My daughter was six weeks old when I peeked at her dad’s phone while he played golf & discovered his devastating secret
A WOMAN has revealed the devastating secret she discovered about her partner, when their daughter was just six weeks old.
Hannah Walker took a peek at her husband's phone one night, when he was out playing golf, and discovered that he had gambled away £100,000.
When she first made the discovery, she admitted that she had felt "cheated and betrayed".
However, the experience ended up being a turning point in the couple's relationship, and she has now written an Edinburgh Fringe show, titled Gamble, about her experience.
Hannah met her partner through a mutual friend, and the pair had been together for around eight years, when she made the devastating discovery.
She said that looking back, their must have been tell-tale signs of his addiction, but alarm bells only started to ring when the couple opened a joint account.
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On the night when Hannah made the discovery, her partner had left his phone at home, which she now believes was a cry for help.
Her daughter was just six weeks old at the time, but instead of packing up and leaving her partner, she said that she felt relieved.
After confronting him, Hannah's partner finally began to open up to her, and a healing process began.
Hannah told The Mirror: "So until it came up, it felt like a big spot that was getting really full of s***.
"And then all of a sudden it popped. And it was awful and really sad, but then also it felt like a relief."
Hannah had no idea what to do at first, so took to Google to find answers.
She emailed Gamblers Anonymous, and they swiftly replied to her, providing her with a "massive lifeline."
She said: "I don't know what I would have done at that point because I was so scared.
"I couldn't call my family, couldn't call my friends, because I didn't want anyone to judge him or think, 'Why if he's just had a baby would he spend all that money and gamble?'
"Obviously, I know he's a wonderful person. I knew it wasn't him."
How to get help for a gambling addiction
Gambling addiction is a serious issue that can have devastating effects on individuals and their families. Recognizing the signs and symptoms is crucial for seeking timely help. Common indicators of a gambling problem include spending more money and time on gambling than intended, lying about gambling activities, and experiencing financial difficulties as a result. Emotional symptoms may include anxiety, stress, and depression, often exacerbated by the losses and the cycle of chasing them.
There are several avenues for support and treatment for those struggling with gambling addiction. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is a common approach that helps individuals change their gambling behaviors and thoughts. Support groups, such as Gamblers Anonymous, provide a community of individuals facing similar challenges, offering mutual support and understanding. Additionally, various helplines and online resources are available to provide immediate assistance and guidance.
It is essential for friends and family members to be aware of these signs and encourage their loved ones to seek professional help. Early intervention can prevent the escalation of the problem and help individuals regain control over their lives. By addressing gambling addiction head-on and utilizing available resources, individuals can work towards recovery and a healthier, more balanced life.
After Hannah's partner started to attend GA meetings, the change was instantaneous, and his relationships with friends and family members became stronger.
However, when Hannah attended a group for loved ones of gambling addicts, she struggled to cope with her emotions.
She said: "I would come out of the meetings feeling really p***** off and angry because it would be a reminder of everything.
"Just the reality was hitting home a bit more, I think. But I didn't want him to feel [bad] because I was so proud and happy for him that he felt so good and he could talk about it.
"But I was just being reminded of everything that I'd lost."
The couple are now in a "much happier" place and and Hannah wrote her Fringe Show Gamble to help her deal with her resentment.
She said: "I find it really helpful for me to get everything out on paper. And that's what I know to do, make shows.
"That's what I enjoy doing, but I also found it really helpful for me."
The show also helped her to realise the need for tougher regulations on gambling.
She said: "It's absolutely everywhere. It's in the palm of your hand the whole time on your mobile phone. And that's what I found with my partner.
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"It's not getting any better because it's all the time, and because you can just open your phone wherever you are having a poo."
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