Our unlucky in love girl shames the ‘singletons’ she met online that were anything but…
Follow the adventures of our anonymous columnist as she searches for love via her smartphone
I WAS rummaging for condoms when I found his wife’s diaphragm. Mark had finally invited me back to his flat – and that’s when I found out he was married.
We’d been dating for several weeks after meeting on Happn but had always gone back to mine for sex.
He was pretty specific about the nights we could meet – but I just figured he was busy at work.
He was so good at covering his tracks I might never have known were it not for the telltale dome in the bathroom cabinet.
Cornered, he admitted he “had been married” but swore they’d split and she’d just left it there “to spite him”.
I just knew he was lying. He finally fessed up that his wife lived in Ireland and visited once a fortnight. Sayonara, Mark.
It turns out I’m not the only woman to find their online bloke double-parked, though. A new study shows nearly a third of us girls use a dating app while in a relationship – and nearly HALF of men.
Most blokes blamed boredom, rows and a poor sex life but I blame a massive attitude problem that stops them from seeing how sh**** their behaviour is.
I know a million horror stories of mates who’ve caught men with their marital pants down. Dating pro Rach (now so loved-up with a Bumbler I haven’t seen her for four months) found out her ex was a married dad via Facebook.
He kept being tagged in photos with two kids he swore were his niece and nephew. A message to the “sister” who’d tagged him revealed he’d been married for ten years and, yes, had two kids.
Even better, my uni mate Holly matched on Tinder with a chemist called Reese on the Monday after she was horribly dumped. She couldn’t believe her luck – until she decided to stalk him on Instagram before their first date.
MOST READ IN FABULOUS
His most recent photos showed him getting MARRIED just five days earlier.
Men, as much as I love them, seem to be increasingly shameless about using dating apps as a shaggers’ paradise to escape married life.
The only problem is most aren’t honest about it so women like me think they’ve met their future babydaddy and hop on sharpish.
Weeks, even months, later comes a “oh, THAT wife” busted moment and it’s tears both before, during and after bedtime.
Men of Tinder, Happn and, yes (hang your head in shame), Elite Singles, stop stashing your wives in a metaphorical basement to sleep with single women.
Be a bit more like Graham on OKCupid who messaged me to say prettily: “My wife’s an absolut cow but u look like you’d be sexy even wen u was naggin ;-)”