Have better sex this season by writing kinky bucket list, sending saucy texts and romping in shower
DO you want better sex? You’re not alone. Our spring sex survey revealed half of Sun readers want more adventure in the bedroom but don’t know where to start.
Sun Sexpert Georgette Culley reveals how to dust off those cobwebs and put the magic back into your love life . . .
Write a sex bucket list
SPRING is the perfect time to try something new. Whether this is different positions, incorporating novelty toys or exploring fantasies, experimenting can be a real turn-on.
Before you start your list, brainstorm things you’d like to mix up, such as locations, roleplay scenarios and any other kinks you’d like to try.
Write down your fantasies and share them with your other half. Use a traffic code system to convey what you like – or don’t.
Try the 10-5-10 intimacy rule
MORE than 75 per cent of women cannot orgasm by penetration alone, so foreplay is essential for helping to reach the finishing line.
The 10-5-10 sex rule is a foreplay technique designed to stimulate various erogenous zones throughout the body.
Begin by dedicating ten minutes to activities above the neck, such as kissing and gently nibbling earlobes.
Then take five minutes to explore everything between the neck and navel.
Nipple stimulation can be a huge turn-on for both men and women, research shows.
For the finale, spend a good ten minutes down below using your hands, mouth and even toys. Enjoy!
Try tantra to connect
WHEN couples are suffering inside the bedroom, it is often because they are suffering outside, too.
Tantra is a brilliant tool from India to help you reconnect, physically and emotionally.
Through ancient practices such as eye-gazing, synchronised breathing and mindful touching, couples can strengthen their bond and increase their sense of intimacy.
To increase the closeness, get naked and lie next to your partner while you practise these exercises.
Slowly move your hands across your partner’s body, but resist having intercourse. Practise this for around ten minutes a day before bed.
Open up for discussion
COMMUNICATION is always key to having a healthy sex life.
Pick a time when you and your partner are relaxed and have privacy.
Never discuss sex during moments of stress or tension.
Adopt a positive and non-confrontational tone to create a safe space for enjoying open discussion.
Begin by expressing how much you love and appreciate your partner.
Invite them to share their feelings by asking open-ended questions like: “How do you feel about X, Y or Z?”
Spruce up your top drawer
IF your dresser is full of uninspiring socks gifted by your gran, it’s time for a change.
Also clear out mundane cottons and transform the space into something more enticing, with toys and sexy lingerie.
Gone are the days of needing to visit an adult store to get a buzzing friend.
You can now find one at the supermarket for as little as £10. Check out the Durex Intense Delight Vibrating Bullet.
Take sexting to the next level
CONTRARY to common belief, foreplay doesn’t start in the bedroom.
Ramp up the romance by taking your partner on a sexting scavenger hunt.
Send them sexy clues and steamy rewards throughout the day to build sexual tension.
Couples who sext report greater sexual satisfaction than those who do not, research has found. If you’re going to send nudes, never include your face.
This reduces the risk of your identity being exposed if the photos were to be shared later without your consent.
Sun sex survey
- 52% of Sun readers want more adventurous sex
- 49% want to improve their sexual skill set
- 49% don't know how to speak to their partners about their fantasies
- 33% want their partner to try roleplay
- 21% want to try a threesome
Detoxify your lovers
WHETHER you’re single or in a relationship, toxic lovers can seep into all areas of your life.
If your partner is causing feelings of stress, sadness or anxiety and impact-ing your feelings of self-worth, it may signify a problem connection.
Healthy relationships should foster love and contentment, so it’s important not to accept anything less.
If you feel the need to seek some support from a relationship counsellor, you can reach out with confidence at Relate. See relate.org.uk.
Experiment with menage a trois
NEARLY a quarter of Sun readers would like to have a threesome.
But while it can be thrilling and enriching for some couples, it does come with risks.
Start off by having an honest conversation with your other half about your sexual desires, expectations and boundaries.
Ensure you’re on the same page and have rules in place before you dive in.
Always choose the third party together so no one feels left out.
There’s a plethora of kinky apps where you can find someone like-minded to fulfil your fantasy.
To avoid feelings of jealousy, it’s easier having a three-way with a stranger than someone you know.
Give roleplay a whirl
STEP into someone else’s shoes for a night to turn up the heat between the sheets.
Whether it’s a sexy nurse, a brave firefighter or mysterious spy, roleplaying can add a real element of excitement to sex.
Taking on a different persona can help couples share their inner desires.
Afterwards, discuss with your partner what you enjoyed and what you might want to try differently next time.
This can help to deepen your understanding of each other’s desires and increase the level of intimacy.
Refill your fridge
IF you want to refuel your sex drive, you’ll need to overhaul your fridge first.
Pack it full with plenty of aphrodisiac meals such as seafood, beetroot and veggie curries.
Couples who eat seafood twice a week have more sex than those who don’t, research shows.
Seafood is rich in zinc, which is vital for men’s sexual health and helping erectile dysfunction.
Beetroot can boost the level of nitric oxide in the blood, which ups your libido.
Get new bed linen
THE bedroom is still the most popular spot for nookie, with half of Brits favouring the trusty bed over other furniture.
But if your boudoir is turning you off, it could be in need of some TLC.
New bed linen can make your surroundings feel sumptuous and sexy.
Opt for duvet covers with lashings of pink and red because these colours manifest passion, love and desire.
Ditch cotton and opt for silk or bamboo sheets, which feel really soft and luxurious.
Bamboo material will also help keep you cool thanks to its clever moisture-wicking properties and excellent airflow – perfect for when you’re turning up the heat.
Sex up your shower
TAKE sex out of the bedroom to spice things up. Sharing a shower together is a great way to save both time and water.
Beginners can try the wrap-around position. This involves the man standing, lifting up his partner and wrapping her legs around his waist.
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Lean her back against the shower wall to make it easier to hold her up.
It’s guaranteed to turn up the heat – but a non-slip mat is a must!