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SCRAMBLED EGGS
I’m a mom of twins who are only half-sisters – even doctors are blown away that it’s possible
A MOTHER has revealed that her twin daughters are in fact half-sisters – and she is the biological mother of only one of them.
Sandra Stodola, 34, welcomed her longed-for fraternal twin girls via IVF in February after trying to conceive for nearly four years.
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The first-time mother from Rochester, New York has spoken openly about her twins' unique genetic makeup, with her husband, Jack, the biological father of both their girls.
Eleanor Ann and Evelyn Louise, now four months old, were born after the couple spent $26,000 (£21,000) on five heart-breaking rounds of IVF.
Sandra, a Physician's Assistant, explained: “We tried with my eggs for four rounds of IVF but I was told my eggs were very poor quality.
“We were very lucky to get three full rounds of IVF covered by insurance, but they failed.”
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The couple was devastated, and Sandra openly admits she was ready to give up.
"I wanted to stop every time, mentally it was so hard," she said. “It was a big loss. I had named all of the previous SEVEN embryos, chosen nursey themes, and I was grieving for what could have been.
“It was very hard. I went through all the stages of grief, being angry and asking why me?
“I always said I couldn’t go through the pain of a failed round again, but I knew that never having a baby was worse and soon enough I would want to try again.”
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Sandra and Jack spent around $20,000 (£16,300) on a fourth round using Sandra’s eggs paired with donor eggs – but again, the couple was left heartbroken.
“I had so much hope waiting for the test and then my stomach would drop every time," Sandra said.
“I truly believed it would never happen for us.”
After four failed rounds, the couple decided to try one last time with a frozen embryo transfer at an additional cost of $6,000 (£4,900), using the last of Sandra’s frozen embryos.
They also used donor eggs to increase their chances.
“Our fifth attempt really was a last-ditch effort," Sandra said. “We decided to use both my egg and frozen donor eggs.
“I didn’t want to give up on myself entirely, but I never thought after so many failed rounds and years of trying naturally that my own egg would ever work.
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“We were just so hopeful that one egg would stick.”
The parents-to-be were amazed to discover nine days later that Sandra was finally pregnant – but a bigger shock was soon to come.
She said: “We found out at 6 weeks it was twins, and knowing we had used one of my eggs and one donor egg, we knew then they would be unique.
“They are fraternal twins and half-sisters with different biological mothers and the same father.”
Sandra added: “Some doctors we came across were blown away and every nurse we told was amazed.
“We honestly feel so blessed and I will tell anyone who will listen our story.
“When people ask, 'Are they identical twins?' I love to watch their face when I say, 'Actually no, they are half-sisters, with two different mom genes.'”
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The sisters were born at 36 weeks via emergency C-section. Eleanor was born two minutes earlier weighing 5lbs 9oz, and Evelyn was 5lbs 1oz.
Though she had a textbook pregnancy, Sandra was petrified that she would lose her babies.
“I was convinced there was a problem, even seeing them grow every week on scans, I was petrified I would never get to hold them.
“I was too scared to be happy, finally being pregnant didn’t mean I would have a baby. I just could not believe this was finally happening for us.”
But now they are the proud parents of two beautiful daughters.
Sandra said that both she and Jack know which daughter is biologically hers, and it is not something they will keep from their girls.
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“Just from looking at her, I know which daughter shares my genes. I have very strong genes and it’s physically obvious, but we don’t make it known to people outside of our family," Sandra said.
“However, we will be open with the girls. It won’t be a sit down serious talk when they are a certain age, they will grow up hearing about how they came to be our daughters and when they turn 18 they can search for the donor if they want to.”
Now Sandra and Jack are settling into life as a family of four.
She said: “It took 43 months, 4 egg retrievals, 5 transfers, and 516 shots to have our daughters.
“I am still in a state of surreal shock that these beautiful girls are mine.
“They already love each other so much, they lock eyes and they light up when they see each other. They are always babbling away to each other.”
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Sandra is keen to share her experience in the hope it will help more women speak openly about fertility issues.
She said: “I love sharing my experience. My goal is to make infertility as normal to talk about as any other part of motherhood.
“When I was going through it, I hated hearing people say to stay positive, it will happen when the time is right, or cheer up, so I don’t say those things.
“I try to ask what do they need now – to vent, cry, shout? Don’t hide your emotions, but don’t give up.
“We had to fight so long and hard but our daughters are worth every second of that journey.
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“So much went into making these girls, the pain, depression, and anxiety, but they are worth every penny, every needle, and the heartbreak of the failed cycles.
“We are so happy to give them all the love we saved up, and so much more.”
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