My bridesmaid stole my baby name after I had a miscarriage – I want to demote her but don’t know if I’m overreacting
A BRIDE has been left reeling after learning her bridesmaid had stolen her baby name after she had a miscarriage.
She was devastated and wanted to demote her from wedding day duties but hesitated because she wasn't sure if she was just overreacting.
But she had lost her baby only six weeks before and was still recovering physically and emotionally from her loss.
Unsure if she had done the right thing, she took her dilemma to seeking some clarity and reassurance.
There was no uncertainly there from the commenters who had her back all the way.
First, she explained the situation.
She had already picked out a name, Freddie for a boy or Elsie for a girl. But tragedy struck and she never carried her baby to full term.
Still tender from the experience, she attended a barbecue with friends, including one who was pregnant with a boy.
"My best friend asked her if she had any names in mind and she said not really.
"Following the conversation she then asked me if I’d picked out a name for the baby I’d lost and I said Freddie if it was a boy.
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"I said I’d be using it in the future hopefully as we would be trying again as soon as we were able to."
At a birthday meal some weeks later, she learned that her bridesmaid was also calling her baby Freddie. She was shocked.
"I know you can’t claim a name but a fortnight before I’d had an emotional conversation telling her what I’d have called my lost baby."
She was now having serious second thoughts about her being a bridesmaid.
"I think I’m still going to use Freddie in the future but I’m reconsidering having her as a bridesmaid she’s really hurt me."
Commenters were as dismayed as she was and sought to give her some comfort.
One person gave her some perspective: "I have a friend who had many struggles with infertility and her very last attempt at IVF, the very last embryo she named Emmett.
"I’ve always loved the name Emmett, but there’s no way in hell I’m going to name my living child after her dead one. For someone to do this, she has to be completely ignorant to your pain."
A second person said: "Being a bridesmaid is a privilege, don’t give pity invites."
There were some forthright views from this commenter: "Don't be upset. Just know she's a piece of s**t that's all."
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But one commenter offered another viewpoint.
"Maybe she/they had already chosen Freddie but she didn't want to tell anyone the names they had in mind. But her partner chose to let the cat out of the bag."
