Woman reveals ‘cheeky’ mother-in-law still sends birthday and Christmas ‘wish lists’ for £100 gifts – and gets upset if she ignores it
MANY people would feel that, as an adult, being able to demand particular, pricey presents from your family is no longer really an option.
However, one mum has revealed how her mother-in-law still sends a birthday and Christmas "wish list" featuring gifts as much as £100.
The Mumsnet user asked whether her husband's mother was being "cheeky" and if they could ignore the "grabby" requests.
In a titled 'to think adult birthday wishlists are grabby and cheeky?', the woman's daughter-in-law added that she gets upset if they don't buy from it.
She wrote: "My mother-in-law sends a wishlist for her birthday and Christmas every year.
"Nothing is cheap, nothing below 60 pounds, some of the items are 80 to 100 pounds. I thought mainly children did this.
When we don't get something from her wishlist she has a very disappointed look on her face after she opens the present.
Mumsnet user
"Do you have any adults who send gift wishlists to you for their birthdays and Christmas?
"Am I being unreasonable to think it's grabby and cheeky to send a wishlist if you are not asked for one?
"Is it unreasonable for me and darling husband to not get something on her wishlist?
"When we don't get something from her wishlist she has a very disappointed look on her face after she opens the present."
The mum added: "Mother-in-law is quite well off. Her and father-in-law have four properties between them and mortgage paid off etc.
"We live in a small house and have a lot more expenses due to childcare expenses and mortgage etc, so things are certainly tighter for us.
"£60-80 for both birthdays and Christmas plus all the other adults in family to buy for makes it quite expensive. She and father-in-law don't spend that much on me."
Her fellow Mumsnet users insisted she wasn't being remotely unreasonable.
One person wrote: "I’ve never heard of this from an adult!"
If she wants specific stuff, she should buy it herself. If she can’t afford it, then she shouldn’t expect others to be able to either.
Fellow Mumsnet user
Another commented: "I think it's ok for an adult to send a wish list BUT only if somebody else wants to buy them a present, doesn't know what to get and has asked for ideas.
"Otherwise it comes across as very grabby."
A third shared: "You have to be brave and say to in-laws that you will no longer be buying gifts for adults at Christmas and don't want people to buy for you either.
"It doesn't matter whether they agree or not - no one has a right to spend your money for you."
And a fourth added: "I grew out of expecting birthday presents from anyone by the time I was about 18!
"If she wants specific stuff, she should buy it herself. If she can’t afford it, then she shouldn’t expect others to be able to either."
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