Transgender man jokes about ‘losing his virginity’ again after having a penis constructed from his forearm
Jay knew he was "different", but it took decades for him to complete his transition
A transgender man joked about losing his virginity again after gaining a penis and completing his gender transition to become a man.
Jay Murray, 41, was born a woman, but even as a child he knew there was something “different” about him compared to the other girls in his class.
Things only started making sense for Jay at the age of 19, when his then-boyfriend suggested that he should watch a TV programme about being transgender.
However, he remained trapped in a female body until he was 33, when he received the right help and guidance to start his transition towards being a man.
And now he feels complete – thanks to a series of surgical procedures including a hysterectomy to cut out his womb, the removal of his DD boobs and a phalloplasty - surgery to construct a penis.
Jay, from Bournemouth, said: “On reflection, I have known since I was five that I was different from the other girls.
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"Starting my testosterone injections in March 2009 was one of the most amazing days of my life, knowing I was soon going to be happy in myself.
"I felt nervous and excited to have all of my surgery, I couldn't believe it was actually happening, getting the right bits in the right places.
"I felt I was in a grey area before, but now everything is black and white."
Jay, who volunteers for LGBT youth charities, said he felt like a stranger in the skin of the young blonde girl he once was.
However, he always played on the boy’s football team when he was at school since his teachers gave him “the benefit of the doubt.”
And his parents, who are both psychiatric nurses, helped him as much as they could, letting him play with whatever toys he wanted to and accepting his new identity.
I have known since I was five that I was different from the other girls
Jay Murray
But even with his understanding parents on board, things weren’t always easy for Jay, who is currently single.
He said: “I can still remember when my mum would tell me to put my t-shirt back on when I was about eight, and I'd be mortified.
"At that time I was hanging out with young lads all the time and they always walked around topless. I didn't understand why I couldn't too."
He took up sports, including football, tennis and archery to distract himself, and his athleticism prevented him from getting picked on as a kid.
When he started at a girls’ grammar school aged 12, the differences between him and his female peers became more pronounced.
Reflecting on what school life was like, he said: "My mum Barbara Murray made me grow my hair long and I hated it. I despised wearing dresses. I've only worn a dress about 12 times in my whole life.
"I started my periods at 13 and felt it shouldn't be happening."
Aged 19, Jay got himself a boyfriend just to fit in, before coming out as a lesbian aged 22.
However, this didn’t end Jay’s misery, and he continued on until he was 28, when he was referred to a psychotherapist by his GP.
But all the therapist did was advise him to do breathing exercises and tell him that his issues were all in his head.
It wasn’t until 2007, when he was 33, when he was truly understood by a psychologist, leading to him beginning his gender transition two years later with testosterone injections.
He said: "I was finally fixing myself to how I should be and matching up my brain and body.
"My periods stopped within 12 weeks, my voice started to break and body hair began growing - along with my confidence."
In 2010, Jay had surgery to remove his DD breasts at the Salisbury District Hospital in Wiltshire and lost 6lbs in weight.
He continued: "For the first time in my life I was standing up straight, it felt amazing.
"I had hated my chest, that's what 'outs you.'
"I felt so free I went out topless in town straight away."
By 2013, his womb had been removed and he had completed surgery to construct a penis, using skin from his forearm.
He said: "It was a big decision because once you start there's no going back so I really made sure I was ready.
"Suddenly I had something in my pants and had to buy supportive underpants.
"I finally feel complete and happy and the first time I had sex after becoming a 'virgin' again was amazing.
"You have to relearn about yourself and I will always be evolving into this being."