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How long should I wait for my husband to come back to me?

READ Dear Deidre Editor Sally Land's personal replies to today's problems.
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DEAR DEIDRE: EVEN though my husband and I are separated, we talk and see each other nearly every day. We have had some lovely nights out together.

We want to save our marriage but I am finding it difficult to cope as I am going through the menopause as well as not having my husband around.

He has told me several times that he will come back but doesn’t want to rush it.

I’m 58 and my husband’s 61. I’m angry with him for leaving me when I’m trying to cope with the awful symptoms of the menopause. He knows what I’m going through but isn’t very supportive.

I feel abandoned. He wants to celebrate our wedding anniversary later this month but I don’t feel as though there is much to celebrate when we are living apart.

How long do I wait for him to come back to me? I can’t keep my life on hold. Do I give him the time he needs or just walk away?

DEIDRE SAYS: The menopause can be a particularly challenging time, but having a supportive partner can make a huge difference.

Talk about what changes might make it possible for you to try again and discuss a timescale for your husband to move back in.

My support pack Menopause Explained may help.

By indulging your husband you’re allowing him to take his time and live his life on his terms, ignoring your feelings and needs. You’re simply hanging on meaning you have no control over your life.

If you continue to put up with this it will gradually erode your confidence and self-esteem.

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