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AGE GAP

I finished with my older boyfriend because I worried about my parents’ reaction

READ Dear Deidre Editor Sally Land's personal replies to today's problems.

DEAR DEIDRE: I COULDN'T bear to think about the disappointment on the faces of my parents if I were to tell them about my age gap relationship, so I ended it.

I’m 21 and female and the man I had met through work was 45. We both work for a charity.

My Dad is only 46 and he’s always been very protective. I knew he’d never accept me being with somebody who is the same age as him.

My colleague started chatting with me at lunchtime in the canteen then we made sure we were together every day.

It developed from talking, to flirting, to him coming on to me one night in his car and then we ended up having sex.

He is sexy, confident, kind and looks after me.

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He is the person I could talk to about anything but he lived with somebody else.

He said he couldn’t afford a place on his own so there’s no relationship between him and this woman.

He was upset when I broke up with him. I have to admit that I really miss him but should I be looking for somebody who is around my age?

MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE

DEIDRE SAYS: If you have your doubts now, then yes. If your father is overly strict with you, maybe this man is the father figure you would like him to be.

But you are at different life stages and my guess is that the cracks were already beginning to show, but you’ve chosen to think about how your family would react as an excuse to bring things to a close.

You also can’t be certain he’s telling you the truth about the woman he lives with. Could he be cheating on her?

Talking about your feelings will really help so contact The Mix (, 0808 808 4994) which offers free in-house telephone counselling for under-25s.

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