Harry Styles looks great in a blouse – but I want a manly man, says Ulrika Jonsson
ANOTHER day, another male sleb in a blouse, clutching a handbag or wearing heels.
Everton striker Dominic Calvert-Lewin, on the cover of with his double-denim jumpsuit and a Chanel handbag.
And now I’m just a bit perplexed and irritated. The footballer speaks openly about his love of fashion and his “flamboyance”.
And there’s Harry Styles. He’s got it all. Looks, voice, rhythm (an older girlfriend!) and a somewhat flexible fashion sense.
This is one young man who is more than a little comfortable turning up on the red carpet in dresses, cardigans, sequins and pearls. He has a penchant for scarves. And when he first appeared publicly like this, it felt utterly unexpected. But I initially thought: “Good on you, boy.”
He had always been such a macho, naughty boy, draped in tattoos, and suddenly he is turning up in heels. I don’t quite understand the point.
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My question now is: Where have all the men gone? Sure, fashion is just an extension of our personalities. It’s an expression of ourselves. Which, granted, could pertain to an element of: “Look at me, everybody.”
What about the divinely beautiful actor Timothee Chalamet, who threw caution to the wind and went topless (under his bejewelled tuxedo) to The Oscars.
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Message of ambiguity
And not forgetting US actor and musician Jared Leto, who enjoys a lilac suit accessorised with a floral scarf and a pretty clutch/handbag. But why are these men choosing to dress like this?
There is no denying there are strong androgynous undertones (and overtones) about their way of dressing. Of course, it can merely be a way of declaring and articulating their style. Some might argue it’s just a bit of fun. I don’t seem to be laughing.
I’ve got confusion running all down my baggy joggers — it’s neither one thing nor the other. I’m going to sound like a dinosaur when I say this doesn’t sit easy with me. At all.
Let’s be clear. It doesn’t repulse me in any way. It just gives out a strong message of ambiguity towards their sexual identity, suggests they are not strictly either female or masculine.
They may not think it has that effect, but it does. It makes me stop and wonder. There are no laws against men wearing dresses and heels and imagine what a boring world we would live in without drag queens.
But this feels like a watered-down version of drag, like a little plaything just put in place to create attention, debate and contemplation. Not to mention confusion. And to that end, I can’t escape the feeling that this is really just a “trend”.
I can’t escape the feeling that this is really just a 'trend'.
Ulrika Jonsson
Part of me feels like this doesn’t come from the soul, from the heart or a clever mind. It’s almost become a one-upmanship of who can outdo the next guy in the best blouse.
I know these guys are no less men because they slip on a dress or a feather boa. I’m also acutely aware that the way women and men dress is purely of social construct and some men are just having fun or taking the mickey — they enjoy it.
As you may very well know, I don’t always conform. Conformity is for followers, not leaders.
It’s for the boring, not the slightly bonkers. For example, I never dressed my babies in the colour that is habitually allocated to their sex. I dressed them in black. A tad extreme, perhaps, and it caused bewilderment on many occasions when people would stop my pram and ask how old my boy was, when he was, in fact, a girl.
I hated my girls’ love of princesses, ballet and all things pink and glittery. I didn’t want it foisted on them at such a tender age. So maybe I was ahead of the curve 30 years ago.
If a bloke turned up for a date with me wearing a dress, I’m not sure how I would respond. I might struggle to bring myself to slide my hand inside his dress and up his legs in search of his crown jewels . . . It’s not that it scares me in any way. It’s just unsettling. And if that makes me a stick-in-the-mud, then so be it.
'Misleading'
I love a masculine man. That’s just me. It doesn’t ever have to be at the expense of him being in touch with his feminine side. Why can’t men just be comfortable being “basic”, ordinary men? Why are they so fixated on being so overtly feminine? After all, that’s what they have us ridiculous women for.
I’m sure there is a bit of envy there — women can wear both dresses and pants. And from a quick glance at the past three weeks’ awards ceremonies — the Baftas, Oscars and Grammys — it’s clear the guys have less choice. It’s a suit or tuxedo. Whereas the women can go in huge flowing gowns, provocative dresses or . . . even a tuxedo.
I’m not suggesting for one minute the men who enjoy partaking in an occasional flouncy, bouncy blouse or a tight dress should change the way they dress to appease me. As if they would?
While I can definitely see the bravery and determination in what they do, I also find it muddies the waters and feels misleading.
This does not make me a bigot. There are men out there who have been doing it for years and carry it off because it is part of their identity.
When guys are just throwing on a dress or a blouse, does it empower them? In the same way women were made to feel empowered by wearing trousers because they were constantly sexualised in skirts and dresses?
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Women wearing trousers was also a question of practicality and yes, it put us on a more even footing. What does putting a skirt on for a man actually do? I’d love to know.
It may be that I’m old-fashioned, quaint and resistant to change when it comes to men in skirts. It’s not that I feel threatened by it, I just quite like my fellas in trousers and flats. Calm down, dear. It’s only an opinion.
IT’S JUST FASHION EVOLVING
Ulrika Jonsson
MR DARCY emerging from the lake in his water-drenched billowing blouse still gets women hot under the collar 27 years after the scene appeared on TV.
But the fact he’s wearing a “feminine” shirt in the BBC version of Pride And Prejudice doesn’t seem to bother women – or men.
So it’s strange that a man who is at the top of his career, physically fit, looks good in double denim and wants to carry a handbag gets some knickers in a twist.
I don’t see why. Ladies, we wear trousers, suits, shorts – pretty much everything men wear. But they are not allowed to tip their toe into our wardrobes?
Of course they are. Imagine the first time a man wore pink. The shock, the awe, the jibes about him looking too girly. But these days we love a bloke in blush.
One of the manliest men around, Daniel Craig, wore fuchsia to the premier of James Bond flick No Time To Die in October.
In the early Eighties heart-throb Indiana Jones actor Harrison Ford wasn’t seen without his man bag – fast forward to now and the trend has just evolved.
Soon enough all lads will be carrying the latest armcandy and it won’t be such a shock. Just like men wearing pink, a bloke carrying a handbag or wearing a skirt or dress will become a stable symbol for men who are secure in their masculinity.
And us ladies will more than likely take style inspiration from them.