The 10 gifts you’re buying your kids for Xmas that make you a selfish, irresponsible or lazy parent – according to a pro

IT'S Christmas day and you're watching your little ones opening the gifts placed underneath the decorated tree.

One by one, their tiny hands remove the wrapping paper and you watch their faces light up, as they discover a brand new iPhone hiding inside - or perhaps it's the skincare set the tween has been going on about for months.

After all, this is exactly what they wanted and wouldn't stop pestering you about in the run-up to the manic Christmas shopping.

But while the kids are sure to be thrilled with their pressies, have you ever wondered what these gifts tell about YOU, the parent behind them?

Well, one expert in the field - and mum-of-two - has spilled the beans on it all - so if you're yet to head to the stores, you may want to listen up.

From high-end tech to the viral sell-out Aldi wooden toys, here's what the parenting guru has to say about your gifts this year - and why it's bad news if you're considering buying iPads...

Skincare for tweens and teens

Buying into the marketing around these brands and trends, is very dangerous.

It’s so important that parents understand the damage they can be doing to their kids by buying expensive creams and lotions, not just their skin, but to their self-esteem and self-perception.

Also, the notion that the parents feel they need this stuff, can lead kids to feel unworthy or not good enough in the skin they are in, because if their parents don’t see them good enough, how can they feel good enough in themselves?

I think it’s important to teach kids how to look after their skin, for sure, but the GRWM [Get Ready With Me] trends and buying into the marketing of these brands, needs very careful consideration as to how these will impact their child further down the line. 

iPads or other expensive tech

Parents might be grappling with finding offline entertainment options for their kids or is inclined toward high-tech engagement, seeing technology as both a practical solution and a status symbol.

They may also like being up-to-date with tech, themselves and be very tech savvy, perhaps implying that they see digital literacy as essential.

While we are living in a highly digitalised world, I think tech should be heavily monitored and boundaries put in place on its usage.

Allowing kids to spend the festive period glued to screens is irresponsible and takes kids away from spending proper, quality, time with the family.

It’s prevents forming and keeping close bonds with family members and means they are missing out on doing or experiencing other important aspects of childhood. 

It also helps encourage screen addiction and a reliance on screens to pacify themselves. Moderation is key. 

Aldi/Lidl toys

A trend-savvy parent might love these toys and see them as quality, aesthetically pleasing, and affordable and shows they want the "best" without breaking the bank.

They are usually good value compared to the bigger brands, but these could be a regretful buy if the mums are buying them just because they are '‘trendy'’ and to make their Instagram feed look cool because if their kids aren’t interested in them - which is possible, they will be a waste of money, plus they will have stopped someone else buying, who has a child who genuinely wants one.

You could say the mums are selfish - for putting their own needs (social media validation) before those of others.

Latest clothing brands/trends

Parents who are highly fashion-conscious and eager to pass that onto their child, possibly projecting the idea of a mini-fashionista.

This can also suggest a want for their child to fit in, stay on-trend, or even stand out in a stylish way.

Perhaps they never felt they had anything “trendy” as a child, and so are reliving their own childhoods, or perhaps they did and feel they should do the same as their parents did for them. 

This could also reflect a parent’s desire to project status, or provide their children with a sense of belonging in certain social circles.

A term to describe this phenomenon could be “brand-centric parenting”.

Books

Book-giving parents often see reading as a fundamental part of children’s development.

They see the merit in kids enjoying books and could also be a book-lover themselves.

It may also suggest a preference for "wholesome" or screen-free activities.

STEM kits

Parents choosing these gifts might be STEM enthusiasts themselves and might prioritise educational play, also hoping their child will grow up with a strong foundation in science and technology, perhaps even hinting at aspirations of raising a "future innovator."

Sports equipment

Parents who pick sports equipment might prioritise physical activity in their kids.

They may also be sporty and want to give their child opportunities to try sports themselves.

Arts and crafts

Choosing art-related gifts suggests parents who values creativity, self-expression, and perhaps even the mental health benefits of artistic hobbies.

This is likely a parent who doesn’t mind kids getting messy and also enjoys crafting.

Collectibles - Squishmallows, Pokémon cards

These parents might like keeping up with the latest toy trends and want their child to feel a sense of belonging by having what's "in." 

Instilling in kids that they have to have the latest fad, isn’t a great thing.

While it can be harmless and a bit of fun collecting things, like Squismallows, it can teach kids that it’s more important to have material things over anything else. 

Experience gifts

Parents might want to prioritise memories and bonding over material items.

It suggests a love for quality time and trying new experiences and giving a child the opportunity to to have a go at new things.