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THERE’s a confidence about Helen Flanagan that often comes hand in hand with baby number two.
There are none of the new-mum worries she had first time round, and she’s no longer remotely bothered about the opinions of others. Her baby, her choice.
“As long as you’re a loving mum, whatever decision you make, that’s what’s right for your baby,” says the actress, 28. “We’re all just trying our best.” Amen.
She recalls an incident when she was breastfeeding her daughter Delilah, now 15 weeks, in Starbucks, which would have left her feeling vulnerable and humiliated had it happened with her eldest Matilda, now three.
“A girl about my age came to sit across from me. I was feeding quite happily with my blankets and I could see her saying to her boyfriend: ‘Oh, that’s disgusting.’ She eventually got up and made a big deal of having to leave, like: ‘I’ve just got to go!’
“I mean, how ridiculous? I just thought it was really immature. I’m doing a really natural thing. So I just ignored her and carried on feeding my baby.
“Sometimes I’m discreet and other times not so much because I’d rather Delilah was comfortable – she’s my priority.
"I don’t really care if someone doesn’t approve of me breastfeeding, I just care about my baby being happy and fed.”
In fact, far from making Helen feel ashamed, reactions like the one in the coffee shop have made her even more determined to nurse in public, in the hope that it inspires other mums to do the same. It’s also why she was delighted to breastfeed Delilah for the cover of this week’s issue.
“I think everyone when they start breastfeeding feels anxious doing it in public, so I’m happy to put it out there,” she says. “I’m like other mums – it is nerve-wracking at first. I just hope to spread awareness and show that it’s normal.”
Helen’s experience of feeding her daughters in public has largely been positive, but there has been some backlash online from people who claim her occasional posts using the hashtags #FeedWithConfidence and #NormalizeBreastfeeding are offensive to mums who bottle-feed.
Some of the commenters say she’s making them feel like “failures” and that sharing pictures on social media is “rubbing other women’s faces in it”.
On the contrary, Helen’s posts are always carefully worded and mindful of the fact that how women feed their babies is often wrapped up in a lot of emotion. She’s keen to stress today that her passion for breastfeeding doesn’t reflect on anyone who isn’t able to do it or chooses not to.
“I’m always wary because I really would hate to offend women who are bottle-feeding. I would hate to make another mother feel rubbish. Being a mum is hard enough, so I don’t want people ever to think that I think I’m a better mum because I breastfeed. I just think it’s an amazing thing to do and it’s something that I love doing and I’m passionate about.
“I never get involved [with the comments] or say anything negative on social media, because I think you’re adding fuel to the fire. It’s just not worth it at all.”
Another accusation sometimes levelled at Helen – and it’s one that baffles her – is that breastfeeding should be a private experience between mother and baby, not one to be shared on social media.
“It’s a normal thing,” she says. “I’m just feeding her, it’s something we do. I post stuff all the time about my day and feeding is just part of that. And if you don’t like what someone posts on Instagram then don’t follow them!”
The extreme sensitivity surrounding all things childbirth and parenting was never more apparent than when England and Tottenham star Harry Kane recently praised his fiancée Katie Goodland on Twitter for giving birth to their second child naturally, “with no pain relief at all”.
He was immediately jumped on, accused of shaming women who’d had epidurals or C-sections, forcing him to post a follow-up tweet the next day clarifying that women “can give birth however they would like” and he was merely expressing pride in the fact Katie had done just that.
Helen, who followed the fallout, says: “What happened [to Harry] was so mean, but it just shows that you’ve got to be so careful whatever you write on social media.
“I think because everyone loves their children so much, they want to feel that whatever choice they’ve made is OK. I always want to be sensitive about that.”
As long as you're a loving mum, whatever decision you make is right for your baby
Helen Flanagan
Helen remembers the extraordinary response she triggered herself when she revealed that she co-slept with Matilda as a baby. Debate raged about the potential dangers of bed-sharing, although research shows that it is safe if you follow certain guidelines and the mother is exclusively breastfeeding.
Two years on, Helen laughs and shrugs.
“Yeah, and she’s still in our bed. I know she’s three but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it as long as you and your partner have some time on your own.
"I don’t like the idea of my children being scared during the night. Some of them just want to be with their mum and dad, so it’s whatever works for you, really. Delilah is with us, too, in a side crib attached to the bed, and she comes in as well when she needs feeding.
“I just do whatever feels natural. Like, my sister is a brilliant mum but we’re completely different.
