I’ve had 1,000 first dates but haven’t had a man for 8 years – I expect a LOT & dump men by email if they disappoint
FINDING the right person to settle down with seems to be getting harder and harder in the digital age.
And one woman who claims to have been on more than 1,000 dates in eight years is proof of the problem.
Obsessed with her 'fairytale ending,' Suzan Mutesi, a 38-year-old actor and writer who lives between Sydney and London, was in two serious long-term relationships in her twenties – but has been unlucky in love ever since.
Suzan says she has been on 1,000 dates in the last eight years, using them as an opportunity not to cook at home.
Her evening outings became so common, and so often bad, that she has produced an automatic rejection email thanking her suitor and letting them know 'it didn't work out, but it was nice getting to know you'.
She admitted she 'expects the best' from a partner, claiming one ex even gave her an allowance and ensured she had a private car available so she never had to take public transport.
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However, Suzan has had her fair share of disastrous dates, including a Romeo who jumped into a lake during a picnic, another who set his kitchen on fire and one man who invited another woman along expecting a threesome.
Despite the setbacks and some family members encouraging her to 'give up', Suzan said she remains optimistic, putting as much effort into dating as her career, and hoping 2025 is the year she meets 'the one'.
Suzan said "I love romantic movies because I want the whole fairy tale – I believe in that kind of love."
I haven't given up on finding true love and I hope it doesn't give up on me too.
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"If I'm not on a date, on the apps, taking some new photos to update my profile, or watching a rom-com, chances are I will be out with my friends – and conversation will be about our latest dates.
"And if I'm at the gym, I will be working out to a playlist of my favourite love songs.
"I basically spend most of my spare time on the apps though."
Suzan had two long-term relationships in her twenties – she said the first was during her time at university with a man in his thirties.
Suzan described him as 'very chivalrous', explaining how he gave her an allowance and sent a private car for her so she never had to take public transport.
They were together for around four years, but eventually parted ways to focus on their careers.
Bizarre dating rituals from around the world
China - Parents of single youngsters gather at weekend “marriage markets” where they swap details of their children. They put up posters with information on each singleton’s age, height, education, job, income, values and zodiac sign.
Japan - The modern way to date is in group blind dates called "gokon". Typically, a single man and woman organise the gokon meeting, usually over dinner, and each invites three or four eligible friends.
South Korea - Singles meet in a practice called “sogaeting”, or blind dating. Family members or friends make the introductions, or sometimes matchmaking agencies are used. If a singleton likes someone, they must contact them immediately afterwards.
Iceland - The big dating worry for Icelanders — in a country of just 330,000 people — is accidentally romancing someone you’re related to. So there is a special app to see if you're related. If you are on a date and both have the app, you can bump your phones together to discover any unwanted familial connections.
Latin America - As soon as you start dating someone, you are dating their family, too. From having to learn their language, to taking part in family events and traditions.
Myanmar - Young people often still live with their parents, whether they are single, in a relationship or even after they are married. For this reason, privacy is hard to come by.
Many new couples go to a nearby park with an umbrella that they use to kiss behind. As a result, umbrellas are seen as a very important accessory to own and are often expensive to buy.
A few years later, at 27, Suzan entered another relationship, which lasted three years – but she knew 'they were not meant to be'.
Suzan has been on a quest to find 'the one' since then, claiming she has gone on more than 1,000 dates in the past eight years.
"I knew love was out there, and I wasn't going to get it sitting at home in my pyjamas – I had to go out there and get it," she said.
In her early thirties, she said she was averaging at least three dates a week, and that would go on a dinner date just because she 'didn't feel like cooking'.
Nowadays, she claims she typically goes on at least one date per week.
I had to get out of there very quickly – I don't know why he thought I'd be up for that.
Suzan
Suzan uses dating apps like Bumble and Hinge, but is also open to meeting someone in person.
She insists on always looking her best whenever she leaves the house, always wearing make-up and never wearing 'comfy pants', in her quest to attract Mr Right.
Over the years, Suzan has had her fair share of memorable dates, for both good and bad reasons.
In 2021, she said she went on a promising date that quickly soured when the man invited another woman along, expecting a threesome.
She added: "I had to get out of there very quickly – I don't know why he thought I'd be up for that."
It's not the only time her dates have ended badly.
She was taken to a picnic in the park the same year which took an unexpected turn.
The ducks saw the food and came close…he started chasing them and ended up in the water,' she recalled.
'It was hilarious; I just couldn't stop laughing…but then he couldn't get out, so I literally had to get in and help him.
'I was so annoyed – it ruined my designer dress. I did not see him again.'
In 2023, she said a man tried to impress her by cooking dinner, but ended up setting the pan on fire.
His ash-covered face and offer to buy pizza instead did little to win her over.
"I was not impressed," Suzan said. "The fact he offered me carbs when I was meant to be staying over too."
She even claims to have an automatic message system set up for when dates do not go to plan.
"I never like to waste time," she explained.
"If I don't feel like the date was right for me, I have an automatic email I send basically saying ''hey, thank you so much for a great time, I just want to let you know it didn't work out, but it was nice getting to know you.""
Her longest relationship since turning 30 lasted just three months she adds.
Suzan added: "I put as much effort into my dating life as my career, and I think once you put in effort, you will get results."
Suzan said she hopes to inspire other women in their thirties to embrace dating, encouraging them to accept that everyone's journey to love is unique – she has even written a about her experiences, Love Beyond 30s.
Finding true love remains her New Year's resolution for 2025, and she plans to continue dating through apps and putting herself out there in person.
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"I want my fairytale ending, I want to meet the one and get married," Suzan said.
"I'm going to keep going and hope he comes along soon, I'm obsessed with the idea of it!"