I can’t stop cheating on my boyfriends and worry I should just be single forever
Read Deidre's personal replies to today's problems
DEAR DEIDRE: I WAS only meant to be popping round for a cup of tea with an old friend last week – but I ended up having sex with him.
I have a boyfriend and it’s like I have a compulsion to cheat all the time.
I’m a 25-year-old woman and I’ve always found it hard to settle for one man.
I have an interesting past as I was a swinger from the ages of 21 to 23 — then I met a man I thought was for me.
We even got engaged but I am away a lot organising trade stands for the clothing company I work for.
When I was away at a fashion fair a few months ago, we hardly spoke.
Whenever I called him he seemed more interested in his PlayStation though he’s a grown man of 26.
I met a lovely guy working on the next stand. He brought me back a coffee on the second day and we got chatting and flirting.
We swapped phone numbers and spoke for hours after I got back home.
He was all I could think about. He’s 37 and divorced.
My fiancé became suspicious because my phone was always busy when he tried to call me — we weren’t living together.
He wouldn’t believe that I was at home after work.
He’d already caught me out a couple of times having one-night stands and he accused me of cheating again.
In fact I hadn’t cheated at that point but this guy landed a job with the same company as me.
It meant him moving to live near me too so I offered to help him move into his new flat.
We spent an afternoon sorting his stuff, then opened a bottle of wine.
Before long, we started kissing and had sex.
I then finished with my fiancé and am now supposed to be in a relationship with the new guy.
We’ve been dating for six weeks and things were going well until I bumped into a guy I went to secondary school with.
Topic for the day
THREE out of five couples are less than fully satisfied with their sex life, and often it is just down to lazy habits rather than any specific problems.
My e-leaflet How To Have Great Sex is a guide to getting the basics right, which can help beginners and those needing a sexual MoT.
Email me for a copy at [email protected]
We are the same age and have always flirted with each other on and off.
He invited me round for a cup of tea last week. One thing led to another and we ended up having sex.
I wonder if it would be better if I were single.
DEIDRE SAYS: You certainly don’t sound ready to settle down.
What led you to get involved with swinging when you were only just into your twenties?
It’s an unusual choice for so young a woman. It makes me wonder what your childhood was like.
Was it chaotic so you crave adrenalin-filled highs and lows because that’s what you’re used to?
Popular Dear Deidre problems
Did it leave you feeling unloved? Have you been mistaking the offer of sex for an offer of love?
My e-leaflet Can’t Be Faithful? will help you think all this through.
Don’t hang on to this relationship if it’s not good for you right now.
Best take some time to be single and learn to value yourself before getting involved in another relationship.
READ TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE Girlfriend is shy to show me off and I fear she is into her ex
READ TODAY'S PHOTO CASEBOOK Melanie in a foul mood after secret lover's wife revealed pregnancy
Get in touch with Deidre today
Got a problem? Send an email to [email protected]. Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
You can also send a private message on the Facebook page.
Follow me on Twitter