Violence, sex bans…and dead rabbits: lawyer to the stars lifts the lid on A-list divorces and what’s in store for Boris and Marina
As Marina Wheeler files for divorce from Boris Johnson, Ayesha Vardag - known as 'The Diva of Divorce' - lifts the lid on what really goes on during celebrity splits
LONG-SUFFERING wife Marina Wheeler has "had enough" of Boris Johnson and is preparing to file for divorce from her husband of 25 years.
According to friends that could just be the opening salvo in a bitter battle in which she will fight for everything she is owed, after claims of his serial infidelity.
It is another high profile separation in which the gloves are well and truly off.
Earlier this summer Lisa Armstrong prepared to negotiate her parting of ways with Ant McPartlin, reportedly seeking a £50 million lump sum from the TV star’s rumoured £70 million fortune.
The news comes as little surprise to Ayesha Vardag.
Known as the “Diva of Divorce”, in her years as one of Britain’s top female divorce lawyers she has seen at close quarters what goes on behind the scenes of some of the most high profile – and rancorous – marital battles.
Among her clients have been the wife of a Qatari prince, the Marchioness of Northampton (for whom she won a cool £17m) and the former Miss Malaysia, Pauline Chai, who successfully campaigned to bring her £440m divorce case from the Laura Ashley chairman, Khoo Kay Peng, to London.
She also represented Michelle Young in her bitter legal battle with the late property tycoon Scot Young, who was jailed for six months.
Here she gives Sun Online her insight into what really goes on in the world of high-net-worth splits.
Violence and sex bans
“Celebrity marriages are no different from any other: there is violence, there is withholding of sex, there’s unkindness – these can be a factor behind the scenes of even the most outwardly gilded and well-known couples.
Sometimes even more so as so often their lives are lived in a goldfish bowl which to them can end up feeling like a pressure cooker.”
Kids used as pawns
“Custody issues are always entirely separate from the finances. They are not allowed to be linked, although that doesn’t stop people trying.
I have had male clients telling me that they don’t want full custody of their children but they want to pretend that they do to use it as a bargaining chip.
Female clients, meanwhile, have told me they don’t want their ex to see the children at all, particularly if he now has a new partner.
When I try to press them on why it usually comes down to the fact that she can’t bear that her ex has moved on and she wants to destroy the new relationship.
In these situations you have to be very responsible and make it clear that you cannot be a party to that.
I will not act under those instructions - although sadly others will.”
Posh rabbits caught in the middle
“Sometimes people fight over the most unlikely things.
I know of one case where a couple fought for so long over their very fancy rabbit that before they had concluded their fight in the court the rabbit had died.
Dogs can be quite an emotional flash-point too.”
Many clients are frightened
“Emotions always run high. Divorce is a highly-charged arena - many of my clients are genuinely heartbroken that their marriage is ending, particularly when they feel they have been betrayed - and by and large, in the most high-profile divorces, the betrayed partner tends to be the woman.
I have heard all the TV drama clichés in my office – ‘I’m going to make him pay’, ‘I’m going to take him to the cleaners.’
But it cuts both ways, particularly in celebrity marriages – I have dealt with situations where a female celebrity has gone off with a younger model and the husband is very cross and hurt about it.
There’s not just anger either: many of my clients are frightened too.
If their spouse is very influential they worry it won’t be a fair fight and they will come away with nothing.
My job is gently to try and take the emotion out of it.
When it comes to the money side of things you are trying to negotiate what is fundamentally a commercial deal that’s to do with assets and income.”
A female divorce lawyer helps men understand their wives better
“Female divorce lawyers are often favoured over their male counterparts.
Generally both sides like a female divorce lawyer: my clients are a 50-50 split between men and women.
The men think it will help them to understand their wives better - and also that it looks better for them being represented by a woman if they’re taking a tough position in court and making robust assertions about their wife’s spending or their work ethic.
Women, meanwhile, can feel mistrustful of men when they are going through a divorce. Sometimes though it’s as simple as wanting emotion and empathy – and they think they are more likely to get that from a woman.”
It's harder to predict where the money will go
“Financial settlements are now less easy to predict than they were.
For a very long time a broad principle has held true: most divorces ended in a 50-50 split of the marital assets: you cut off what has been pre-acquired or given by family, you look at what is in the pot and divide it in half.
And, contrary to popular misconception, there was no discrimination between breadwinner and homemaker.
Occasionally, if someone has made a very special contribution to the marital finances there might be an adjustment, but it is so unusual that one judge referred to this as being ‘as rare as a ‘white leopard’.
But just recently there have been a few cases that have tinkered with this.
So, for example, if the parties are running their finances very separately - say they both have careers and they are organising their finances in a way that doesn’t look like they are financial partners then the courts are not necessarily taking the same 50-50 approach.
And of course there are fiddly nuances. With high-earning professionals like television personalities who have capital but also a very high income it could be argued that that incredible income stream is an asset of the marriage as it was built up during the couple’s years together.
That argument though, was knocked on the head in one recent divorce case - although a good lawyer might be able to find ways around it.
Overall, while it’s not spelled out, the drift is towards the settlement being slightly less generous to the non-earning spouse - it’s pulling back a little from the equal split and weighting it slightly more to the person who has earned the money.”
No more ‘meal tickets for life’
“When it comes to maintenance there is definitely a move away from this.
Ten years ago when maintenance was awarded it tended to be for their joint lives.
You might apply to vary it if your circumstances changed - or those of your ex-spouse - but the starting point was that if you paid maintenance you were responsible for life.
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In recent years that has really changed. It’s now quite rare to see a ‘joint lives order’ as it is known. Instead they tend to be time-limited.
The sense now is that maintenance is there to help provide a partner with time to adjust to their new circumstances.
England is best place for a divorce
“While the settlements are no longer quite as predictable as they were, if you are the complainant – and particularly if you are the homemaker – then you are still likely to get a better settlement here than in many other countries.”