BOSSING IT
I’m 16 and my boss is making me uncomfortable with his affection and sexual comments
Nobody should accept unwanted sexualised comments as compliments, so trust your instincts
APPRENTICE star and West Ham United vice-chair Karren Brady answers your careers questions.
Here she gives advice to a reader whose boss has been making sexualised comments about her appearance and body.
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Q. I’m 16 and work in a coffee shop at the weekend.
The male owner of the shop is very affectionate and tactile, and he has made lots of sexualised comments to me about my appearance and body.
My colleagues have told me I should be flattered by the attention, as “he doesn’t do it to the ugly girls”, and that I should take it as a compliment, but I don’t feel like this at all – in fact, it makes me really uncomfortable.
Is this normal and am I being overdramatic?
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A. This situation is incredibly concerning, and it’s crucial that you understand it’s neither normal nor acceptable behaviour – in the workplace or anywhere else.
I would strongly encourage you to reach out to a trusted adult, such as a parent, family friend or teacher, about what you’re experiencing.
If you are ever on shifts where you are alone with this man, I would be extremely concerned – these matters can escalate very quickly, so it’s vital to seek support.
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It’s troubling to hear that your colleagues are downplaying your discomfort and attempting to normalise inappropriate behaviour.
Nobody should accept unwanted sexualised comments as compliments, so trust your instincts.
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If you feel comfortable doing so, you could prepare a reply to use when your manager makes such comments, and when other staff members are present.
For example: “Please do not comment on my appearance, it makes me feel uncomfortable.”
However, my advice is to prioritise your safety above all, even if this means leaving your job.
While earning your own money is important, enduring inappropriate behaviour is never worth it.
- Got a careers question for Karren? Email [email protected].
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