When my female friend kissed me, you helped me let her down kindly
DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my female friend kissed me, after making it clear she wanted more from me than friendship, I didn’t know how to handle it.
I wasn’t interested in her romantically, but she didn’t seem to get the message.
I’m a 27-year-old man, and she’s 24.
We were good mates after working together in a bar. Although I liked her company, she kept asking me out or inviting me to hers.
I always said no.
One night, she got drunk and kissed me. I went along with it but afterwards felt so awkward around her.
You told me I needed to spell out my feelings in a kind but firm way, making it clear I still valued her friendship.
You sent me your support pack, Standing Up For Yourself, to show me how to do this.
I followed your advice, which gave me the confidence to say what I needed.
She was upset that I’m not interested and admitted she’d fallen for me.
Things were uncomfortable for a while, but she’s now accepted my decision and we’re better friends than ever.
Thank you.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: I’m so pleased I helped you to get the message across.
Good friendships are rare and often last longer than romances.
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