and, when we had sex, I’d insist the lights were off. We’d argue about the simplest things, such as Mark suggesting we have a takeaway. I’d accuse him of trying to ruin my diet or, if I did give in and have one, I’d blame him the next day. Mark was always treading on eggshells.”
Finally, this summer, an exasperated Hayley gave up her efforts to resemble her workout heroines.
“I felt their look was unattainable and that it was making me feel worse about myself,” she says.
“Actually, most people wouldn’t class me as overweight, but looking at fitspo mums made me feel obese and really knocked my confidence.”
While Hayley still looks at the pictures on Instagram, she tries not to get obsessive about it.
“I’m trying hard to lose weight by eating healthily – not because I feel under pressure from the fitspo mums. I’m just glad I saw sense in the end.”
[boxout headline="‘Critics think I have a team to help’" featured-image="2349215" intro="Simone Gately, 35, is a stay-at-home mum to her five children Summer, 10, Chester, eight, Blossom, six, India, five, and Minnie, three. She lives near Leeds
with husband Paul, 45, a professor in exercise and obesity. She says:"]“I was always active as a child, and ended up doing a degree in sports science. But when I had Summer,
in 2006, I went from
a size 8 to a 14 and weighed 14st. It
really upset me.
Knowing I was getting married in eight months’ time spurred me on to
lose the weight, so
I went on lots of pram walks and ate really healthily. In just three months, I’d shed 3st.
I ended up following this pattern after
every pregnancy.
These days, I get up at 5am and run seven miles. As I have my youngest with me during the day, after we’ve done playgroup, I’ll take her on a long walk in her pushchair before picking up the other kids from school.
When my husband comes home and the children are in bed,
I usually go out for another hour-long walk, then we have dinner together. I must admit it was pretty tiring when I first started, but the more
I worked out, the
more energised I felt.
I joined Instagram in June this year as @Simonegatelyfitmum5, initially posting holiday photos. But I started sharing workout pics to support other women struggling with body confidence, like I had after having a baby.
My followers soon
shot up to thousands and both women and men began asking me questions. I love the fact I’m able to help, and reply to everyone who gets in contact.
I now have more than 15,000 followers.
Critics assume I have a team of people to help me, but I don’t have a nanny, cleaner or gym membership.
It’s unfair when fitspo mums are given a hard time. Most of us just want to help other women be happier and healthier.”[/boxout]
Check out three mums' candid account of their post-baby body journey and this woman's account of 'post-baby reality'.
Abby Pell is an ambassador for MyProtein.