I’ve cheated on my wife with over 20 women…in pools, parks, cinemas and everywhere in our home

NETFLIX’s Ashley Madison: Sex, Lies & Scandal exposes the dangers of illicit affairs, after the website was hacked.

But Paul, 63, who has been unfaithful throughout his 30-year marriage, tells Yasmin Harisha, it’s the tip of the iceberg . . . 

"WHEN I got married I vowed to stay faithful — even though I’d cheated on previous girlfriends.

But within five years I’d broken my promise by having my first affair when I was 39.

After we’d had our two children my wife lost interest in sex and I felt like I was going mad.

I’ve got a high sex drive but hers had stalled. I asked a friend whether it was normal and he said yes, then admitted he’d had affairs.

Since then, over the three decades my wife and I have been married, I’ve cheated with over 20 women.

MEETING AT THE OFFICE

THE first affair, like many, started at work.

I work in marketing and a married colleague made it clear she was interested in me, by making suggestive remarks and being tactile when we were chatting.

The first time we had sex we were at a conference so did it in a hotel room.

After that we’d romp in the office, after hours.

I got a buzz from sitting at my desk the following morning knowing I’d had sex on my chair.

It soon fizzled out because we weren’t compatible, but it gave me an appetite for more.

COUPLING UP IN A CARRIAGE

SINCE then, I’ve had more than one affair with colleagues.

With one woman, we often travelled to meetings on trains.

Train toilets aren’t known for their cleanliness — though it’s not something either men or women focus on in the heat of the moment.

But the thrill of knowing passengers are nearby is a good one.

I’ve never been caught, but the risk is there which makes it more exciting.

I love then going to the meet-ing and being professional, knowing that just an hour before we’d had sex.

JOINING THE MILE-HIGH CLUB

MY company is international and I was once sent to New York for a week with a colleague.

The thought of suggesting the Mile High Club to my wife is laughable.

She’s reading her book before we even take off — I might as well be invisible.

But on this trip with my colleague, we had sex in the loo on the way out and on the way back — and we fondled each other under the blanket, right beside another passenger.

According to a poll by Jetsetter.com, 15 per cent of air passengers have had sex on a plane, so I’m not alone.

We were very subtle and I would swear the other passengers didn’t realise — the cabin was dark.

EXTRAMARITAL WEBSITES

OVER the years, I learned that the best place to find lovers was on websites specifically for extra-marital affairs — although the Ashley Madison data breach suggests otherwise.

The good thing about these sites, in general, is that the women are also married and understand the restrictions on time — and that I don’t want to end my marriage.

One relationship that began on such a site lasted two years.

One time, we were at a hotel with an outdoor pool.

In the evening, the pool was empty, so we slid in and had sex.

It was exciting, as people looking out of their bedroom windows would be able to see and wonder what we were up to.

X-RATED CINEMA

I’M sure many men, and women, have imagined getting frisky with some-one in the cinema.

But even in the early days there is no way my wife would have risked it.

What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. In all other ways, I’m a model husband.

Five years ago I had an adventurous girlfriend and we did it a few times in the cinema — full sex, with her sitting astride me.

We’d go to a morning screening, which would be empty, though on one occasion a man came in and sat so close to us we left.

We had to stop going as they installed CCTV, which you could view in the foyer.

‘LONG LUNCHES’ AT HOTEL

WHEN I first started cheating you’d have to book a room for the night, which was expensive.

But these days you can rent them for a period of time during the day, using sites like Day Use, for a fraction of the price.

It means I can nip out of the office for a long lunch and be back in a few hours without anyone being any the wiser.

The only risk with this is being seen heading towards the lift with a woman beside you, so I always made sure we went up separately.

I once bumped into a mate on my way to a hotel. He asked where I was going and I said just for a quick drink and he insisted on coming with me.

My affair partner turned up and fortunately knew not to approach me.

I then went through the farce of leaving and pretending to head back to the office, before I managed to escape my friend and double back.

FORENSIC CLEANING AT HOME

I’M sure people will judge me for this but I imagine others who have had affairs have done the same.

Every month or so my wife stays with her parents, so I will invite my lover of the time round for some nookie — it’s cheaper than a hotel room.

My children are in their twenties, so have moved out.

I’ve had sex everywhere in my house from the lounge to the marital bed and even in our garden.

Afterwards, I go through the house with a fine comb, removing stray hairs and washing up the wine glasses.

I don’t feel guilty — if anything, it gives me a thrill when I’m watching a film with my wife, thinking about how I’ve had sex on our sofa.

SEX IN THE SUNSHINE

THE feeling of sunshine on your body when you have sex is second to none.

I’ve done it several times in the countryside.

You need an adventurous partner and a secluded place.

Keep some of your clothes on so it’s easy to pull them back into place should someone come along.

I’ve had to rearrange my clothes hastily on several occasions.

DIRTY DANCING

I TOOK a girlfriend to a gig and we ended up getting down and dirty.

We didn’t have full sex, but we did enjoy a fumble.

It’s such a turn-on being intimate when surrounded by other people.

We did a similar thing in a nightclub, while sitting at a table.

The music was pounding, the lights were dim and no one would have cared even if they did see us.

I’ve seen other people doing it and I bet a lot of them are cheating — as far as I can tell from my male friends it’s not the sort of thing wives do.

Many women will be shocked to read my confessions and I’m not particularly proud of a lot of it.

But I am not alone. The dating sites for married people who want to cheat are proof of this.