My partner spends over an hour checking locks every time we leave the house

DEAR DEIDRE: EVERY time my partner and I leave the house, he spends more than an hour checking and double checking that all the locks are locked. 

I know it’s something that plays on his mind, so I’ve tried my best to be understanding, but after a few too many missed reservations, I’m losing my patience.

I’m 45, my boyfriend is 48, and we’ve been together for three years. 

Since we met, I’ve always known him to struggle with anxiety and nerves. If there was something to worry about, he’d find it.

However, over the last few months things have intensified, and he’s become increasingly obsessed with checking the locks on the doors every time we leave the house. 

Every time it follows the same pattern - he'll lock all the doors and windows and proceed to check them at least a dozen times before he’s comfortable leaving the house. 

He says he can’t trust himself and won’t relax unless he’s completely sure he’s done it right.

I can tell it’s getting him down. How do I help him?

DEIDRE SAYS: This behaviour, obsessively checking locks, sounds very much like a type of obsessive compulsive disorder.

OCD can take a huge toll on a person’s mental health, so it’s important your partner receives help. 

My support packs on Overcoming Obsessions and Living With Anxiety will tell you who to contact.

He can also get in touch with OCD UK (, Tel: 01332 588112 ).

It’s a good idea for him to make an appointment with his GP to ask about specialist counselling too.