I’m obese & have anorexia – trolls accuse me of lying for attention & I couldn’t believe it at first, says Tess Holliday
SHE'S the plus-sized model who has amassed over 2.5m followers on Instagram thanks to her inspiring messages of body positivity.
But Tess Holliday, 36, has confessed she still struggles with disordered eating and was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa in 2021.
Almost one year on from her diagnosis, Tess has now bravely hit back at critics in a personal essay for .
After her mother was tragically shot when Tess was 10, the model says she started using "food to cope" and would hide snacks from her loved ones.
But over the past decade, the mum-of-two claims she's also gone through phases where she has "restricted food" too.
She explained: "That means I don’t eat — or when I do eat, it’s very little.
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"Or sometimes it’s one large meal a day."
Last year, Tess was officially diagnosed with anorexia - at a time when she was being encouraged to "keep her weight loss up" by people in her life.
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When her nutritionist first suspected Tess was exhibiting symptoms of the eating disorder, the model replied: “Do you see how fat I am? There’s no way that word could ever be attached to someone my size.”
However, Tess claims a psychologist later confirmed the diagnosis and the model is now in recovery.
According to , anorexia can manifest itself differently for different people.
Their website reads: "[Sufferers] may be a weight considered 'normal' for their age, sex, and expected development.
"Depending on the exact symptoms, they might be diagnosed with atypical anorexia or another form of other specified feeding or eating disorder (OSFED). This is just as serious and can develop both into or from anorexia."
What is anorexia nervosa?
Anorexia nervosa, often known as just anorexia, is a very serious mental health condition which causes the person to restrict the amount they eat.
Usually, a sufferer will go to great lengths to disguise the fact they are not eating or pretending they have eaten already.
But if you suspect someone is battling the condition there are a few signs to look out for, .
These include:
- Missing meals, eating very little or avoiding eating any fatty foods
- Obsessively counting calories in food
- Leaving the table immediately after eating so they can vomit
- Taking appetite suppressants, laxatives, or diuretics (a type of medication that helps remove fluid from the body)
- Repeatedly weighing themselves or checking their body in the mirror
- Physical problems, such as feeling lightheaded or dizzy, hair loss, or dry skin
Although she only ever wanted to make others feel "less alone" by sharing her struggle, Tess was the subject of internet trolls after she bravely shared the news.
She said: "People said I was lying. There are people who believe I was saying this to get attention.
"I’ve had some people say, 'You’re doing this to stay relevant'.
But recently, Tess says she has started to "regress" and had only taken two sips of coffee on the day she was writing her personal essay.
She continued: "I still struggle with wrapping my head around, 'How can I be in a fat body and be starving?' Then I realised that bodies of all sizes and shapes starve [...]
I still struggle with wrapping my head around, 'How can I be in a fat body and be starving?' Then I realised that bodies of all sizes and shapes starve.
Tess Holliday
"It’s tough when you hear the word anorexia and it’s only equated with one kind of image. It’s detrimental to so many people, including myself."
Unsurprisingly, Tess finds January a particularly challenging time of year as people pledge to lose weight in the new year - but she's making an effort to always have snacks that are easy to "grab and eat" in the house.
As part of her recovery, Tess is seeing a therapist and urged anyone else struggling with an eating disorder to seek one out.
"One of the bright spots that has come from COVID-19 has been increased access to mental health professionals online," Tess added. "I found someone to talk to through just Googling someone in my area. I literally would not have been able to do any of this if I didn’t have that help."
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