The four signs a loved one is battling a hidden addiction – and how to help
CARING for a heavy drinker is tough. But by encouraging them to seek support, you can improve their health and your own.
The NHS says addiction is “not having control over doing, taking or using something to the point where it could be harmful to you”.
Commonly associated with gambling, drugs, alcohol and smoking, it is possible to be addicted to “just about anything”. Signs of addiction include:
- Often feeling the need to drink or take drugs.
- Getting into trouble because of drinking or drug-taking.
- Others notice how much you are drinking or taking drugs, and warn you.
- Your drinking or drug use is causing you problems.
Andrew Misell of has these tips on how to talk to them . . .
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READY, SET...
“PLAN what you’re going to say first,” says Andrew. Going into a conversation blindly could leave you both upset and frustrated and may make it more difficult to speak openly with one another again.
Take your time and, if it helps you focus and be clear, take notes.
NO BLAME
YOU may be nervous but be honest without turning the chat into a confrontation. “Try not to criticise or blame,” Andrew says.
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“Talk with empathy about their drinking and the effect it has on you.”
RIGHT TIME
AVOID trying to have the conversation when the other person is drinking or feeling hungover.
Pick a time when they are sober and so more likely to listen to you. If the conversation gets a little heated, accept that it is maybe not the right time and try again later.
GP MOT
REMEMBER the NHS is always there to support you and your loved one. “Encourage them to book in for a check-up with their GP,” says Andrew.
Their doctor can assess the person’s drinking and talk to them about recommended limits and treatment options.
TAKE CARE
IT is OK to help look after them. “Encourage them to drink plenty of water so they do not become dehydrated and to eat regularly, especially before they start to drink,” says Andrew.
“Make sure they are not putting themselves and others at risk by drink-driving.”
FEEL HOPE
TRY not to despair, and take the small wins as and when you can. “Remain positive about their ability to change, and offer praise for any small alterations they are able to make,” says Andrew.
We all appreciate positive feedback and this will make them feel supported.
SELF CARE
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“ IF you are affected by someone else’s drinking, it’s important to know you are not alone and there is support available,” says Andrew.
“There are also organisations that offer help and advice specifically for family members.” See alcoholchange.org.uk for more info.