Being a full-time mum is really hard work – here’s how to deal with anyone who thinks it’s not
Welcome to Peta Todd's new weekly parenting column
I’M Peta Todd – welcome to my new weekly parenting column. While I don’t profess to be an expert, I do have three wonderful children aged 11, five and two, so there is never a dull moment.
Each week I will talk about some of the things that help me get through the day, from trialling the best new products to revealing “mum tricks” I have learnt.
BEING a mother is the best job in the world but it can also be the most gruelling. It makes my blood boil when people say: “So you’re just a mum?”
It’s not even the words that infuriate me. It’s the patronising tone of voice, the tilted head and the downturned mouth that accompany it – pity and judgment rolled into one dagger-like statement.
It’s the assumption my “little” life is now dull and full of PTA meetings, when it is actually the opposite.
My decision to have children keeps me pretty damn busy. On a daily basis I am a chef, nurse, cleaner, chauffeur and ad-hoc book day costume designer, to name a few of the many skills every mum needs.
They don’t write about THAT in the manual.
I didn’t hand over my birth certificate and my personality in the delivery suite in exchange for my offspring.
“Just a mum?”
Please! I have always worked and still do. Sure, being a mother is not a nine-to-five job. Instead, it’s me sitting on my laptop typing into the early hours when the small humans are in bed.
My main problem is that being seen as “just a mum” is a negative thing, rather than the kick-ass powerful thing it really can be.
Motherhood doesn’t define everything I am as a woman.
But it is something I am proud of – and all parents should be. On a daily basis, it tests me more than any other job has ever done.
MOST READ IN LIVING
Raising decent humans is a pretty important task, as far as I’m concerned. And I would never dream of judging somebody else on their life decisions.
Would you ask your own mother how she feels being “just a mum”? I doubt it.
So the next time someone tilts their head as they utter that phrase, make sure you are prepared with a knockout response proving just how great all mums really are.
KICK-ASS TIPS
HERE are some top comebacks.
- “You’re right, growing a human from scratch and fulfilling its every need to keep it alive – and happy – is kind of a menial job.”
- “To be honest, I’m thinking of getting a job doing night shifts. I have so much extra energy, as all I do is drink coffee all day.”
- “Yes, I did hand my hopes, dreams and personality over with my pelvic floor.”