Peta Todd on whether nature or nurture impacts our children most

I HAVE four children and, funnily enough, they all resemble each other.

Yes, that is nature – it’s in their DNA. But when it comes to their personalities, things are surely a bit more complicated.

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I often look at my gaggle of little humans and ponder the age-old question of nature versus nurture.

There are certainly traits in them that mirror mine or Mark’s. But I would be hard pushed to pin down if they were inevitable because they share our DNA or if they have picked up on our behaviours.

Our girl Delilah is seven. She is fiercely competitive and very driven – something every man and his dog comments on, saying: “Well, we know where she gets that from.”

As Mark is a professional cyclist, they say this with an affectionate roll of their eyes, insinuating that she gets these traits from him, the athlete and born winner.

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Her competitive streak couldn’t possibly be from me, being just a mum . . . could it?

But the truth is I too am extremely competitive and always have been.

So the two of us combined was sure to have this effect somewhere along the line.

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Delilah loves sport and is naturally pretty athletic. But it’s a big part of our lives, so I guess she could have learned that from us.

The biggest conundrum of our four children is Casper, who is 15 months old. He is obsessed with cycling and bikes! It’s the one thing that can calm him when he is sad or excite him to euphoric levels. He could move himself on a balance bike before he could walk and cartoons don’t register to him – only bike races.

He watches Mark get ready to train every day with steely concentration and intent. How Daddy puts on his shoes and helmet fascinates him.

So is this cycling coursing through his veins or has he just learnt this?

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If it is learnt, why aren’t all his siblings the same? If anything, he has been around racing the least because he is the youngest.

There are loads of examples where a talent in a particular sport has been passed down the line – Peter Schmeichel and his son Kasper, both football goalkeepers; or boxers Chris Eubank and his son Chris Jr.

There must be something to be said for the sport and the talent being in their genes.

I parent all our kids the same. They have the same support, opportunities and social settings.

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So if it was all about nurture, surely they would all have the same interests and talents?

I love how we can pick out which traits have come from which parent.

I find myself excusing the traits I recognise in myself – such as Delilah’s clumsiness and Finnbar’s tendency to worry.

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But personality quirks straight from Mark I am less likely to make exceptions for – such as Frey’s tendency to ignore people who don’t hold his interest and Delilah’s inability to take losing.

So I’m not certain if nature or nurture wins.

But I’d put money on Casper following in his daddy’s slipstream.

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