I’m so sick of d**k pics & ‘Only Plans’ – I ditched dating apps to find love in Morrisons
AFTER a decade of dating apps, have we finally fallen out of love with them?
I certainly have.
After my five-year relationship ended last year I decided to dip my toe in the dating world again.
Friends warned me dating apps had become “worse than ever”.
A cesspit of cyber-flashers, catfishers and Only Plans, a new dating term for time wasters.
Despite their dire reviews, I decided to find out for myself.
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I downloaded the usual suspects — Hinge, Tinder, Happn — and hoped to prove my friends wrong.
After all, before my recent ex I had met someone on a dating app and enjoyed a two-and-a-half year relationship with them.
Maybe I’d get lucky again?
Within ten minutes of swiping I started to receive unsolicited d**k pics with those I’d matched with.
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“Say hello to my not-so-little friend,” one guy wrote, accompanied by a shaven pic of his member.
“This is how excited I am to match with you,” said another, sending me a similar image.
Then there were the tedious messages like: “Hey hun how R U?” and “What you up 2 18r.”
Sorry guys, but if you can’t be bothered to type in proper English then it’s a no from me.
I’m 36, not 16.
As I continued to swipe, I was struck by how many singles were using their dating app bios to showcase their stance on politics, social justice and activism.
“Male, 37, runner/gin lover. Veggie Virgo looking for an environmentally-minded partner.”
Yuck. I’m not looking for male Greta Thunberg, thanks.
I was about to delete the apps when I received a cheeky message from Nick, 38, a lawyer from London: “Georgette, is that a nom de plume?”
It made me laugh and his profile looked good.
No topless gym selfies, no pics of him posing by a posh car and no mention of activism in his bio.
We exchanged a number of messages and he asked to meet up.
But a few hours before our date, he cancelled.
“Sorry babe, stuck in the office, don’t think I’ll get out for a while.
“Can we reschedule?”
I gave him the benefit of the doubt as he did work at a firm notorious for long hours but when he called off our second date, I wrote him off.
“I don’t get why he wants to text all the time but never meet up?”
I moaned to a friend. “If I wanted a pen pal I’d write to someone in prison.”
“Because he’s Only Plans,” she laughed.
“There’s loads of these guys on apps.
“They love texting and making plans but they never follow them through.”
And she was right, I met a few more guys like Nick before I deleted dating apps for good.
Last year, Tinder reported an 18.5 per cent year-on-year drop in US users and web traffic among its competitors fell by up to 22 per cent, according to Similarweb.
And more and more millennials are ditching dating apps for traditional methods.
Unlike Gen Z, we grew up before the internet exploded and remember dating organically.
While I still think dating apps can be good for niche communities — such as the LGBTQIA+ community — a lot of heterosexual singles seem to have had enough.
Perhaps this is because they’ve met their match and have now settled down or maybe they want to meet someone in real life instead.
Now, I look for love offline and it’s been much more fun.
I’ve met people through work, in a bar, at the gym — even at the supermarket!
There’s no filters or facades, making it easier to connect.
I’ve enjoyed spontaneous encounters, flirty glances and chemistry that can’t be replicated on a screen.
While I haven’t met The One yet, I’m enjoying looking for love the old-fashioned way — and the best part?
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No unsolicited dk pics.
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MY FIVE TIPS ON HOW TO FLIRT IN REAL LIFE
Here are Georgie’s tips for dating in real life . . .
1 BE BRAVE: The beauty of dating IRL is you could meet someone anywhere.
Whether it’s at the gym, on public transport or at your local coffee shop — think of any location as an opportunity.
2. GIVE EYE CONTACT: Locking eyes from across the room can kickstart a romance.
To give your crush a hint you’re interested, hold their gaze for four and a half seconds. Anything longer may appear creepy.
3 READ BODY LANGUAGE: Crack the code of non-verbal cues.
Dilated pupils, fixing hair, mirroring your actions and frequently touching you are all signs someone is interested in you.
4 EMBRACE REJECTION: Not every connection blooms!
Don’t be afraid of rejection, instead learn from each interaction and move forward.
5 GIVE COMPLIMENTS: Telling a crush they look good or smell great is a sweet way to break the ice and make them feel good.
Just don’t overdo it as you may come across as cheesy or insincere. Good luck!