I fear I’ve ruined my friendship with my colleague since we slept together
DEAR DEIDRE: I HAD the best friendship with my colleague but we’ve slept together and now I feel it’s ruined everything.
We’ve always had a connection. He’s 31 and I’m 28. We get along well and often go out after work.
One evening I dropped him back home after a bowling evening. He was a little drunk but I was sober. I took him into his flat because he wanted me to see his new kitchen.
We were a little flirty and I asked him if he ever felt anything for me. He said he did but he always thought it would spoil things, and then he kissed me.
We had sex anyway. He was one incredible lover. He made me go to heaven and back.
I’m now back at work and I think he’s avoiding me.
DEIDRE SAYS: He may not be avoiding you but waiting to see how you play it.
He may feel he overstepped a boundary and that you wouldn’t have liked it - he was the one who had alcohol fuelling his Dutch courage after all.
Ask whether you can meet up again, for lunch and have a heart-to-heart with him. Tell him that there’s no need to feel awkward and that you had a really amazing time with him.
The best relationships are born out of friendship so this could be the start of something special.
It may be that you are pleasantly surprised at his response. Good luck.
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