TERRIBLE TOTS
I’m a mum-of-three & I’m sick of other parents not disciplining their kids – they’re raising ‘monsters’
And a mum who received backlash after gifting her toddler a smartphone
A WOMAN sparked outrage online after sharing her recent experiences with misbehaving toddlers.
People criticised the hands-off approach parents nowadays seem to be taking.
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In a on Mumsnet, the unnamed user explained that she has noticed how "people just let their toddlers run wild."
The woman revealed that she has three children who are currently of primary and secondary school age.
While the mum said she still remembers the difficulty of the toddler stage, she said she couldn't wrap her head around the approach some parents have taken.
She explained that she took her eight-year-old daughter to a farm park and noticed the poor parenting.
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"My daughter was in a big sandpit, quite focused on building something, and toddlers were allowed on several occasions to come over and knock it down," she said.
The woman added that there was "no intervention from any parents."
She cited other examples from the same day, including toddlers holding up a busy slide with a "big queue of kids."
Her daughter was also prevented from enjoying the trampoline and hoop games she had waited patiently for after more toddlers intervened.
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The mum explained that the parents on each occasion appeared to be oblivious to the frustration their children were causing.
She also recalled an "older baby crawling around the middle of the floor in a cafe" at the farm park.
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The woman pointed out that this caused difficulty for the "waiter carrying two huge plates of food [who] nearly tripped over them."
"Obviously it's not the fault of the toddlers but when my kids were that age I constantly had to talk to them about turn taking," the poster wrote.
"Of course it's hard work but that's how they they learn."
The mum-of-three said she was "just getting fed up of older children being expected to tolerate this behaviour and parents finding it funny and cute."
She shared her frustration that "parents [are] doing nothing to stop it and looking on at their toddlers all gooey-eyed."
Different parenting techniques
Here are some widely recognised methods:
Authoritative Parenting
This technique will often foster independence, self-discipline, and high self-esteem in children.
It is often considered the most effective, this technique is where parents set clear expectations - enforcing rules - whilst also showing warmth and support.
Authoritarian Parenting
This is opposite to authoritative parenting, as it is where the parent sets high demands but is low on responsiveness.
It involves ensuring the child is obedient and often employ punitive measures. While this can lead to disciplined behaviour, it may also result in lower self-esteem and social skills in children.
Permissive Parenting
Permissive parents tend to be indulgent and lenient, often taking on a role more akin to a friend than an authority figure. They are highly responsive but lack demandingness, granting children a lot of freedom. This method can nurture creativity and a free-spirited nature but may also result in poor self-regulation and difficulties with authority.
Uninvolved Parenting
Uninvolved or neglectful parenting is marked by low responsiveness and low demands. Parents in this category offer minimal guidance, nurturing, or attention. This often leaves children feeling neglected, which can have significant negative effects on their emotional and social development.
Helicopter Parenting
Helicopter parents are extremely involved and overprotective, frequently micromanaging their children’s lives. Although their goal is to protect and support, this approach can hinder a child's ability to develop independence and problem-solving skills.
Free-Range Parenting
Free-range parenting encourages children to explore and learn from their surroundings with minimal parental interference. This method promotes independence and resilience but requires a safe and supportive environment to be successful.
Attachment Parenting
According to , Attachment parenting focuses on physical closeness and emotional bonding, often through practices such as co-sleeping and baby-wearing. This approach aims to create secure attachments and emotional well-being, but demands significant time and emotional commitment from parents.
Each of these parenting techniques has its own set of strengths and weaknesses. The key is to find a balanced approach that aligns with the family's values and meets the child's needs for a healthy, happy upbringing.
Mumsnet users shared their thoughts on the modern approach to parenting.
"Yep. Then the half-shrug with a ‘What can I do, she’s sassy LOL’. Raising monsters," wrote one parent.
"Too many kids doing exactly what they want and when they want," agreed another person.
"'Back in the day' kids would have been unsupervised in playgrounds and if a three-year-old got booted at the bottom of a slide they soon learnt not to be at the bottom of the slide," said a third reader.
However, not everyone agreed with the criticism of toddler parents nowadays.
"You are a classic example of forgetting and I mean 'really' forgetting what the toddler stage is truly like," pointed out one Mumsnet user.
"I agree that at every stage there is some shocking parenting, always has been and always will be," wrote another person.
"But you sound a bit smug, so be careful."
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"It amazes me that people are still so ignorant of child development, after all the research and information that is readily available out there," commented one reader.
"People that are offended by a small child's 'behaviour' really need to take a long hard look at themselves."
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