KIM Kardashian is a thing of beauty but even they have feelings - and screaming at people just because they make you feel fat is never a good look.
From the moment she understood with the 2007 sex tape that images of her body would be bought and sold in the public marketplace, Kim decided that she would own her objectification and has weaponised both her sex appeal and her slut-shaming into a business empire.
Looking good is her job so why are so many people having the vapours about the fact she turned up at the Met Gala in a corset dress, which (un)naturally gave her a tiny waist?
The criticisms have included the notions that she seemed to be in pain, as if the po-faced death-stare wasn’t habitually adopted by the high fashion crowd, to whom a smile would be only less likely to be flouted on the red carpet as a crusty old cold sore.
That she could barely breathe - she’s having her photograph taken for a few hours, not running a half-marathon - and that she may have had a rib removed.
Doubtful, but so what if she did - a woman’s right to choose must surely extend to ribs as well as foetuses?
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Critics also argue the look was old hat as the weight loss had previously been revealed in the Marilyn Monroe dress at the same gala back in 2022.
Good on her for keeping the weight off.
And that she wore a ‘tatty’ shrug over the top of the silver Maison Margiela by John Galliano gown.
The last shows how desperate KK’s critics are; if she’d have sashayed out there without it, showing off her cleavage, they’d have tut-tutted about how pathetic she is for wanting to remain a sex kitten into middle age, while being a mother of four.
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People need to make their minds up; is it bad for KK to ‘flaunt’ her body, or cowardly of her to don a cardy? It can’t be both.
But of course it can be where this woman is concerned, because the very fact that she has worked so hard at looking good means she can do nothing right.
If Lizzo or another overweight female celebrity had turned up in the most revealing gown imaginable there would have been a sickening online chorus of ‘GO, KWEEN!’
Because we aren’t meant to criticise overweight women - only those who’ve put effort into defining how they want to look.
A woman’s right to choose must surely extend to ribs as well as foetuses?
Julie Burchill, 64
In recent years - in an attempt to redress the unfair prejudice against fat people as thick and lazy - the somewhat oxymoronic term Fat Activism has emerged.
This isn’t ‘activism’ as in standing on picket lines in the pouring rain helping the wretched of the earth to get a living wage, as we used to understand it; this is sitting on your big fat BTM and swearing at ‘haters’ on the Internet while a gaggle of similarly chunky girlfriends encourage you to ‘SLAY!’
It may well be a bad thing that fat people have been looked down upon - but the attempt to reframe fat women in particular as somehow more ‘real’ than thin women was bound to attract a bunch of idiots with grudges.
Suffering so I could look good wouldn't suit me - but then, I’m a 64-year-old who earns a living from my brain.
Anyone who has seen the Kardashians' reality show knows that though KK always looks good - she’s beautiful, and was so before she had any of her extensive cosmetic surgery - she spends a great deal of her down-time in expensive athleisure wear.
To think that she wasn’t peeled out of that dress as soon as she got home from the world’s most exclusive costume party is as dumb as believing that Bjork regularly wore her swan frock to Tesco.
Because we aren’t meant to criticise overweight women - only those who’ve put effort into defining how they want to look
Julie Burchill, 64
By turning themselves into commodities, the Kardashians have managed to live their lives hiding in plain sight, shape-shifting (and face-changing) for their own amusement.
The mother becomes a manager, cynical Kourtney becomes a hippie health-fiend, tough Khloe is repeatedly trounced by men, plain Kylie becomes a make-up magnate and quiet Kendall becomes a supermodel.
In the biggest twist of all, Kim - whose bum was once her raison d’être - becomes a barrister.
If she fancies having a 19-inch waist for a night, it’s all part of the same game of hide and seek which has ensured that she will continue laughing all the way to the bank while her critics waste their time online criticising her.
But if overweight women can only gain self-respect by putting self-disciplined slender women down, they are not worthy of respect.
Simultaneously self-adoring and self-pitying, Fat Activism - ‘body positivity’ if you will - is just the latest entry to the Victim Olympics, another group who claim to be at once oppressed and powerful; at the risk of stereotyping, I can’t help thinking that this is just a tiny bit greedy.
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As for those killjoys who condemn KK as a 'bad role model' because she enjoys showing off the body the Lord (OK - and cosmetic surgery) gave her, I'd point them towards her tireless publicising of the Armenian genocide by Turkey (still denied) and her funding of the 90 Days To Freedom campaign which works to release non-violent drug offenders from life sentences.
So no, I won’t be joining the scolding chorus which attacks an adult woman for dressing up how she pleases for one single, solitary night - and furthermore, I’d advise them to shut up and have another cake.
'Meh' Gala not Met Gala
FASHION Editor Clemmie Fieldsend says: Fashion's biggest night out usually sees designers delve deep into their creative minds and archives to show off how they can bag best dressed.
But this year it was, well, quite dull, The MEH Gala if you will.
Huge crowd stopping moments we’ve seen in the past didn’t happen - in fact the red carpet was so dull Zendaya walked it twice, and the second time was in a long black cloak.
You can usually count on Kim Kardashian to do something extreme, like last year in Marylin Monroe's real dress, and this year was no exception.
She took showing off her already tiny waist to the extreme in a corseted look by Marigela.
Clutching on to an old-looking cardigan wearing a silver bustier with delicate floral overlay, not only did she rub people up the wrong way by wearing something so abnormally small but also wasn’t amazing.
One X (formally known as Twitter) user said: "Ratty looking cardigan. Hair unstyled. and the same corset trick she’s done every Met gala. Kimmy I hope you know you’re boring".
Okay, it’s a bit harsh, but I agree.
Even though there is a lot of intricacy and detail to everyone's look, there's nothing like Rihanna’s wowing yellow dress in 2015, or Beyonce's sheer embellished gown from 2015, or any of Blake Lively's past looks.
The theme was JG Ballard’s 1962 short story, The Garden of Time, which meant references to decay, lots of florals, but loads of looks had nothing to do with that, like Tylas sand dress which I really do love, but it's just not quite right.
There were some winners like Elle Fanning, Sarah Jessica Parker, Gigi Hadid and Raye.
Let's hope next year stars and brands up the ante.