I’ve been married for 28 years but we can sleep with other people – it makes us stronger, says Michelle Visage
MICHELLE Visage has been married for 28 years, but she’s recently revealed all on her open relationship.
The RuPaul’s Drag Race judge confessed that she and her husband David Case have full transparency in their relationship and claimed that their openness makes them stronger.
Speaking on the Origins With Cush Jumbo podcast, Michelle Visage, 56, explained how she met her now-husband.
She shared: “So when I met David, I was 26. I got married at 27. Still young.
“We've been together for 28 years now and I met him in New York City in Central Park and I had just gotten out of a relationship that was like the love of my life and he destroyed me.
“After that, I had a summer of debauchery and then I met David in Central Park and he was so opposite. He was very much like Michael, my ex fiance.”
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The three-time winner then shared all on her unique and open relationship.
In Hollywood, a long marriage is the stuff of fairy tales, but Michelle is frank about the dynamics of their relationship and how it thrives.
She revealed: “[David] works drag cons with me, and he comes to all these things with me, and listen, my husband's quite good looking, so the gay men have let it be known that he's quite good looking.
“He beams with pride. He's got that thing down. I think you call it compersion.
“We live openly, so he would get off knowing that I was so happy and no matter what it is that I do, and I'm not just talking sexually.
“Whatever it is, I don't know if I have compersion in me to be really excited if he's doing something with another woman but I know that it exists and he is 100% that.”
Sometimes described as the opposite of jealousy, comperison is the idea of feeling happiness and joy at others' experiences.
Cush Jumbo, the actress best known for her leading role as attorney Lucca Quinn in the CBS drama series The Good Wife, chimed in and said: “It’s like giving you the opportunity to have the space to feel like you never have to hide any piece of yourself.”
To this, the former Strictly star replied and confirmed: “And I don't and neither does he. Sometimes that hurts, but that's what makes us stronger.
We live openly, so he would get off knowing that I was so happy
Michelle Visage
“The full transparency of the way we live our lives. Completely and, by the way, sometimes it's not even necessary.
“It's just, meaning, we don't do anything. It's just the ability to be able to. […] And that's what works for us.”
The star, who grew up in New Jersey as Michelle Shupack, met her husband when she was singing in the girl band Seduction.
David, a successful screenwriter from Los Angeles, was starting out as an actor when he was introduced to Michelle at an industry party.
What is an open relationship?
An open relationship means having more than one sexual partner at the same time.
Both parties in the relationship agree to be non-exclusive and one or both parties engages in sexual activities outside the relationship.
If one or both parties engage in sexual relationships without an agreement, this would be classed as cheating.
Other names for an open relationship are polyamory and consensual non-monogamy.
They married in 1997 and have two daughters Lillie, and Lola, with David putting his career on hold to raise the girls while Michelle worked.
Michelle, who appeared on Celebrity Big Brother in 2015 and has been a staunch LGBTQ+ supporter for decades added: “David and I just started talking, and it was like magic. We got engaged six weeks later and we got married nine months later. Right away. Straight away. That night. Done.
“And he wouldn't sleep with me that night. I tried. And he's like, I just want to make sure this isn't a rebound. Came back the next night. But the first night, he said no. He said no.
As we grow together, we also grow separately, and our needs and our wants will change
Michelle Visage
“He's so opposite of anybody I've ever dated. The kindest soul. He's lovely.”
When it comes to an almost 30-year marriage, Michelle revealed the secrets to the success of their relationship.
She confessed: "Kindness, understanding, independence, knowing who you are, knowing what you need from your partner, knowing what you're willing to negotiate, I think is important because as we grow together, we also grow separately, and our needs and our wants will change.