"She’s very into routine and has got her baby in bed by 7pm. I’ve never been good with Matilda crying, so I was always quite soft with her. We’ve got into more of a routine now because she’s started nursery and so needs to go to bed at a good time.”
Motherhood has been the making of Helen, who seems completely calm despite having travelled with Delilah single-handedly from Glasgow to Manchester by train for today’s shoot. She has been based in Scotland for the last two years since footballer fiancé Scott Sinclair signed for Celtic.
“I’ve always wanted to be a mum and I’ve wanted a baby ever since I was 18. But I waited for Scott, until he was ready. I remember when I turned 24, on my birthday he said: ‘Right, OK, we’ll try for a baby.’
“Being a mum, I feel like it’s given me... I can’t think of the words.”
Being a mum has given me purpose - it puts everything into perspective
Helen Flanagan
Completeness? “Yes! Definitely. It’s given me my purpose and it’s made me feel so much happier. I think that’s like a lot of women when they become a mum – it puts everything into perspective.”
It’s also helped improve her body image and sense of self-worth.
“What I like about having girls is I feel like it’s given me a positive outlook on my body. I want to be a role model for them and I want to embrace my body even if it’s not ‘perfect’.
“So I never want to be moaning about how I look. When I put things on my Instagram now, I don’t edit my pictures – it’s really important to me that I post natural pictures because I don’t want girls looking at them and thinking: ‘Why don’t I look like her?’ when it’s actually not real.”
She says Delilah was a surprise (“but the best surprise ever”) and she hopes to carry on adding to their family.
“I hate the thought of never having another baby. I don’t think I could ever say: ‘Oh, this is my last baby,’ because it would make me feel too sad. So I’d love to keep going on and on and on. I don’t know if Scott would like that, but I just love babies.
“I think four is a nice number. I had a water birth with Delilah and I remember afterwards saying: ‘Never again, never again,’ and now I’m like: ‘Oh my god I can’t wait to have another one!’
“Before Delilah I wondered how I could ever love another baby as much as I love my first. You think that just can’t be possible. But you do, you love them both so much and just the same.”
She’s been with Scott, 29, since she was 19, and next year they’ll celebrate a decade together.
Naturally babies have changed their relationship, but Helen says they make sure they have time for each other.
“I think it’s really important. Like the other day, for the first time in a while, we actually just had a day off from football and Matilda was at nursery, and it was just really nice to have some time together as a couple.
“Even if it’s just when you get into bed watching a box set together, you’ve got to make that time.
“It’s only natural for sleep deprivation to sometimes make you snap at each other, but you just get on with it. He’s a great dad, he’s very supportive and he goes with whatever I want to do.
“I think I’d like to get married in 2020. I went wedding dress shopping the other day with Matilda, which was hilarious! When I tried my first dress on she was like: ‘Oh, Mummy, beautiful princess!’ and then she wanted to try one of the gowns on. I don’t know how they managed to do it, but the ladies were so nice and managed to get an actual wedding dress on her by pinning her into it!”
Favourite platform?
Instagram. Who doesn’t love Insta?
Funniest person on Twitter?
I don’t really look at Twitter, but I follow Jack Whitehall on Instagram () and he’s funny.
Best on Instagram?
I love all the mummy bloggers like and Giovanna Fletcher () because she’s always so real.
Jacqueline Jossa () has a fab account, and gives great tips on breastfeeding and support for mums.
Who influences you?
I get children’s clothes and activity ideas from mummy bloggers. and her sister are fab, too.
How do you take the perfect selfie?
Lighting is key and so is knowing your angles, ha ha!
It’s currently up in the air whether or not Helen will return to Coronation Street as ditzy Rosie Webster, the role she played from 2000 to 2012 and reprised in 2017 before going on maternity leave this year. Much depends on Scott and where he’s based for football.
Now that Matilda is settled into nursery in Glasgow, spending most of the week filming in Manchester is no longer an option for Helen. She recently launched her own range of which is giving her a personal project to concentrate on while she’s on mat leave and her acting career is on hold.
“It felt important to me after coming out of Coronation Street to do something,” she says. “I had been planning on staying at Corrie for quite a while because that’s what I was enjoying doing and I was really happy there.”
Besides, at the minute, she says, it’s hard to imagine ever being apart from her baby.
“I’m so besotted with her. I know breastfeeding can be quite tying, but I think that’s really nice, having that time with the baby. I’ve never been away from Delilah once since giving birth to her and I really like that.
“I have such a strong bond with Matilda and wanted the same with Delilah. I feel like breastfeeding has really helped me achieve that.”
